Fergie leaving the Sonya Dakar Skin Clinic in Beverly Hills (1/5)

+ Amy Winehouse gropes herself (NSFW) [Drunken Stepfather]

+ You Had Me at Olivia Munn Bikini Pictures [Egotastic!]
+ That one dude from Baywatch used to be a meth head [Just Jared]
+ Lily Allen doing a little topless sunbathing (NSFW) [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ Mira Sorvino has nice funbags [Bastardly]

+ Big booties are good for your health [Lossip]
+ Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway hold hands [Webster's Is My Bitch]
+ Cindy Crawford hates Miley Cyrus [Cele|bitchy]
+ Quarterback gets choke slammed [UBERGUY]

Martin Short in St. Bart's (1/6)

I'm not ashamed to admit it. I prayed last night that I would see Martin Short's ass today. And, lo and behold, there it is. Thanks Jesus!

Mickey Rourke at the UK premiere of The Wrestler in London (1/5)

Is Mickey Rourke retarded? Clearly, yes.

Jessica Alba and her mom Catherine in Beverly Hills (1/6)

You know how most women end up looking like their mom? Well I'm pretty sure if Cash Warren left now, he could be deep into Mexico by sundown. "I look like Cash who? Umm, my name's Juan."

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt at the premiere of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button in L.A. (12/8)

This whole Brad Pitt-Angelina Jolie-Jennifer Aniston story simply will not die. Last year, Angelina told the New York Times that Brad and her fell in love on the set of Mr. & Mrs. Smith in 2005 -- when he was still married to Jennifer. Shortly after the revelation, in an interview with Vogue, Jennifer said Angelina was "uncool." Now Brad Pitt is telling W magazine oh god who cares please shut up.

“Listen, man, Jen is a sweetheart,” Pitt says, as if to settle this thing once and for all. “I think she got dragged into that one, and then there’s a second round to all of that Angie versus Jen. It’s so created.” Of his current relationship with Aniston, he says, “We still check in with each other. She was a big part of my life, and me hers. I don’t see how there cannot be [that]. That’s life, man. That’s life.”

“What people don’t understand is that we filmed [Mr. & Mrs. Smith] for a year,” he explains. “We were still filming after Jen and I split up. Even then it doesn’t mean that there was some kind of dastardly affair. There wasn’t. I’m very proud of the way that it was handled. It was respectful. [The film] will mean something to our kids. It will, that’s all.” (Source)

You know why I respect gangmembers? Because when one steals another's husband, they don't bitch and whine about it to the press. They just shoot each other. Why can't celebrities be more like gangmembers? Tell me you wouldn't love to wake up to a story about Jennifer Aniston busting a cap in the side of Angelina Jolie's Range Rover. That would be so fucking awesome.

Sarah Shahi

Actress and model Sarah Shahi at the premiere of Bride Wars at AMC Loews Lincoln Square in New York (1/5)

Paris Hilton leaving Kate Somerville Medi Spa in L.A. (1/6)

In addition to the claim that Lindsay Lohan and she are friends again, there was one more little interesting tidbit in the interview Paris Hilton did with Glamour. She claims she's not as big a whore as everyone thinks. In fact, she's only slept with a couple of people (wait, is she only counting last Saturday night or her entire life?):

"I've only done it with a couple of people. People make up stories, but mostly I just kiss. I think it's important to play hard to get. Nobody wants the fake Prada bag; they want the brand new bag that no one can get and is the most expensive. If you give it up to a guy he won't respect you; he'll want you much more if he can't have you." (Source)

Having seen One Night in Paris, I'm actually inclined to believe Paris has very little experience in the bedroom -- only a guillotine gives worse head. However, her analogy that her lady parts are like a Prada bag is a little off. She's correct that her vadge is like a leather accessory, but a better comparison would be to a worn out boot -- with athlete's foot.

Ashley Tisdale bikini pics!

Ashley Tisdale in Malibu (July 2007)

Lindsay Lohan out and about in Los Feliz (1/2)

Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan are friends again. The two had been fighting for the last few years over something. I don't know, probably a guy. The feud escalated in 2006 when Hilton -- 25-years-old at the time mind you -- referred to Lindsay as a "firecrotch." But I guess it's all good now. Paris told Glamour:

"We're fine now. I think she's really changed. I saw her a month ago and she was really sweet and seemed really happy and we're all adults now. Actually I've just decided not to fight with anyone because it's really not worth it." (Source)

I see what's going on here. Now that Lindsay's switched teams, Paris wants to tap that ass. Lindsay may get all the headlines but don't forget that Paris is bi, too. Remember her makeout session with Elisha Cuthbert and Kristin Cavallari or those rumors about her and Britney Spears getting it on? She's probably had her eye on that dyke Lindsay for some time now. Holy shit, could you imagine if these two combined their powers and started dating? I could see the headlines now: SLUTZILLA DESTROYS HALF OF HOLLYWOOD! THOUSANDS REPORT BURNING SENSATION WHEN THEY PEE! GOVERNOR DECLARES STATE OF EMERGENCY!

Britney's been scheming

Remember Britney Spears' plan to go on a hunger strike to protest all of her dad's rules and gain a little bit of her freedom back? It didn't work :( -- but don't worry, she has another plan up her sleeve. She's going to allege that her dad -- a recovering alcoholic -- is drinking again and then take the evidence to court. Hooray! A close source told the National Enquirer:

"Britney is desperate to be released from her father Jamie's control. She wants to be able to act like an adult, but she says her father won't let her. And it infuriates her that everyone is giving Jamie credit for her hit song 'Womanizer' and for her looking so good again. Britney says she's worked her butt off for years, and her father has had nothing to do with her success.

"Britney wants to set up her dad and prove he shouldn't be in charge of her career decisions and money. Britney wants to take evidence to court that Jamie is drinking again. If the conservatorship is continued, her backup plan is to have her father replaced by her mother Lynne because she's less rigid." (Print Edition - 12/29)

Great idea. Get rid of the guy that turned your life/career around and replace him with the woman that nearly drove you to commit suicide. At this point, the courts could find out that Jamie's an alcoholic, womanizing, animal-abusing, heroin junkie who spends wayyyyy too much time at playgrounds for someone without a kid and they'd still rule that he's better suited as Britney's conservator than Lynne. Unfortunately for Britney, there's only one option she can pursue to make sure her father is no longer interested in controlling her life: go broke.