Ryan Seacrest and Shayna Taylor shopping in St Jean Cap Ferrat, France (8/20)
Ryan Seacrest's girlfriend Shayna Taylor may have had a great time vacationing with him in Europe over the summer, but an insider tells the National Enquirer that the trick-ass bitch has no chance. Well they don't use those words exactly, but that's what they mean:
"He has fun taking her on lavish vacations, but when it comes to his daily life, she's not that big a part of it," says the insider. "His work is everything to him ... Ryan gets bored quickly. Sometimes he acts like he wants to settle down and start a family, nut no one believes he ever really will. Shayna may thing she can change him, but it's only a matter of time before he kicks her to the curb too." (Print Edition)
Sorry ladies, you're never really ever gonna be able to "change" Ryan unless you learn how to pee standing up. The real reason why this guy moves from one lady to the next is not because he gets "bored," but because his adam's apple is bigger than theirs. Sure, it's probably nice to sample some of the world's finest ass, but there's really only one kind of ass he's interested in -- hairy.
*20 Ryan Seacrest and Shayne Taylor pictures total in the gallery:
Ryan Seacrest and Dominique Piek on their way to Club 55 in St. Tropez (6/30)
I made a smart ass joke last week about how a post-breakup Ryan Seacrest was allegedly running through all kinds of women, even though no one had actually seen him with another woman. Well there he is over the weekend in St. Tropez. with his rumored new girlfriend, South African model Dominique Piek. Clearly he reads Celebslam, and clearly he just told me to go fuck myself. Touche, Ryan. Touche.
*15 Ryan Seacrest and Dominique Piek pictures total in the gallery:
Ryan Seacrest departing on a flight at LAX airport (5/22)
Ryan Seacrest has been pretty quiet since his contract ran out with breaking up with Julianne Hough, but the New York Daily News says he's hooking up with a ton of chicks. Riiiiiiiiiiight.
Newly single Ryan Seacrest is playing the field. The E! host, in addition to his 432 other jobs, was at Summer Sessions, a weekly Sunday night party in Los Angeles, flirting up a storm. "He took a hot new blond out for the night, but then he was overheard bragging to his friends about how awesome it is to be single," one spywitness tells Confidenti@l. Julianne Hough, meanwhile, hit Monday night's live finale of "The Voice" with her nieces.
Oh yeah, I'm sure Ryan is really plowing through a ocean of hot women because, you know, he loves the pussy. Ryan is also a bullfighter, a part time old school beat cop, and I'm even hearing that he's joining the war effort too, so with your support he'll give those damn Nazis hell. Does that cover it, Ryan's publicist? It's not 1955 anymore, there's no need for a Rock Hudsonesque full court press to rescue his image. Ryan could do the American Idol intro with Adam Lambert's diarrhea running out of his zipper, and America wouldn't care. It's not as if the little fella is a leading man or anything -- he's basically Casey Kasem without the edge. There's no need to save something that was never there to begin with.
Julianne Hough and Ryan Seacrest in St. Barts in 2011
I hope Julianne Hough enjoyed the lavish, free vacations while they lasted, because People says she and boyfriend Ryan Seacrest have split up:
After dating for more than two years, Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough have decided to take a break and are living apart, sources close to the couple confirm to PEOPLE. The sources maintain that busy work schedules proved to be a great challenge for them both, although they are still in regular contact and remain friends.
Since Ryan is worth 100x what Julianne's worth, he obviously dumped her. And I can't help but think he's gonna regret it. For example, who's gonna kill the spiders that crawl into his living room now? Eeeeeeek!
*20 Julianne Hough and Ryan Seacrest pictures total in the gallery:
Julianne Hough and Ryan Seacrest in St. Barts last year
If this story from the National Enquireris to be believed, Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough are *this* close to getting married. I thought that was illegal in California? . . . wait, Ryan would be marrying Julianne? Oh.
"Ryan was sitting on the fence about when to pop the question until Julianne started talking about her sexy scenes [in Rock of Ages] with Tom [Cruise]," a longtime pal of the Hollywood dynamo tells EnquirerPlus. "Now he's finally ready to put a rind on it!"
... in recent interviews, [Julianne] began gushing about working with Tom, who plays sexy rock god Stacee Jaxx in the film. "I have to say, [I] think he's way more hot now," she said, revealing that one of their scenes was so steamy it got cut from the film. "It was in the strip club, and I game Tom a lap dance," she said. The source points out: "That was all Ryan had to hear! After that, he declared that he was going to make Julianne his bride. They'll be hitched by Christmas."
Poor Julianne, she still thinks Ryan is gonna marry her? Honey, just move on, Ryan isn't the marrying type. He might be what they would have called a "confirmed bachelor" in the good ol' days. Of course, the "good ol' days" being back when you could call a dude a homo and get away with it. I'm not saying that he is, but it makes me feel better to say it since he's banging that piece of ass Julianne Hough. Seriously, I would give my left nut just to sign her yearbook.
*25 Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough pictures total in the gallery:
Sacha Baron Cohen dumps King Jong-il's ashes on Ryan Seacrest
As part of a stunt to promote his new film The Dictator, Sacha Baron Cohen dumped "Kim Jong-il's" ashes on Ryan Seacrest on the red carpet at last night's Academy Awards (it was rumored earlier in the week that Cohen was banned from the ceremony, but he was granted permission on Friday to attend in costume). According to Seacrest, it was the first time since college that he had an Asian dude all over his chest.
Former Dancing with the Stars' pro Julianne Hough was hacked. The infamous "Hollywood Leaks" group cracked her phone and leaked a bunch of personal pictures to the internets. There's nothing dirty, unfortunately (this pic is about as risqué as it gets). A lot of Julianne on vacation with boyfriend Ryan Seacrest. Dinner at gourmet restaurants. On a yacht. At the beach. Snowboarding. Basically, this hacking is a great way to feel really depressed about how ordinary your life is. FML.
*100 Julianne Hough hacked pictures total in the gallery:
Gee, who could have foreseen that JLo would be anything but a pleasure and joy to work with on the set of American Idol? Oh yeah, that's right, everyone. From the National Enquirer:
Jennifer Lopez and Ryan Seacrest are heading for a bitter showdown over their "American Idol" paychecks, sources tell The Enquirer. Ryan banks $15 million a year, while J.Lo ka-chinged a $12 million package for her first season on the hit show. But the money-savvy diva, 41, has shrewdly negotiated a pay raise for herself every time Ryan, 35, gets a salary boost, and the "Idol" host is livid, insiders say.
"Ryan hasn't confronted J.Lo, but when he heard that her future raises are tied to his raises, he was furious," and insider divulged. "Basically, her contracts are hard wired so that when Ryan makes more money, she'll make more money. He doesn't like his salary being dragged into her contract negotiations, and he's upset about her tactics."
Since J.Lo's salary is linked to his, it may be more difficult for Ryan to get a raise in the future than it would be otherwise. As the Enquirer has reported, Ryan and Jennifer were recently forced to deny widespread reports that they were feuding even before the show began. But their rivalry is very real- and long-standing, said another source connected to the show. "As far as Jenny and her people are concerned, there's no question she is the bigger star," said the source.
JLo's people think "there's no question she is the bigger star" of the two? Then why is she making $3 million less per year? The only thing bigger about JLo is her ass. These two should just settle their disagreement once and for all the way all Hollywood divas do: with a cat fight. Of course, if these two did get into a tussle, you'd have to think that Ryan would be at a distinct disadvantage: JLo would throw haymakers and he'd try to pull her hair. *25 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:
Congrats to Ryan Seacrest's penis. It must feel like it just won the lottery. Dammit she's hot. From Us Weekly:
On Sunday, she was photographed walking arm-in-arm with American Idol host Ryan Seacrest, fueling rumors the two are an item. (pic here)
They've also been spotted getting cozy a lot lately. On May 18, they enjoyed a dinner date at Los Angeles seafood restaurant Providence. "They were really cuddly and cute ... and kissed a few times," a witness tells UsMagazine.com.
They also hit a post-CMT Music Awards bash last week in Nashville.
Says a source: "Julianne says Ryan is so nice. They hardly ever see each other because they are both so busy, but they've been on a few dates. He's really sweet to her, but it is certainly not serious."
Well excuse me Mr. Certainly Not Serious. It certainly seemed serious the other night when I was hiding naked in Julianne's crawl space taking secret pictures of you two. Hah! I just busted you Ryan!