Miranda Kerr dating James Packer
Miranda Kerr ain't stupid -- she's moved on from Orlando Bloom
and is now dating James Packer, who just happens to be the richest man in Australia. Gee, what a fortunate coincidence for her. From the Sydney Morning Herald
Barely three months after James Packer ended his six-year marriage to the mother of his three children, former model Erica, the billionaire casino mogul has reportedly embarked on a new relationship with another beauty who also hails from the same country town as his ex wife: supermodel Miranda Kerr.
On Monday morning Woman's Day magazine, which was once owned by the Packer family, is set to publish claims Packer, 46, and Kerr, 30, are now in a serious romantic relationship.
PS understands Woman's Day editor Fiona Connolly is ''standing behind the story 100 per cent'', while neither Packer nor Kerr have denied the report nearly a week after first being approached by reporters. It is understood the status of their relationship, said to still be in its very early stages after a long friendship, is a sensitive matter given their recent marriage breakdowns.
So there it is, buddies. Miranda didn't dump Legolas because she was tired of the way he always "borrowed" her hair products or his mirror-hogging ways -- Miranda just likes to swim in lakes of gold coins, a la Scrooge McDuck. She's no better than Simon Cowell, but at least we know what the boundaries for supermodels are now. You either have to be a handsome, empty suit of a man like the young Will Turner
, or be a billionaire with Shrek's face. Personally, I was hoping that Miranda would get a hankering for a certain webmaster who still lives in his mother's basement, but that's her loss. Bitch
.*5 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr at the launch of the new Jaguar F-TYPE Coupe in L.A.
This should probably come as a shock to no one, but it's rumored that Leo DiCaprio is already nailing the newly-single Miranda Kerr. The dined with a group of 15 friends over the weekend in Las Vegas, and witnesses say there was some obvious sexual tension between them. From E!
An eyewitness at the eatery says Kerr, who was with two girlfriends, and DiCaprio sat across from each other. Kerr wore sunglasses, skinny black pants and a black shirt and ate sushi while DiCaprio enjoyed chicken teriyaki.
"They looked like they were having a great time," a source tells E! News of Kerr and DiCaprio, who weren't acting flirty in any way. "They came with a bunch of friends and were overheard talking about going out the night before."
Let's see, did Leo "I plow a supermodel as often as the average guy masturbates" DiCaprio lay the pipe to Miranda "I am a known supermodel" Kerr? Come on, people, work with me. Of course he did, dummies! I don't know if he invented it, but Leo undoubtedly patented the whole "Let's have my squadron of wingmen run interference so we can sneak and survey your vaginal tribute to me" fake get-together. It's a dangerous maneuver practiced by a very elite type of man-whore -- only true masters like Leo and myself are skilled enough to pull it off and not come off as total douchebags . . . right, Mr. Piven? Leo's the latest in a long line of superheros to have this power. He's sort of a James Bond, except he's not catching evil villains -- he's pounding puss.*30 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr arriving for a flight at LAX airport (11/6)*15 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom at the 2013 Vanity Fair Oscar Party at Sunset Tower in West Hollywood
As ridiculous as it sounds, there's a story floating around that Justin Bieber was one of the causes of Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr's split. I guess Orlando wasn't too pleased about the pair's friendship and constant flirting. Dude, is this kid hiding a maple tree in his pants and we just don't know about it or what? From Britain's Sunday People
Photos of the pair snuggling up after a Victoria's Secret fashion show last year have also emerged, with reports they spent several hours together at an after party and partied well on into the night.
"Orlando heard that there had been some flirting going on and he wasn't exactly thrilled about it," a source said. "Miranda had always claimed that she was a fan of Justin's music. She has taught her son how to say 'Bieber fever' but it is supposed to have caused an issue."
No fucking way, bro. Tell me this came from Bieber's camp. Yeah, that's it, Team Pasty put this press release out to save the lad some face. Imagine if someone took all the boy bands of the '80s and '90s and mashed them into a colossal Pacific Rim
-like robot of douchiness? That Mighty Morphing Poser Ranger would be Justin Bieber (especially the gay parts). I refuse to believe that Miranda is so dense that she doesn't know that laying down for JB is career suicide. I understand that maybe Miranda wants to be with someone even less intimidating than Legolas of Mirkwood, but she's gonna have to fight Justin's bodyguards/hangers on/showermates for his attention.*30 Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr leaving her apartment on the Upper East Side of New York
Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom haven't been photographed together in months because they've been secretly separated. And now they're getting a divorce. Oh well, we'll always have Kim and Kanye to keep that fire burning. The actor and supermodel -- who've been married a little over three years -- issued a statement today:
"They have been amicably separated for the past few months. After six years together, they have recently decided to formalize their separation. Despite this being the end of their marriage, they love, support and respect each other as both parents of their son and as family."
I bet Adam Levine's kicking himself now for proposing to Behati Prinsloo back in July. And John Mayer -- dumping Katy Perry now is gonna be real awkward with all that sappy shit
she's been saying lately. Basically Miranda is the hottest bitch in school now, and all the football players are stuck with their bitchy girlfriends. So that just leaves the dork who sits alone at lunch eating his boogers. Jeremy Piven, come on down!*10 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr at the Mademoiselle C cocktail party at Pavillon Ledoyen in Paris
Apparently Miranda Kerr wants to be an actress now. Okay, sure. Just stay away from Michael Bay's casting couch and everything will be fine. From Page Six
The supermodel wife of Orlando Bloom was overheard saying at Stuart Weitzman and Gilt's bash to celebrate the 20th anniversary of Weitzman's famed 5050 boot, "I am talking to acting agents."
Kerr also revealed at Wednesday's event at Neuehouse that she's met with Weinstein Company president of TV Meryl Poster after guest-starring on "Project Runway: All Stars."
On paper this looks like a good idea. Who doesn't want to gawk at one of the hottest supermodels on Earth for an hour-and-a-half at a time? Hell, I already have a lovely overcoat and a popcorn bucket with a pre-cut hole picked out in anticipation of Mrs. Legolas' first flick. The thing is, being legendary spank material doesn't automatically turn a gal into a movie star. Cindy Crawford nearly derailed her career way back in 1995 in the epically awful Fair Game
(although the blame can easily be out on Willy Baldwin's feet). My advice to Miranda? Nude scenes -- lots of them. Lose the clothes, smile real pretty to the camera, and never, ever speak. *20 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr arriving to the Stuart Weitzman & Gilt digital pop-up shop launch at NeueHouse in New York (10/16)*15 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr wearing a piece of her collection
Miranda Kerr has a pretty awesome collection from her travels across the world: miniature decorative spoons. Wait, that's not right . . . lingerie. She collects lingerie. From Cosmo
"When I get home, I'm not the boss like I am at work - I slip into a more feminine role. I take everything off and put on my Stella McCartney silk robe. I'll put on a red lip or red nails, and it lifts my mood. Sexy underwear also gives you a spark. I collect underwear from my travels. Lace, lingerie, bodysuits...they're like souvenirs."
Damn it, Miranda fucking rules. She drafted late in the second round when she let Orlando Bloom put a ring on her finger, yet she still treats him like a king by prancing around her mansion in cutesy costumes for him. We should treasure this moment. Miranda Kerr is handing out life lessons to all of you girls who think your careers are important. Guess what? They're not, unless your career is to make your man happy -- and what finer career can a gal have chosen for her? None that I could think of . . . now be a dear and take the pie out of the oven before you scrub the toilet. *30 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery:
Paparazzi photos from Friday, October 4
leaving Balmain in Paris (pics start here
out and about in L.A. (pics start here
arriving at his hotel in New York (pics start here
arriving at a medical building in Encino (pics start here
outside his hotel in New York (pics start here
and his wife Kyra Sedgwick
shopping in West Hollywood (pics start here
out and about in New York (pics start here
Sarah Michelle Gellar
out and about in New York (pics start here
checking out his home under renovation in Brentwood (pics start here
leaving a gym in Hollywood (pics start here
shopping at the Colette in Paris (pics start here
picking her daughter up from school in New York (pics start here
having lunch in West Hollywood (pics start here
*113 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:
Miranda Kerr leaving the Stella McCartney 2014 Spring/Summer show during Paris Fashion Week
I don't know how it's possible that Miranda Kerr's boobs didn't fall out of her dress yesterday in Paris. It just defies explanation. I think she may be practicing some kind of witchcraft or sorcery. I should lock her in my basement just to be safe.*30 Miranda Kerr pictures total in the gallery: