Rehab

David Arquette is in rehab

David Arquette -- fresh off his split from Courteney Cox -- is in rehab. What a party pooper. No one likes a quitter, David. From People:

"I really admire David and his choice to take charge and better his life," [Courteney Cox], tells PEOPLE. "I love and support him."

Arquette who separated from Cox in October and is dad to their 6-year-old daughter Coco, has been having trouble managing the separation, one source told PEOPLE recently. "He's just not handling this situation well," the source said. "He's really depressed."

So we're supposed to believe that David entered a drug and alcohol treatment center, not for a drug and alcohol problem, but because he was feeling a bit gloomy? Jesus, why not just say he went to the Moon? I could come up with a better excuse in 2 minutes using just a Boggle cube. I'll even let you shake it.

*18 David Arquette pictures total in the gallery:

Pure class, that Shauna Sand

I didn't even know Shauna had a drinking problem. Maybe she's seeking help for her addiction to lucite? From TMZ:

Shauna Sand's penchant for booze and attention has finally paid off -- TMZ has learned the former Playboy Playmate has signed on for the next season of "Celebrity Rehab."

We're told Shauna will check into Dr. Drew's famous recovery center in Pasadena [today].

As we previously reported, the show has already lined up several other minor celebs including Tila Tequila and Jason Wahler.

Shauna Sand and Tila Tequila living under the same roof? That's not a reality show, that's a health crisis. Fuck the oil spill, President Obama needs to put a stop to this. Send in the National Guard or something . . .  on second thought, maybe we should keep the men in uniform away from Shauna and Tila. Iraq was hard enough on those guys.

HOW 99% OF CONVERSATIONS BETWEEN TILA TEQUILA AND SHAUNA SAND WILL START: "After I got my last abortion, . . ."

*23 pics total in the gallery: 

Tila Tequila at her album release party at the Conga Room in L.A. (5/12)

Tila Tequila's going to rehab. But not private rehab that actually has a chance of working and making her a healthier human-being/midget-alien-hybrid -- I mean Celebrity Rehab, the show that nobody watches. From TMZ:

Tila Tequila is finally seeking professional help -- TMZ has confirmed nthrough multiple sources that the bisexual reality star has committed to do the next season of VH1's "Celebrity Rehab" ... if it doesn't get canceled first.

It's unclear what personal demon Tila will try to conquer with the help of Dr. Drew -- but it certainly won't be her addiction to attention.

But there's one major catch -- as we previously reported -- VH1 is having problems finding other "celebrities" to rehabilitate ... and if they don't find a cast quick, the show could be killed. So far, no word on who else the show has its sights set on.

Appearing on national television isn't going to cure Tila of her most glaring addiction -- attention. If Tila really wanted to be cured, she'd find a tiny room, keep to herself, and avoid all contact with the outside world. I'd recommend she start with something like this . . . or as I like to call it, "The Simon Monjack Suite."

*32 pics total in the gallery:

Jonathan Rhys Meyers out and about in New York (5/6)

Jonathan Rhys Meyers is entering rehab in London. For the fourth time. Meyers made a drunken scene earlier this month in the first class lounge at New York's JFK airport that resulted in him being banned from United Airlines. Apparently they don't like when you drop the N bomb on their employees:

RadarOnline is exclusively reporting that the ... when airline workers noticed the actor drinking and getting out of control they prevented him from boarding the flight to Los Angeles, a source at the airport told us.

As the incident unfolded, Meyers, growing furious, flung the 'N' word, the source told RadarOnline.com exclusively. He had been drinking vodka and it was before 7 am. It is unclear if the actor was directing the word toward an individual or just spewing it without a specific target.

As for his rehab stay, a source told People:

"He just really wants to get better. This has been an ongoing battle for him."

The actor's rep confirms to People that he is again seeking treatment for his addiction, but declined further comment.

Cool, I didn't know they had rehab for racism. Hopefully it works out for him. It does seem like a much better solution to get Jonathan to stop dropping the N bomb on people is to get some huge scary black dude to beat the living shit out of him. Let's see what he yells at an innocent airline employee the next time he gets drunk when visions of Rampage Jackson breaking his jaw are dancing through his head.

*5 pics total in the gallery: