Elisha Cuthbert and Dion Phaneuf in Maui (5/7)
NHL star and all-around douche bag Sean Avery was suspended today by commissioner Gary Bettman for basically calling his ex-girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert a whore. Cuthbert is currently dating Calgary Flames defenseman Dion Phaneuf and has also been linked to Montreal Canadians defenseman Mike Komisarek. As reporters were gathered around him in the locker room Tuesday morning, Avery said:
"I'm really happy to be back in Calgary; I love Canada. I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don't know what that's about, but enjoy the game tonight." (Source)
Sounds like Elisha gets passed around more by NHL players than the puck on a power play. Now don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with "sloppy seconds" -- my hand just had it an hour ago -- I just don't want to date a chick whose last five boyfriends have less teeth than I do . . . combined.
Mary-Kate Olsen in L.A. (10/19)
The Olsen twins love athletes. Over the last few weeks, Ashley has been seen all over New York City with cyclist Lance Armstrong. And rumor is Mary-Kate is dating New York Rangers' left winger Sean Avery. Too bad he's cheating on her. The New York Post says:
Spies said New York Ranger Sean Avery, who was introduced to Mary Kate by a mutual pal, Bungalow 8 owner Amy Sacco, has a straying eye and, behind Mary-Kate's back, has been seeing his ex- flame, Lake Bell, as well. Avery is not known for his gentlemanly ways; after his split from Elisha Cuthbert, he went around telling everyone he dumped the actress, not the other way around. (Source)
How do you possibly go from Elisha Cuthbert (and Rachel Hunter) to Mary-Kate Olsen? Isn't that like trading in a Ferrari for a unicycle with a flat tire? I'll give the guy a break though--he is a professional hockey player. Guy's taken more hits than a Google search for Britney Spears' vagina. Which reminds me: What's the difference between Mary-Kate Olsen and a hockey stick? The hockey stick has at least ONE curve--and bigger tits.
