Reggie Bush

Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian in 2009

Kris Jenner actually pressured Reggie Bush to call his ex/her daughter, Kim Kardashian, on the night of her wedding to boost ratings for the special that ran on E!. Wow. Despite that, Reggie's still thinking about getting back together with Kim. Run Reggie. Run as far away from this family as you can, Forrest Gump style. A source told the National Enquirer:

"Reggie would take Kim back, but he's making it absolutely clear he doesn't want their romance to appear on her show. He refuses to have the cameras follow his every step with Kim and record their private conversations."

Reggie, who plays for the Miami Dolphins, has already butted heads with Kim's mother/manager Kris Jenner over her request that he phone Kim the night of her wedding, which was filmed for a two-part special on the E! network, according to the source. "Kris wanted to have Reggie call Kim for ratings," the source revealed, "He wouldn't do it." (Print Edition - 12/12)

So Kris Jenner was trying to pimp her daughter to another man on her wedding day for the sake of ratings? This, my friends, is what I call par for the course. Nothing about these slugs shocks me anymore. It wouldn't surprise me if it were to come out that Kris was holding the camera during Kim's interracial porno with Moesha's less-talented little brother. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't bet against Kris tongue-polishing Reggie Bush's cervix-smasher before he plows into fatty if it meant getting a mention on TMZ TV. Wow, who would have thought that Robert Kardashian would be the one with at least a shred of dignity in this family?

*5 Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian in 2008

Could Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian be reuniting? Honestly, if that's a question that's keeping you up at night, just go ahead and kill yourself right now. A "Kardashian family friend" told Life & Style:

"Reggie reached out to Kim via text shortly after she announced she was filing for divorce to make sure she was okay. They've stayed in touch ever since, texting and talking. Kim was Reggie's first love. He knows she's hurting right now, but when the time is right, he'll swoop in and take care of her.

"He's concerned about her; he's making sure she's holding it together. Reggie always knew that it wasn't going to work [between Kim and Kris], so he's been waiting and watching."

Reggie Bush was fatty's first love? Good lord in heaven, if William Ray Norwood Jr's pee didn't win this classy little filly's heart, then I can only imagine what act elevated Reggie into being Kim's knight in shining armor (my guess is a hot carl or possibly a rusty tromblumpkin).

It really must suck when people like Jenna Jameson and Ray Lewis look at you with disgust. When a semen mop and an ALLEGED murderer (charges were pleaded down after Ray ratted on his friends) can look down their noses at you, then you've hit rock bottom . Nevertheless, Kim and Reggie deserve each other. They both did things that *technically* may not be illegal, but are definitely immoral.

*10 Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush pictures total in the gallery:

Kim Kardashian out and about in L.A. (8/9)

Reggie Bush - who may or may not have given Kim Kardashian an STD back in 2009 - still wants his old girlfriend back. And he's definitely not above sending her awkward text messages and voice mails to drive home his point. An insider told Life & Style:

"He’s been sending text messages to Kim and leaving her voice mails, telling her she’s making a mistake and that he’s the one for her. In the past, Kim was friendly to Reggie but now she’s stopped responding ... He was begging her to call off the wedding — and give him another chance."

Reggie’s been texting Kim using a special nickname they’ve always kept as a secret between the two of them. "She used to love that nickname," Kim’s pal reveals, "but now that he’s using it when she’s about to get married to someone else, it’s just annoying to her." The pal adds, "She was burned by the end of their relationship, and she’s truly moved on."

If Reggie has a problem with Kim getting married to Kris, rather than continuing to text her, he should just be a man and leave her alone stand up at the wedding when the priest asks if anyone objects. He's an NFL football player -- who's going to stop him? The only people that would be able to take him down would be the Heisman Trophy Trust or Khloe.

Speaking of Khloe -- sleeper pick in fantasy football this season. If you can get her in the 15th round or lower, that's good value.

*10 Kim Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

Melissa Molinaro leaving BOA Steakhouse in West Hollywood (6/3)

No Kim Kardashian did not dump Kris Humphries to date Reggie Bush again. Reggie's just dating a Kim lookalike . . . minus the ass. From Popeater:

The stunner on Bush's arm is Melissa Molinaro, an actress trying to make it in the business with a little help from her Kardashian-like looks. Molinaro's highest publicity gig so far was the Old Navy commercial spot that had many doing a double take, wondering if the Kardashian clan's queen bee was the newest face of the affordable brand.

Bush even celebrated the Molinaro's birthday with the famous Armenian-American impersonator earlier this month at Beverly Hills' Boa Steakhouse.

If the guy has a particular taste in women, can you really blame him for going after a girl that's his "type"? At least with this chick, Reggie doesn't have to keep reminding himself that millions of other dudes have seen her naked or that he'll have to buy toilet paper by the pallet. Of course, there is one thing that this chick presumably won't have that Kim does: media attention a Sasquatch look-a-like for a sister an AVN Award.

*20 Melissa Molinaro pictures total in the gallery:

Rihanna leaving the Mein Schiff 2 cruise ship in Hamburg, Germany (5/9)

So I guess Rihanna is dating Reggie Bush now. That dirty slut! From the Chicago Sun Times:

While things are heating up between Rihanna and Reggie Bush, the NFL star reportedly is worried about all the press attention the duo will attract — similar to his previous relationship with Kim Kardashian.

Why is this guy worried about the "press attention"? He used to date Kim Kardashian. If he could put up with that publicity whore, he can certainly put up with whatever press Rihanna generates. Besides, making sure his relationship with Rihanna stays out of the limelight should be easy for Reggie. All he has to do is use an open palm -- those things rarely leave bruises.

*15 Rihanna pictures total in the gallery:

Mayra Veronica in all her glory

Apparently Kim Kardashian -- who Reggie Bush dated for over two years without popping the question to -- is a little angry with her ex-boyfriend for proposing to his new girlfriend Mayra Veronica after just six months of dating. Hmmm, maybe it's because she never profited from a graphic sex tape featuring her and an ex-boyfriend? Maybe that's why Kim. From the Chicago Sun Times:

Kim Kardashian’s on-again, off-again romance with Reggie Bush ended earlier this year, but the reality star and merchandising maven is said to be very upset about the New Orleans Saints player apparently becoming engaged to her look-alike — Cuban model and singer Mayra Veronica — after only six months of dating. Veronica is sporting quite the sparkler, said to be “a friendship ring.”

Some friendship!

A longtime Kardashian insider said Monday, “Kim is one of those people who can’t stand someone having something she wanted — even after she no longer wants it. It’s weird, but she’s obsessive that way. Go figure."

Why does Kim care who Reggie's banging? Is she surprised that a world champion athlete worth millions of dollars has been able to move on to another floozy? Sorry Kim, if you don't want your ex-boyfriend moving on to another piece of ass, you're going to have to date someone no other women are interested in. I'd recommend a gossip blogger.

I'm so lonely.

*11 Mayra Veronica pictures total in the gallery: 

Kim Kardashian arriving to Bobby McCray & Khadijah Haqq's wedding in Los Angeles (7/17)

Reggie Bush can't stop obsessing over his beautiful and talented ex-girlfriend Kim Kardashian, so claims this article from Life & Style planted by Kim's grandma or publicist:

Life & Style has learned that since Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian called it quits back in March, he’s been desperate to contact the reality star. "Reggie realized Kim was the one and said he was finally ready to get married," an insider tells Life & Style. "But after months of being single, Kim’s realized Reggie wasn’t the one, and now she’s moved on." In fact, Kim is happier than ever with new beau, Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Miles Austin.

"Ever since Reggie found out about Miles, he’s been going crazy sending Kim lots of nasty e-mails. She just ignores them," the insider continues. "Reggie has unsuccessfully tried to reach out to Miles. Kim always intended on staying friends with Reggie — but now he doesn’t want to let her move on."

If we're supposed to believe that a Super Bowl champion, Heisman Trophy-winning, professional football-playing multimillionaire is sitting around obsessing about what his ex is doing, forget it. At this stage in his life, the only thing Reggie's obsessing over is whether the 5,000 condoms he's thrown into the toilet in the past month are going to clog his plumbing. Trust me Reggie, anything over ~3,500 will. I know, from experience.*

*no, I don't. I'm so lonely.

17 photos total in the gallery:

Kim Kardashian in Miami (3/28)

The question that goes with the headline is: What broke up Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush? It was Reggie's cheating last week. This week it's Kim's infamous sex tape. From X17:

Reggie Bush ultimately dumped Kim Kardashian because of her 2007 sex tape with then-boyfriend Ray J, a source close to the couple tells X17online exclusively.

According to our source, "Reggie's mom just could not get over the fact that Kim had a sex tape. Reggie and his family are very conservative, and he told Kim that a marriage is never going to happen between them because of the tape." This is something that Kim's family has known for years, especially sisters Khloe and Kourtney.

There's a lesson to be learned here -- especially for those particularly busty young ladies thinking about making a sex tape and leaking it to the web in a desperate grasp for fame. By all means, please do it. Because there is a damn good chance you'll get to date a professional athlete for a few years. Think of all the cool shit he'll buy you! Hooray for sex tapes!

Reggie Bush is a serial-cheater

When Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush broke up last year, the rumor was that he cheated (he did). And when Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush broke up this year, I know you're not going to believe this, but the rumor is he cheated. I know, right, didn't see that one coming. From Radar:

Kim Kardashian is reeling from the apparent end of her relationship with Reggie Bush and now she’s headed for more heartbreak because a new report claims Reggie cheated on her, RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively.

Reggie spent the night at his Hollywood Hills house on March 16 with January Gessert, a blonde waitress at the Sagebrush Cantina in Calabassas, California - and there are photos to prove it! The charges and photos are in the new edition of the National Enquirer, and when a reporter approached Gessert she denied knowing Reggie. But when pressed about spending the night at his house, she said she knew him from TV!

The night in question began with Reggie and a pal at Red Rock, a bar-restaurant on Sunset Strip. Reggie and his pal were at a table with January and another woman and before long they all went back to Reggie’s house. Gessert was photographed leaving at 7 a.m.

You can't assume that this January chick slept with Reggie just because she was leaving his house early in the morning. Millionaire athletes and blonde waitresses are known for keeping their relationships platonic. Besides, the truth is that January was probably over there for an early morning prayer session -- which is why she could be heard screaming "Oh God, yes!" from inside the house.

Kim Kardashian out and about in Miami (3/22)

Radar mentioned yesterday that Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian were "headed for splitsville." It looks like their flight arrived. From E!:

Sources confirm to E! News that the reality star and her pro footballer boyfriend have split yet again. While Kim's in South Beach shooting the second season of Kourtney and Khloé Take Miami for three weeks, Reggie's been out and about on the NYC scene.

So what was the issue this time around?

Kim's fame and crazy busy schedule have been an ongoing source of conflict for the couple, who reunited last August after a quick breakup.

That last line is obviously a bunch of bullshit. Famous couples don't break up because of work -- unless it's in the context of "Kim was pissed that Reggie was getting his penis worked over on a nightly basis by random club whores." But no matter why they broke up, let's not forget that Kim and Reggie are still human beings. They're not robots -- they have emotions just like the rest of us. So until we find out the reason for the split, I think the only responsible thing to do here is to throw out wild, almost libelous speculation. I'll go first: Kim could put up with some of Reggie's likes -- Civil War action figures, miniature spoons, stamps -- but she'd simply had enough of waking up in the morning to take a shower and running into yet another underage Asian hooker sleeping in his master bathroom.