Miley Cyrus

Miley Cyrus is #1 on Maxim's Hot 100

I don't know if there was a miscount in the voting or Billy Ray Cyrus is the new editor or what, but Miley Cyrus has been named the hottest woman in the world by Maxim. WTF? She's probably not even the hottest woman that lives on her street. Over the weekend, she tweeted the picture above and wrote:

Didn't know this was coming out yet! I'm so happy to be #1 on Maxims HOT 100! #myfanskickass #dreamsdocometrue

Let me start by giving the boys over at Maxim a hearty "thank you" for being such loyal readers of Celebslam -- I had no idea that my rantings would lead to such a dramatic win for our favorite dirty little hillbilly. Here's the thing, guys -- it's all a big goof. Miley gives me erections the same way Two Girls, One Cup gives me erections: full of tears, shame, and self-loathing (like the Kardashians at a Klan meeting). But don't follow my lead on everything, because I tend to take the dark path on every opportunity available (again, like the Kardashians).

*5 Miley Cyrus pictures total in the gallery:

Miley Cyrus in V magazine

Here's some behind-the-scenes pics of Miley Cyrus' photoshoot for the May issue of V magazine, including one where you can kinda see her nipple. It's not as shocking and sexually graphic as all the scenes on the director's cut of the Hannah Montana Season 2 DVD (still banned in 11 states), but it's still something.

*11 Miley Cyrus V mag pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Wednesday, May 1

Miley Cyrus pumping gas in Studio City California (pics start here)

Rihanna going out for dinner in New York (pics start here)

Michelle Rodriguez going to dinner at Madeo in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Kim Kardashian arriving at Heathrow airport in London (pics start here)

Hilary Duff arriving at NBC studios in New York (pics start here)

Nicky Hilton out and about in East Village in New York (pics start here)

Orlando Bloom leaving the gym in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Nicole Richie arriving at LAX (pics start here)

Selma Blair out and about in Los Angeles (pics start here)

Emily Blunt out and about in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Gerard Butler arriving at an office in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Kelly Ripa walking home in Soho in New York (pics start here)

*109 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Tuesday, April 23

Miley Cyrus leaving the Montage Hotel in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Kate Upton arriving for a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Ashley Tisdale and her boyfriend Christopher French at a friend's wedding Cabo San Lucas, Mexico (pics start here)

Jennifer Love Hewitt arriving on a flight at Washington Dulles International Airport (pics start here)

Camila Alves arriving at a gym in New York (pics start here)

Olivia Wilde at a screening of The Rider and the Storm at the 2013 Tribeca Film Festival in New York (pics start here)

Kim Kardashian returning to her hotel in New York (pics start here)

Kiefer Sutherland out and about in New York (pics start here)

Israeli model Bar Paly at the premiere of Pain & Gain at TCL Chinese Theatre in Hollywood (pics start here)

Magdalena Frackowiak on the set of a Victoria's Secret catalog photoshoot in Central Park, New York (pics start here)

Eddie Cibrian and LeAnn Rimes leaving a restaurant in Toronto after celebrating their 2nd wedding anniversary (pics start here)

Emma Stone leaving Rag & Bone in New York (pics start here)

*117 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Miley Cyrus leaving Cameo nightclub in Miami (4/7)

After getting high on her balcony the day before, Miley Cyrus was spotted sneaking out of Cameo nightclub at 5AM on Sunday morning after spending "several" hours inside. Which is weird because Miley doesn't turn 21 until this November. Hmmm, the poor little lamb must have thought it was an ice cream parlor or something and wandered in and got lost. I'm just glad to see she found her way out unharmed!

*15 Miley Cyrus pics total in the gallery:

Miley Cyrus smoking a joint in Miami (4/6)

Miley Cyrus was caught smoking a joint Saturday afternoon in Miami -- and by "caught" I mean she purposely lit up on her hotel balcony in full view of the paparazzi. That's right. Miley Cyrus doesn't play by the rules. If 95% of Hollywood wasn't high on coke/heroin/acid/ecstasy/morphine right now, 95% of Hollywood would be absolutely shocked. Maybe for her next hardcore act of rebellion, she'll drive 55 in a 45 and then fail to signal when changing lanes. Scandal!

*30 Miley Cyrus pictures total in the gallery:

Miley Cyrus leaving her hotel in New York (2/13)

Fresh off her near-nip slip at the Pre-Grammy Gala on Saturday night, Miley Cyrus hit up Fashion Week in New York last night, and again, her boob almost popped out of her dress. Wow, this would be a really awesome story if the words "Miley Cyrus" were replaced with "Anyone Else."

*30 Miley Cyrus pictures total in the gallery:

Miley Cyrus at the Recording Academy's 2013 Pre-Grammy Gala at the Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills (2/9)

Miley Cyrus attended the pre-Grammy Gala on Saturday night wearing that, and somehow her boobs didn't pop out of her dress. Or maybe they did. I don't know. Geesh, why don't you get off my fucking back?

*28 Miley Cyrus pictures total in the gallery:

Miley Cyrus leaving a friend's house in Studio City (1/4)

Miley Cyrus bet on the 49ers to win the Super Bowl, right? And had to wear that because she lost? That's the only thing that makes sense. The last chick I saw wearing an outfit like that had no teeth and tried to suck my dick for meth.

*31 Miley Cyrus pics total in the gallery:

Miley Cyrus and a big booty ho

TMZ "managed" to get ahold of some pictures from Miley Cyrus' birthday party last month (read: one of her friends is driving around a new car right now), including one where Miley is grabbing the ass of a "big booty ho":

Miley rang in her 20th last month with a house party in Hollywood ... and sources inside the bash tell us Miley's friends ordered a few strippers -- one of whom dropped a booty-shaking lap dance on the birthday girl. We're told Miley couldn't resist (we understand) ... jumped up, hugged the dancer and grabbed her ample butt, which was busy swallowing a pink g-string.

Miley issued a warning tweet before her birthday ... "if I don't get atleast one big booty hoe my friends are officially not my friends anymore"

Now that Miley's true slutty self is being revealed, it's actually quite remarkable that Billy Ray was able to keep her in check for the whole Hanna Montana run. If he wasn't around, she'd probably have a wing at the abortion clinic named after her by now: The Miley Cyrus Center For Dumb Chicks Who Fell For The Ol' "I Promise I'm Only Gonna Put The Tip In" Line

*5 Miley Cyrus pictures total in the gallery: