Tori Spelling

Tori Spelling is topless

Dean McDermott tweeted a picture of his son Liam last night. Oh yeah, AND HIS WIFE TORI SPELLING'S BOOBS. Which is weird, because you know, those monstrosities are kinda hard to miss. In other awkward news, Tori Spelling apparently just lays around the house topless. NOTE TO SELF: decline all future dinner party invitations from Tori Spelling.

NOTE: To see the uncensored Tori Spelling pics, click the picture above or any thumbnail with a yellow star on it and then click the "Full Size" button located at the top or bottom of the image.

*5 Tori Spelling pictures total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling and her implants in Maui in 2000

I think this goes without saying, but Tori Spelling really regrets the boob implants she got when she was younger -- implants that have never looked good btw (that's her 12 years ago). Where did she get those things done, North Korea? She told Good Morning America on Wednesday:

"Well I got my boobs done ... in my early 20s. If I had known that it would or could possibly impact production of (breast) milk, I wouldn't have had them ... I love being a mom. I'm on my third baby. We want to have more. Like, that's my role. These (big breasts) don't matter."

Tori regrets getting fake tits because it's affected her ability to breast feed? I would have thought she regrets getting them because it made her chest look more sunken than the housing market. As a matter of fact, the gap Tori's sporting these days is so large that it even makes Paris Hilton feel uncomfortable. Of course, Tori does have reason to be concerned about the effects of breastfeeding on her kids. They've probably ingested more plastic than Lindsay Lohan's vagina after a night at Sam Ronson's house.

*21 Tori Spelling bikini pictures total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling in Malibu (Malibu - 5/30)

My mom always told me that if I don't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all. But I'm assuming that bitch never saw Tori Spelling and her haunted chest in a bikini. These may be the first bikini pics that give me PTSD. I'll let you know in a week if I wake up in a cold sweat.

*15 Tori Spelling pictures total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling at the Oxygen Upfront presentation at Gotham Hall in New York (4/4)

We can put a man on the Moon -- the fucking Moon -- but we can't figure out a way to make Tori Spelling's chest not look like it has a disturbing shrapnel wound? WTF science? I thought you were cool.

*25 Tori Spelling pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Saturday, January 29 and Sunday, January 30

Tori Spelling participating in her friend Amy Colvin's wedding at the Beverly Hills Hotel (pics start here)

Jennifer Love Hewitt filming an interview with Mario Lopez for Extra at The Grove in Hollywood (pics start here)

Kendall Jenner shopping at Barneys New York in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend Matthew Rutler leaving Nobu in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Jordana Brewster at La Conversation in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Kristin Cavallari leaving Spanish Kitchen in L.A. (pics start here)

Actress Kelly Macdonald shopping in New York (pics start here)

Angie Everhart leaving Mr. Chow in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Camila Alves (Matthew McConaughey's girlfriend) and her son Levi shopping at the Malibu Country Mart (pics start here)

Elizabeth Berkley out and about in L.A. (pics start here)

Nicole Richie leaving a salon in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Paulina Rubio shopping at H&M in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Selena Gomez at LAX airport (pics start here)

*122 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling at the Ritz Carlton in South beach (7/22)

Holy shit, is that Tori Spelling at a restaurant? Eating? We might as well be looking at a picture of Bigfoot. Or the second sniper on the grassy knoll. I bet the paparazzo that took this picture was able to sell it for 10 million dollars. "Great news kids, we can finally afford college!"

*29 photos total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling leaving the All Saints Episcopal Church in Pasadena (7/15)

Earlier this month, Tori Spelling's husband Dean McDermott punctured and collapsed a lung after a pretty gnarly dirt bike accident . . . or as Tori called it "a publicity opportunity." From the Chicago Sun Times:

While various Hollywood folks claim Tori Spelling went out of her way to turn husband Dean McDermott's release from the hospital into a big media event, the TV personality tweeted just the opposite. One of Spelling's tweets blared, "SUPER disrespectful for tons of paparazzi to follow us and take pics as our family is trying to enter hospital ... NOT COOL!"

Interesting, given several of my L.A. paparazzi pals insist it was Spelling herself who tipped them to McDermott's hospitalization for injuries from a dirt-bike crash -- and the timing of his release.

Tori's doing it all wrong. If she wants to say one thing but do another, she shouldn't live in Hollywood. She should live in Washington D.C. Besides, if they hadn't been tipped off, there's a simple reason why the paparazzi never would have known Dean was in the hospital: no one cares. From now on, if Tori wants to garner attention, she should do it the way she's done it for the past 15 years: bad mouth her mom show off her tits.

*28 pictures total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling in Encino (7/8)

I know what you're thinking: holy crap, Tori Spelling has anorexia. Well according to Tori, she doesn't have an eating disorder because she "always eats breakfast, lunch, and dinner." Take last week for example. Monday she had breakfast, Thursday she had lunch, and Saturday she had dinner. Seems perfectly healthy to me.

*17 photos total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling stopping by Toys "R" Us in Reseda (6/21)

Wanted to take a moment and issue a big congratulations to Tori Spelling. She finally lost enough weight to fit into the pants she used to wear in 4th grade. Way to go Tori!

*11 pics total in the gallery:

Tori Spelling at the release party for her new book uncharted terriTori at HighBar nightclub in New York (6/16)

Tori Spelling is convinced that she made contact with the ghost of Farrah Fawcett. So uh, yeah Tori, you might want to keep that to yourself. Also, the jaw. Can you maybe cover that thing up from now on when you're out in public? I really don't think that's asking too much. From Access Hollywood:

In a new interview, [Farrah Fawcett's] former neighbor, Tori Spelling, told Access Hollywood that the blonde bombshell visited her from beyond during a psychic reading.

“I was talking to a medium,” Tori told Access Hollywood. “I was hoping my dad [‘Charlie’s’ Angels’ producer Aaron Spelling] would come through.”

Instead of hearing from her father, while sitting down with medium and talk show host John Edward, it was the former “Angel” Tori heard from.

“Farrah Fawcett came through in my reading loud and clear,” Tori continued. “It was really awkward for him as well. He’s like, ‘I have never had this happen.’ She wanted me to give a message to her family about how she was doing and what was going on and I’m like, ‘Great! She really picked the wrong person.’”

No wonder Tori's broke. When she's not spending money on botched boob jobs, she's out flushing cash down the toilet on séances. Frankly, the only way Tori could blow through money faster is if she was in Congress. Besides, if Tori isn't convinced that hanging out with spirits can lead to her ruin, all she has to do is look at Lindsay Lohan.

*21 pics total in the gallery: