Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Johansson at the "Runway To Win Fundraiser for the Obama Victory Fund" at the Theory Store in the Meatpacking District of Manhattan (2/7)

*11 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

London calling for Scarlett Johansson?

Scarlett Johansson supposedly wants to buy a place in London to get away from her ex-husband Ryan Reynolds and his girlfriend Blake Lively. Oh, great. I've always said that the only thing Scarlett's missing is one of those fake English accents like Dumb and Dumber (Madonna and Gwyneth Paltrow). From the Daily Mail:

Sources say the Hollywood pin-up, 27, who divorced the Canadian actor last summer, was in the capital last week and visited an estate agent to help with her search for an apartment.

"Scarlett doesn’t want any awkward run-ins with Ryan and Blake in New York," says a friend. "She was always a little uncomfortable about the fact that Ryan and Blake worked together while she was still married to him. When Scarlett is in New York she keeps a low profile. She wants to give the whole party scene a miss. She’s filming a movie called Under The Skin in Scotland at the moment but she is hoping to meet someone new. She adores British men and would love a place and a man in London."

Wait, New York City is too small to share for Scarlett? Wow, someone sure has a high opinion of herself since leaking those naked pics a few months ago . . . or is it something else? In all honesty, Scarlett isn't worried about running into Ryan 8 Pack and the DNA Dump -- she's looking for her next Sean Penn. And since Michael Moore is married, she needs to move across the pond to find another know-it-all liberal commie douche with no abs who hates America.

*15 Scarlett Johansson pics total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson outside the Ed Sullivan Theater last month

Does Scarlett Johansson hate her mom, Melanie Sloan? Yes, I think it's quite clear that she does. From the New York Post:

Scarlett Johansson is denying reports that she and her mom, Melanie Sloan, are at odds over money and Sloan’s current partner, Gilles Arondeau. The reports came from other news outlets after The Post revealed on Sunday that Sloan is suing for the return of a $130,000 deposit she put down on a $1.4 million apartment on West 43rd Street, after she couldn’t land a mortgage.

A representative for Johansson told Page Six, "Scarlett and Melanie are as close as they have ever been. They are incredibly proud of the solid and productive professional partnership they had through the many years they worked together. Their personal relationship is solid and loving."

Awkward. Melanie Sloan is making a classic mistake made by most men and munchers. It seems as if Ms. Sloan is mistaking Scarlett's supernatural hotness for success and money. When you really think about it, Scarlett is famous for being hot and nothing more. She just got the Marvel gig, so the only other movie I can think of that was mainstream was that piece of garbage she made with young Obi-Wan Kenobi. Sorry Melanie, you're just gonna have to stay in your Jersey City 12 story walk-up studio apartment until at least Iron Man 4. That, or do you have any cell phone pics of your daughter you're willing to part with? Sounds like you need a little extra scratch.

*12 pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Johansson at the New York premiere of We Bought a Zoo at the Ziegfeld Theater (12/12)

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Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds on the set of R.I.P.D. in Boston (10/23)

OK, that headline may be a bit dramatic, but I bet if Scarlett Johansson ever ends up behind bars with Blake Lively, she at least tries to shank her with a rusty spoon. From Us Weekly:

A source tells the new issue of Us Weekly that Scarlett Johansson is fuming that her ex-husband, Ryan Reynolds, has moved on with Gossip Girl's Blake Lively -- even though Johansson ended their two-year marriage one year ago.

"Scarlett is pissed that he's not under her spell anymore," the source tells Us. "She realized what a great catch Ryan was .. Ryan would have gotten back with her. He was so totally in love, but then she flaunted Sean [Penn] right after their split, and he was done."

Adding insult to injury for the Iron Man actress? Lively, 24, is sticking around as things get more serious with Reynolds.

"Things are great [for Blake and Ryan]," says the source. "They haven't had a fight yet!"

Oh no, I never thought I'd see Scarlett Johansson do the grovel-walk of shame so early in her career (I'm looking right at you, Demi Moore). It appears that Agent Romanov found out the hard way that no aging commie douche-nozzle (aka Sean Penn) can satisfy you as well as an 8-pack of smarmy Canadian steel (aka Ryan Reynolds). Who says that Canadians aren't worth conquering? Well, myself and Scarlett Johanssen, apparently.

*11 Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson in the December issue of Interview magazine

Scarlett Johansson has finally figured out how the whole Occupy Wall Street movement can have a real impact on our country. Or at least she certainly thinks she has. It's so cute when celebrities think they know what the fuck they're talking about! From her interview with Interview magazine (yes, that actually exists):

"You know, if Occupy Wall Street was actually a march, and people from all around the country could collect and march toward Washington, D.C., as part of this massive movement of people... I think that kind of pressure is more powerful than a sit-in that seems a little more unorganized.

"I do feel positive about what's happening. I think that with all these movements, and this growing collective voice that's emerging, people are starting to come out of the kind of dazed state they were in for so many years."

Awe, isn't that just the most precious thing ever? The china doll wants to put on a pantsuit and do some head scratchin'. It's nice to see a broad pretending to play politics, but just like children, Scarlett Johansson should be seen and not heard. The ex Mrs. Ryan Reynolds' time would be better spent fussing over dresses or keeping her make-up tidy instead of wasting it via worrying about things that go above her head (i.e., men's work). Scarlett, I say this with all due respect: when I need to know you opinion, I'll look at your nude pics. Now be a dear and go wait in the car.

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Scarlett Johansson addresses nude pic scandal

In the new issue of Vanity Fair, Scarlett Johansson opens up about those nude pics of hers that leaked to the web a few months ago, and how they were specifically for her husband at the time, Ryan Reynolds . . . whore!:

Scarlett Johansson does not seem the least bit ashamed when discussing her recent nude-photo scandal with Vanity Fair contributing editor Peter Biskind. "I know my best angles," she says with her trademark insouciance.

Insouciance? Seriously, fuck you Vanity Fair.

"They were sent to my husband," now ex Ryan Reynolds. "There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s not like I was shooting a porno." She adds saucily, "Although there’s nothing wrong with that either."

Interestingly, in the interview Scarlett didn't address how her email account was "hacked" and the nude pics stolen because the "hacker" simply guessed her password. Seriously woman, would it kill you to mix in a number or uppercase letter?

*10 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Tuesday, October 4

Scarlett Johansson leaving an event supporting Mayoral candidate Scott Stringer in New York (pics start here)

Dulé Hill on the set of Psych in Vancouver (pics start here)

Australian singer Delta Goodrem leaving Runyon Canyon in Hollywood after a hike (pics start here)

Evangeline Lilly at the premiere of Real Steel at the Gibson Amphitheater in Universal City (pics start here)

Amy Smart at a gas station in Hollywood (pics start here)

Miranda Kerr arriving to the Stella McCartney Spring/Summer 2012 fashion show during Paris Fashion Week (pics start here)

Jessica Alba out and about in Santa Monica (pics start here)

Gwen Stefani leaving a dentist's office in London (pics start here)

Kim Kardashian arriving back at the Gansevoort Hotel in New York (pics start here)

Laura Dern leaving her hotel in New York (pics start here)

LeAnn Rimes arriving for a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Kristin Cavallari backstage at Dancing with the Stars studio in Hollywood (pics start here)

Reese Witherspoon shopping in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Brooke Burke and her daughter Neriah Fisher shopping in Santa Monica (pics start here)

*125 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson on the set of The Avengers in Manhattan (9/3)

What's better than having sex with Jessica Biel? Having sex with Jessica Biel and Scarlett Johansson. Screw you Justin Timberlake. From Us Weekly:

Justin Timberlake spent the night of Sept. 14 with single-again Scarlett Johansson, the new Us Weekly reports. Timberlake and Johansson were "hardcore flirting" during a raucous evening at NYC hotspot 1Oak, a witness tells Us. "Other guys were trying to talk with Scarlett, but she was only focused on Justin."

The duo left at 5:30 a.m. and got pizza next door, the source says. The one-on-one party continued just a few hours after the A-listers closed down 1Oak -- when Timberlake showed up at the actress' midtown penthouse apartment. Greeting the doorman and introducing himself as "Justin," Timberlake "wasn't even low-key" about his visit, another witness noted.

"They've hooked up several times over the years," a pal confirms of the pair. But Timberlake just got back together with longtime love Jessica Biel merely a month ago. "For the moment, she's trusting him."

I think it's starting to become clear who's been "hacking" into all of these celebrities phones lately. First Justin is rumored to have been hooking up with Mila Kunis, and weeks later racy pictures of her are leaked onto the internet. Then, last week he's seen with Scarlett Johansson and nude pics of HER surface. I think there's one thing that can obviously be said about all of this: Justin, will you please start dating Sofia Vergara or Alessandra Ambrosio?

*26 Scarlett Johansson pictures total in the gallery:

Scarlett Johansson nude pics leaked to the internets

Why does everyone in Hollywood take naked pictures of themselves? I don't know, but I'm not complaining. Because some hacker/hero leaked nude pics of Scarlett Johansson to the internets this morning. And the FBI is already on the case (which means they're probably real). TMZ says:

Sources connected with Scarlett tell us ... the FBI will be contacted this morning because they believe this is a criminal act. The FBI has been involved in several celebrity nude photo hacking situations in the past year -- involving Vanessa Hudgens, Jessica Alba and more.

Wow, what a fun day to be an FBI agent: "Bill, I got two cases for you. A triple murder down in Long Beach or you can look at Scarlett Johansson's tits. Which one do you want?"

NOTE: Uncensored pics HERE, HERE, HERE, and HERE (NSFW)

*8 Scarlett Johansson hacked pictures total in the gallery: