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Mariah Carey has a nice house

Mariah Carey's (and Nick Cannon's) new home in Bel Air

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon leaving Mr. Chow restaurant in Beverly Hills (2/19)

"All the right reasons" being she wants to make sure she has a girl and she doesn't want to get fat. Awww, what a heartwarming tale of self-sacrifice. From the Chicago Sun Times:

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon really want to have a child together, but it's sounding more and more like adoption will be the preferred route to parenthood for them. Carey is said to be worried about massive weight gain if she got pregnant, plus she wants to have a child ASAP. The singer also is definite about wanting a little girl -- another reason for the desire to adopt. (Source)

So, Mariah wants a child without actually making one? Sounds like Nick's getting the raw end of this deal. Obviously adopted children these days are becoming the "must have" accessory in Hollywood,* but since when is it done to accommodate a person's time frame, narcissism, and gender preference? If Mariah is really concerned about rescuing a child from a life of hardship and pain, she doesn't need to adopt -- she needs to have her uterus removed.
 
*See: David Banda (Madonna), Maddox Jolie-Pitt (Brangelina), and Khloe Kardashian (Right?)

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon at the World Music Awards in Monte Carlo, Monaco (11/9)

Nick Cannon didn't get to seal the deal with Mariah Carey until after the two were married. The two dated for two or so months before getting married in the Bahamas in April. In an interview with the Daily Mirror, Mariah said:

"It's not that we had NO intimacy, we just didn't have complete intimacy. It's just me, and my feelings. I definitely don't want to push it on anybody else. But we both have similar beliefs, and I just thought that it would be so much more special if we waited until after we were married. And it was, and it still is." (Source)

Kids, do any of you know what Derek Jeter, Grant Hill, Luis Miguel, Eminem, Tyrese, Rick Fox, Eric Benet, and Eddie Murphy all have in common? If you guessed that they all got to milk the cow without buying it, give yourself a gold star. Come on, Mariah was being plowed by Jeter BEFORE she divorced Tommy Mottola, but now she's worried about her virtue? I think Mariah is already sick of Nick and is trying to pull a Madge on him. Any bets on how long until Glitter is linked to some other youngster? But don't worry about that Nick, hang in there. Dummy didn't sign a pre-nup so you're gonna be on easy street before long. And by "easy street," I mean you won't have to prostitute yourself out for money . . . and by "prostitute yourself out for money," I mean you won't have to make Drumline 2.

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon outside the Dorchester Hotel in London (11/6)

+ Janice Dickinson is a nutcase [Drunken Stepfather]

+ Abigail Clancy is freaking gorgeous [Hollywood Tuna]

+ Adriana Lima's new super sexy Miracle Bra commercial [Bastardly]

+ Lizzy Caplan Nude Video #3 from True Blood [Egotastic!]

+ Candice Michelle showing off her amazing body [Popoholic]

+ Enough luggage Mariah? [I'm Not Obsessed]

+ What the hell is Beyonce wearing? [Dlisted]

+ Rachel Bilson slips a nip [College Humor]

+ Sarah Palin didn't know Africa was a continent [A Socialite's Life]

+ Selena Gomez and Carrie Underwood are fighting [Lossip]

+ Is Taylor Swift pregnant? You do the math. [Yeeeah!]

+ One of these celebrity butts is not like the other [CityRag]

+ Lohan hooked up with Justin Timberlake [popbytes]

+ Charlie Sheen's marriage is already on the rocks [Gabby Babble]

Mariah's friends have it all wrong, Nick is a huge Hello Kitty buff

ariah Carey's friends are giving the singer's marriage to Nick Cannon "six months, tops." Why? Because Nick's a ginormous pussy. From Life & Style magazine:

The insider claims that the reason behind that gloom-and-doom prediction is Nick's need to do everything for his diva bride. While Mariah likes being waited on hand and foot, that routine won't work in the long run.

"Nick does whatever Mariah wants him to — he's like her puppy," the insider said. "It seems like Nick spends more time in the stores with Mariah's credit card than he does with Mariah herself. Mariah's assistants and friends call him 'Whipped Nick' behind his back. They have little respect for him because he won't stand up for himself." (Source)

Can you blame Nick for being such a pussy? The last person to tell Mariah 'no' was this chick. You think a shark did that shit? Trust me, that was all Mariah. Besides, becoming a little bitch just to please your sugar mamma isn't a new concept, it's done all the time these days. See: Stedman, David Gest, and . . . what's Rosie's girlfriend's name?

[BauerGriffinOnline]

Mariah Carey in Tokyo (6/1)

Even though she's worth roughly a kajillion dollars and none of them were invited to her and Nick Cannon's wedding, Mariah Carey still wants wedding gifts from her friends. An insider told the New York Post:

"Mariah's assistant, Gina, sent out over 100 e-mails to her wealthy friends letting them know that she's registered at Bergdorf Goodman if they want to buy her a present. It's odd because she's not even having a big wedding party or anything. It was assumed they'd have a big celebration when they got back, but no. They just want the gifts." On the list are "fine china, very expensive silver stemware" and other items. (Source)

They asked for presents from people they didn't even invite? With that kind of behavior hopefully the "other items" Mariah and Nick registered for included "taste," "class," and "decorum." And what do those two need from Bergdorf Goodman anyway? With Mariah's penchant for emotional breakdowns, it would've made more sense if they had registered at Pfizer . . . or Planned Parenthood.*

*It's the gift that keeps on giving.

Nick Cannon's on a short leash

ariah Carey's keeping new husband Nick Cannon on a short leash. Nick was trying to have fun with friends Diddy and Quincy Jones at Saturday night's opening of the MGM Grand at Foxwoods when bitch had to ruin everything. A source told the New York Post:

"He was summoned home by her at 1 in the morning. He didn't look happy about it." (Source)

God knows what Mariah needed, her pillow fluffed, her ass wiped, the TV volume turned down -- something stupid. You know that Mariah sees Nick as nothing more than a butler that she occasionally fucks. In other words, yeah, healthier than most marriages.

[WENN]

Nick Cannon in his new Maserati

Nick Cannon's marriage to Mariah Carey is already paying off. Pacific Coast News says:

Nick Cannon races away from his hotel in his brand new Maserati. Newly-wed Nick picked up his new car from the Ferrari-Maserati dealership in Beverly Hills. Maybe it was a wedding present from new wife, Mariah Carey...?

Or maybe it was a present because it's Wednesday and she's crazy. From Nick's point of view -- when he and Mariah finally divorce -- I'd consider the marriage a failure if he doesn't end up with like 87 cars and four islands.

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon surface

Since I know some of you care about this, here's Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon at the Waverly Inn last night in New York -- their first pics together since what many are calling the most shocking wedding since my sister's Barbie married my Cobra Commander action figure. I never pegged her as the bad boy type.

PICS: People has the exclusive photos from the surprise Mariah Carey-Nick Cannon wedding in this week's issue. Carey told the mag:

"We really do feel we are soulmates. I never felt a love like this was in the cards for me."

Cannon added:

"She is beautiful on the outside and 10 times as beautiful on the inside." (Source)

Also beautiful on the inside? Her wallet.

PRENUP: Fox News claims the reports that Mariah didn't have a prenup are false. Reporter Roger Friedman wrote:

Mariah apparently told a mutual pal of ours: "Anyone who thinks we didn't have a prenup is smoking something!" (Source)

TATTOO: Oprah revealed on her show today that Mariah got the words "Mrs. Cannon" tattooed on her back before the wedding.

BOOBS: Still big.