Paris Hilton


Paris Hilton bikini pics!

Here's Paris Hilton in Ibiza earlier this week. Because I care about her so much, here's a few helpful phrases for Paris to use during her vacation on the Spanish party island:

  • Hurry up and take your pants off!: "Date prisa y tomar sus pantalones!"
  • Do you sell Valtrex?: "Venden Valtrex?"
  • Don't worry, I'm not wearing panties!: "No te preocupes, yo no llevo bragas!"
  • Haven't I fucked you before?: "No he tenido relaciones sexuales con usted antes?"
  • Gross, the maid is talking to me!: "Ay, de la dama esta hablando a mí!"
*9 Paris Hilton bikini pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton Ibiza Bikini Pics 1
  • Paris Hilton Ibiza Bikini Pics 2
  • Paris Hilton Ibiza Bikini Pics 3
  • Paris Hilton Ibiza Bikini Pics 4
  • Paris Hilton Ibiza Bikini Pics 5

Paris Hilton and Tom Gross in Formentera, Spain (6/9)

Here's Paris Hilton and her new boyfriend Tom Gross on a yacht off Formentera yesterday. Gross is right. Or more like, embarrassing. Hopefully for him his friends don't start asking too many questions. "Tom, was that you kissing Paris Hilton on a yacht?" . . . "Me? Nope, not me. Not at all. I was in Bangkok fucking ladyboys. Fucked 'em real good."

*35 Paris Hilton pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton New Boyfriend Yacht 1
  • Paris Hilton New Boyfriend Yacht 2
  • Paris Hilton New Boyfriend Yacht 3
  • Paris Hilton New Boyfriend Yacht 4
  • Paris Hilton New Boyfriend Yacht 5
  • Paris Hilton New Boyfriend Yacht 6
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  • Paris Hilton New Boyfriend Yacht 30

Paparazzi photos from Saturday, June 6, and Sunday, June 7

Paris Hilton and Nicky Hilton hosting The Ultimate Bachelorette Party at Wall Lounge at the W Hotel in Miami (pics start here)

Kate Upton on the set of The Layover in St. Louis (pics start here)

Jessica Hart out and about in New York (pics start here)

Vanessa Hudgens out and about in New York (pics start here)

Ashley Grenee leaving Bristol Farms in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Kate Hudson out and about in New York (pics start here)

Rihanna leaving Game nightclub in New York (pics start here)

Gwen Stefani heading to the NBCUniversal building in Universal City (pics start here)

Iggy Azalea horseback riding in Calabasas (pics start here)

Kevin Bacon out for lunch in Hollywood (pics start here)

Kelly Clarkson arriving at BBC Radio One studios in London (pics start here)

Hilary Duff running errands in Sherman Oaks (pics start here)

*106 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

  • Dumb and Dumber 1
  • Dumb and Dumber 2
  • Dumb and Dumber 3
  • Dumb and Dumber 4
  • Dumb and Dumber 5
  • Dumb and Dumber 6
  • Dumb and Dumber 7
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  • Dumb and Dumber 20
  • Dumb and Dumber 1
  • Dumb and Dumber 2
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  • Dumb and Dumber 5
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  • Dumb and Dumber 13
  • Dumb and Dumber 14
  • Dumb and Dumber 15

Paris Hilton arriving at Euston Station in London (5/13)

Paris Hilton realizes that her phone case has an entirely different meaning depending on what word you put the emphasis on, right?

*30 Paris Hilton pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 1
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 2
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 3
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 4
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 5
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 6
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 7
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  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 9
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  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 11
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 12
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 13
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 14
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 15
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 1
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 2
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 3
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 4
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 5
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 6
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 7
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  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 9
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 10
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  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 12
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 13
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 14
  • Paris Hilton Queen of Fucking 15

Paris Hilton and Tinkerbell during happier times

Paris Hilton is minus one family member. No, unfortunately, it's not her brother Conrad -- that little asshole is still alive and kicking. It's Tinkerbell, her chihuahua. She instagrammed earlier this week:
My heart is broken. I am so sad & devastated. After 14 amazing years together my baby Tinkerbell has passed away of old age. I feel like I've lost a member of my family. She was such a special & incredible soul. We went through so much together. I can't believe she's gone. I will miss her & think about her for the rest of my life. I love you Tinky, you are a Legend & will never be forgotten. #RIPTinkerbell
Wow, Paris Hilton's dog lived to be 14. Paris Hilton. Can I have "Things You Didn't See Coming" for $200, Alex? That's god damn amazing. That little fighter outlived, like, six of Paris' Peruvian housekeepers. The last one mistook some blow on the kitchen counter for sugar. Tragic overdose after her morning coffee. The one before that passed away after catching herpes from the toilet seat in the master bathroom. Gabriela, I believe. An absolute doll.

*15 Paris Hilton pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 1
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 2
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 3
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 4
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 5
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 6
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 7
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 8
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  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 11
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  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 13
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 14
  • Paris Hilton Dead Dog 15

Paparazzi photos from Tuesday, February 3

Paris Hilton catching a flight at Ngurah Rai International Airport in Bali (pics start here)

Reality star Josie Cunningham leaving a nightclub in Soho, London (pics start here)

Hilary Duff leaving a gym in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Natasha Lyonne departing on a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley leaving BBC Radio 1 studios in London (pics start here)

Molly Sims at The MOMS Breakfast Mamarazzi at Artisanal Fromage Bistro in New York (pics start here)

Kylie Minogue leaving Chiltern Firehouse in London (pics start here)

Miss Universe Paulina Vega leaving Huffington Post studios in New York (pics start here)

Alessandra Ambrosio out for coffee in Brentwood (pics start here)

Salma Hayek at the Paris Saint Germain vs. Rennes soccer match at Parc des Princes in Paris (pics start here)

Beyonce leaving the Alice + Olivia store in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Amy Smart leaving Lemonade restaurant in West Hollywood (pics start here)

*102 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 1
  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 2
  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 3
  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 4
  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 5
  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 6
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  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 15
  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 1
  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 2
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  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 15
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  • Paris Hilton Bali Shirt 20

Paris Hilton and Jordan Barrett

So Paris Hilton is banging a teenager. She and 18-year-old Australian model Jordan Barrett were seen getting "very close" at the Cavalli Club in Milan over the weekend, according to In Touch Weekly. In Paris Hilton-speak, that means she went down on him. Dammit, we were *this* close to wiping out herpes in people born after 1996, too. Tough break, but we'll get there some day. We'll get there.

UPDATE: The Daily Mail says Barrett's parents are the convicted heads of a $9 million drug cartel in Australia. This hookup makes total sense now.

*30 pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 1
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 2
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 3
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 4
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 5
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 6
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 7
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  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 15
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 1
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  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 14
  • Paris Hilton 18 Year Old 15

Paris Hilton leaving the Beverly Glen Pharmacy in Beverly Hills (1/5)

3 times the cell phones = 3 times the slutty nude selfies. You can't argue with that math.

*15 Paris Hilton pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton iPhones 1
  • Paris Hilton iPhones 2
  • Paris Hilton iPhones 3
  • Paris Hilton iPhones 4
  • Paris Hilton iPhones 5
  • Paris Hilton iPhones 6
  • Paris Hilton iPhones 7
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  • Paris Hilton iPhones 14
  • Paris Hilton iPhones 15

Paris Hilton at St Pancras International train station in London (12/17)

If you're looking to buy me a Christmas present, that sweatshirt. I want that sweatshirt.

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*30 Paris Hilton pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 1
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 2
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 3
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 4
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 5
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  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 15
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 1
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 2
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  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 11
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 12
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 13
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 14
  • Paris Hilton Pedobear 15

Paparazzi photos from Tuesday, December 16

Paris Hilton leaving Chiltern Firehouse in London (pics start here)

Model Daphne Joy out for dinner in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Drew Barrymore leaving a gym in L.A. (pics start here)

Lindsay Lohan and her sister Ali Lohan arriving to the LOVE Magazine/Balmain Christmas Party at The Ivy Market Grill (pics start here)

Brittany Kerr at the 2014 American Country Countdown Awards at the Music City Center in Nashville (pics start here)

Lily Collins shopping at a Frame Store in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Scott Caan out and about in L.A. (pics start here)

Ali Landry shopping at The Grove in Hollywood (pics start here)

Lori Loughlin shopping at The Grove in Hollywood (pics start here)

Kirsten Dunst at the premiere of Unbroken at the Dolby Theatre in Hollywood (pics start here)

Cameron Diaz arriving at BBC Radio 1 studios (pics start here)

Daniel Craig filming the new James Bond film Spectre in Central London (pics start here)

*106 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 1
  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 2
  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 3
  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 4
  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 5
  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 6
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  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 20
  • Paris Hilton London Boobies 1
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Would You Rather?

Would You Rather...? Spend one night with: