Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Johansson on the set of Captain America: The Winter Soldier in L.A. (4/23)

*20 Scarlett Johansson Black Widow pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson and Romain Dauriac in the East Village of Manhattan (2/19)

While out with her boyfriend, French journalist Romain Dauriac, earlier this week in New York, Scarlett Johansson was seen sporting a huge diamond on her finger, leading many to believe that Romain proposed to her and the two are engaged. Or maybe Romain's the head of a violent international gang of diamond thieves and he's just using Scarlett to steal rings from mom-and-pop-run jewelry stores struggling to make ends meet. Yeah, let's go with that.

*21 Scarlett Johansson and Romain Dauriac pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson's new tattoo

Scarlett Johansson has a new tattoo. While in Paris over the weekend, she got a horseshoe with the words "Lucky You" around it. "Actually, horseshoes isn't so much about luck as it is about the proper throwing form, which can be developed through practice and repetition," said the guy who totally misses the point.

*5 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson out and about in New York (10/17)

The newly-single Scarlett Johansson has made an appearance. She was spotted picking up some takeout food yesterday in New York -- SOMETHING SHE NEVER DID WHEN SHE WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP. It's heartbreaking to see what's happening to her. Hopefully she can snap out of this downward obesity spiral before she eats herself to death.

*30 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson at Tod's party during Paris Fashion Week (10/1)

Scarlett Johansson is single again. After dating for the past eight months or so, she and boyfriend Nate Naylor have split up. Probably because he's a pussy. From the Daily Mail:

Sultry Hollywood actress Scarlett Johansson has broken up with her boyfriend Nate Naylor.

The 27-year-old Lost In Translation star, left, met the dashing advertising executive in January - after splitting up with  52-year-old actor Sean Penn - and the romance progressed quickly, with Nate, 38, all but moving into her Manhattan apartment. But last month she was pictured cuddling up to and holding hands with her ex-boyfriend, actor Jared Leto, 40, during a speech at a political rally in North Carolina.

"They never officially lived together, but Nate has moved all of his stuff out and back into his apartment," says a source. "The relationship is over. It has not been amicable."

My friends, I know what this looks like, but let me assure you that Scarlett is not -- I repeat NOT -- in Jennifer Love Hewitt Land. I know, there are certainly many similarities, but the story is in the differences. Here are some examples for your viewing pleasures: Both are butterfaces; both have supernaturally spectacular tits; both were hotter a few years ago than they are now; and both like to go slumming when looking for Mr. Goodbar. The differences? Scarlett at least tries to dress like a woman, whereas Jennifer is in full Larry David frump mode. Scarlett still has a chance to pull out of this tailspin, but if we see her pumping her own gas wearing flip flops and a sweatsuit from the 1970's, then we can consider her a lost cause.

*15 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson on the set of Don Jon's Addiction in Hackensack, New Jersey (6/27)

Scarlett Johansson has stopped using a cell phone because she doesn't want someone to hack into it again and steal her nude pics. Hmmm, it seems like there's an easier solution than that . . . oh yeah: stop taking nude pictures of yourself with your cell phone. Via the New York Post:

Phone-hacking victim Scarlett Johansson has been so scarred by the privacy invasion, that she's ditched virtually all technology and fears she's being watched all the time, a published report said today. The 27-year-old actress' borderline paranoia has even forced her boyfriend, ad executive Nate Naylor, to go through a third party to reach her, Star magazine reported.

"She has everyone, including her boyfriend Nate Naylor, contacting her through her assistant," a source close to the actress told the mag. "It's really awkward but for now he's going along with it. She thinks people are constantly spying on her. It's gotten to the point where she doesn't trust any technology."

Did I miss something? Leaked nude pictures are exactly the sort of thing that Scarlett's career needs right now. Sorry, ScarJo, but the possibility of seeing more nudes of you is keeping your name in circulation, not your scary talent. This Bourne Supremacy fantasy you're living out isn't gonna help you. To prevent any more "hacking," you should use a harder password than "BIG TITTIES" to encrypt your phone. Any idiot could have guessed that one. Believe me, those are the only two words that come to mind when anyone thinks of you.

*10 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson in Italy (7/9)

Flynet says Scarlett Johansson may have found a new love interest after she was spotted on a yacht yesterday in the Taormina Sea with a "big, muscly, mystery man who couldn't seem to take his eyes off of her." OK. Yeah. Sure. Possibly. Or maybe he's just waiting to see if she's gonna eat that booger she just picked?

*33 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson out and about in New York (5/29)

What is it about Scarlett Johansson that draws the pussies of the dating world to her like moths to a flame, or Kirstie Alley to burgers with the word "triple" in their name? She needs to date a lumberjack or something. From the National Enquirer:

Scarlett Johansson's new man, Nate Taylor, is no superhero! The Avengers star and her boyfriend recently attempted to enjoy and evening at hip New York nightclub The Electric Room, but an out-of-control male fan upset the A-list actress.

"He just kept throwing his body toward her, dancing wildly, trying to talk to her and get her attention," an onlooker tells Star magazine. "He was relentless!" The 27 year-old actress was "visibly frustrated," but Nate, 38, "watched like a deer in headlights," the source reveals. Finally, Scarlett, in true Avenger form, "jumped up and alerted security, who built a wall of buff bouncers between the sexy movie actress and the threatening fan." (Print Edition - 6/15)

Scarlett Johansson is gonna have to make a decision soon. She's either gonna be with a mamma's boy who looks like he can handle himself like Ryan Reynolds, or be with a true sociopath like Sean Penn. There's no middle ground in Tinseltown, which is sad to say, but that's why guys like me are in such demand. I'm the definition of a man's man, Scarlett. I'll choke out any dancing bear that even slightly annoys you, and my oral skills have been favorably compared to prison lesbians. Do I make movies? No. But I'm perfectly willing to bring a camera phone to bed, just give us a chance, baby.

*13 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Busy Philipps bikini pics!

Here's some pics of Busy Philipps in a bikini over the weekend in Montecito (a few miles south of Santa Barbara). She was in town for Drew Barrymore's wedding (Scarlett Johansson was, too, but the pics of her in the gallery suck). Is it just me, or did Busy put on some weight (compared to these pics of her last year)? Kind of an ironic first name, if you think about it. "Static" Philipps is more like it.

*15 Busy Philipps bikini pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson getting a star on The Hollywood Walk of Fame (5/2)

Apparently Kristen Stewart is worried that her boyfriend Robert Pattinson is going to fall for Scarlett Johansson (he's close to signing on to co-star with her in the film Hate Mail). Well, duh. That may be the first rational thought in the history of Kristen's brain. From the Chicago Sun Times:

[Robert's] girlfriend and "Twilight" co-star Kristen Stewart is none too happy. Apparently, Stewart has heard one too many tales about Johansson's rumored "maneather" reputation — for allegedly being too chummy with guys with whom she's made movies.

After doing all she could to kibosh tales about the Pattinson romance everyone knew was going on, Stewart only recently slipped and called Pattinson "my boyfriend" in an interview. Supposedly, Stewart is very possessive when it comes to her longtime beau. Pattinson himself is said to be laughing all this off — noting he has worked with many gorgeous women without falling in love, including Reese Witherspoon in "Water For Elephants."

On one hand, the world famous, 100% A-lister supreme, piece of ass -- and the best set of tits this side of Sofia Vergara: Miss Scarlett Johansson. On the other, the most disinterested, stoned-looking actress of all time (who isn't purposely playing a cadaver): Kristen Stewart. I wonder if Bobby will bone Scarlett? LOL, I'm kidding. Of course he will. How could he not? It's Scarlett Fucking Johansson. Robert has the responsibility -- no, the duty -- to ride that lil' filly hard and put her down wet for all of us. Should he not accept this mission, all knowledge of Pattinson's heterosexuality will be disavowed.

*25 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery: