Tim Tebow

Olivia Culpo leaving Craig's restaurant in West Hollywood (9/3)

After being dumped by Nick Jonas, Miss Universe 2012 Olivia Culpo rebounded with famous football-playing virgin Tim Tebow. It was basically the equivalent of a 4-year-old buying a Lamborghini Aventador. What the hell is a 4-year-old gonna do with a 700 horsepower supercar? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. From the New York Daily News:
"He was really into her," a source close to the model told us, "he was sending her love letters and cute notes and professing his love for her."

"She had to break up with him because she just couldn't handle it," said our insider, "He still hits her up, but she just can't deal with the sex thing. He's pretty adamant about it, I guess."
On the one hand, you have to admire the man for sticking to the principles of his faith, no matter the enormity of the temptation. On the other, what a god damn stupid fucking idiot.

*15 Olivia Culpo pictures total in the gallery:

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Camilla Belle is just plain pretty

God's favorite virgins Tim Tebow and Camilla Belle are getting serious with each other. Camilla's already met Tim's parents, and they approve -- especially his dad *wink*wink*. From In Touch Weekly:
"His mom, Pam, likes that Camilla comes from a strict Catholic family, and loves that she does so much work with a children's charity," an insider tells In Touch. "Pam thinks Camilla could be the girl Tim has been waiting for!"

The couple have been seeing each other since May of 2012, but they did not officially start dating until the end of the summer due to their hectic careers. Since then they have spent as much time as they can together and they are on the phone with each other a couple of times a day, the source tells In Touch.
Aw, how cute, Tim's on the phone with Camilla a couple of times a day. Oh hey, you know what I do with my girlfriend a couple of times a day? GET NAKED AND HAVE SEX. But I'm sure phone calls are just as fun. Sucker.

*20 Camilla Belle pictures total in the gallery:

  • Camilla Belle Met Parents 1
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Camilla Belle and Tim Tebow are a match made in heaven

Turns out Tim Tebow and rumored new girlfriend Camilla Belle are perfect for each other, in the virgin sort of way. And I'm not even talking about Camilla being one of those "technically I'm a virgin because I've only taken it up the butt" religious chicks. She's an honest to goodness unspoiled young woman. From the National Enquirer:
"Both say they're virgins," an insider divulged. "They've been dating secretly since the summer, but they can't hide their love any longer.Tim is looking for a woman so he can have a proper engagement and church wedding, and he's told friends that Camilla fits the bill."

Plenty of women - including reality star Kim Kardashian - have made a play for Tebow, but pals say Camilla's the first to capture his heart.

"Tim calls her 'the woman of his dreams,'" added the insider. "He's anxious to make Camilla part of his close-knit family." (Print Edition - 11/19)
ZZZZZzzzzzz . . . Get it? That's me, sleeping instead of writing about these two snoozers. What can I say about Timmy and Camilla that'll get anybody worked up over them? They're so innocent that I can't even use the words "hooking up," because there is no hooking going on. There's something about being virgins past 21 years of age that always makes me think that they're either gonna save the world, or the relationship will end in a bloody murder-suicide. Lets go for the save the world bit, because I have a nugget riding on the Jets to at least break even this year.

*20 Camilla Belle pictures total in the gallery:

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Camilla Belle at the Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York (5/7)

Famous virgin football player Tim Tebow might be dating famous attractive actress Camilla Belle. The same Camilla Belle who used to date famous virgin musician Joe Jonas. Wow, she must have the most impressive vibrator collection on earth. From TMZ:
Tim and Camilla Belle showed up at Latitude 30 in Jacksonville, Florida Tuesday night, where they bowled and partied. People who were at Latitude 30 last night tell us Tim and Camilla were overly affectionate throughout the evening, holding hands and touching. Camilla's rep didn't get back to us, but sources connected with Camilla tell us they are definitely an item.
This is awesome for Tim. I couldn't think of a hotter chick to dry hump and then furiously masturbate to when she finally leaves three hours later than Camilla. I mean, seriously, does this bitch think she lives here now or something?

*30 Camilla Belle pictures total in the gallery:

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Dianna Agron at the 18th Annual Screen Actors Guild Award at The Shrine Auditorium in L.A. (1/29)

Tim Tebow is in love -- and I don't mean the platonic kind of love that one shares with the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I mean the romantic kind of love where you really want to cum inside someone else. From the New York Post:
"Glee" star Dianna Agron is in the middle of a love triangle involving actor Sebastian Stan and NFL quarterback Tim Tebow -- who just signed today with the New York Jets -- that seems straight out of a scene from the Fox hit drama series.

Blond beauty Agron, 25, has dated Stan, 28, on and off for about a year, but Tebow has told Agron that he’s smitten with her. A source told us, "Tim has made no secret that he likes Dianna, and told her so, but she has remained faithful to Sebastian."

Tebow was spotted chatting with Agron at an Oscar party in late February.
I'm very afraid for Tim Tebow, I really am. Not only was he just traded to the modern day Sodom and Gomorrah (technically East Rutherford, N.J.), but he's now working for Rex Ryan, a cheeseburger-worshiping heathen. At least our boy Timothy found a good girl like Dianna Agron to go to Mass with every day . . . and that's pretty much it. OK, I could keep going with the good Christian boy angle but, let's be serious, take a gander at Dianna for a minute. If Tebow doesn't punch that kitty harder than Mike Tyson, he needs to officially come out of the closet . . . not that there's anything wrong with that. Praise his name.

*20 Dianna Agron pictures total in the gallery:

  • Tim Tebow Dianna Agron 1
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Maria Menounos in Miami last December

Maria Menounos has a boyfriend (Kevin Undergaro), but God dammit, Tim Tebow doesn't care. He wants to tap that ass like a bottle of Communion wine. From the New York Post:
Tim Tebow was the center of attention for all the women at ESPN the Magazine's Next party in Indianapolis on Friday night. Hordes of cocktail-dress-clad ladies surrounded the Denver Bronco quarterback, angling for a personal kneeling session. But it was "Extra" host Maria Menounos who seemed to command his attention. While Tebow politely chatted with many of the girls, one source told us that "he only seemed to have eyes" for brunette beauty Menounos, who was spotted "chatting to Tebow for over an hour. It looked quite flirtatious. They were taking pictures Tebowing together." The two, along with a big group of friends, were the last to leave well after 2 a.m.
No one is surprised that Mr. Tebow finally felt the call of the pastrami pocket. If anybody can make a child of God turn his back on the Lord, it's Maria Menounos. But don't worry true believers, Saint Tim will be back to save all of us, but for now he's got a ton of sinning to do with Maria. Lots of sinning, all night sinfests. Timmy is probably in all over her face and tits, too. Just Denver one thing Timbo, having a quick release is only a benefit if you're a NFL quarterback or an NBA rapist.

*52 Maria Menounos pictures total in the gallery:

  • Maria Menounos Tim Tebow Flirting 1
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