Megan Fox outside Fuse Studios in New York (6/26)
Remember that story on Tuesday about Shia LaBeouf
probably nailing Megan Fox? Well maybe we shouldn't erect a statue of his penis in the middle of Times Square quite yet. He probably didn't hit that. From
Fox News:
"I understand the introspection that way, we have been working with each other for years now. She is a very attractive girl and I am a red blooded 23-year-old," LaBeouf said. "I get it ...It makes sense to me but it is just a professional relationship regardless of what my wishes and hopes would be."
But how does Fox feel about the romance rumors?
"We have just a real good natural chemistry. I enjoy the shit out of him, I enjoy his personality a lot," she said. "He is absurdly witty, I love him to death and we sort of have like a natural banter, brother-sister relationship that we both enjoy."
Megan "enjoys his personality" and thinks he's "absurdly witty"? Oh man, that's the kiss of death. "I enjoy your personality" is chick-speak for "You will never see me naked." Plus, the fact that Megan thinks of Shia in a "brother-sister" kind of way means that the only way he's ever going to be able to score with her is if they both move to the Ozarks . . . or turn into
the Jolie siblings.
Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf at the German premiere of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen at the Potsdamer Platz Square in Berlin (6/14)
Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf have been spending a lot of time together lately while promoting the newest
Transformers film, so it comes as no surprise that he probably weaseled his way into her bed. From the
New York Daily News:
Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox are certainly fanning the gossip fires when it comes to reports they’re an item. The “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” co-stars (whose movie killed the competition with a $201 million five-day opening) sat side by side during a dinner with 10 pals — including director Oliver Stone — at Nobu on Thursday.
"They definitely seemed into each other," says a witness, who told us that when Fox left at 10 p.m., LaBeouf followed hot on her heels. Another spy added that, while partying at a Rose’s bash in West Hollywood earlier in the week, "Shia couldn’t keep his eyes off of Megan: He literally watched her like a hawk all night."
Watched her like a hawk? I've actually had a judge use that same exact phrase right before he handed down my sentence. Yet the
Daily News somehow makes it seem cute and innocent. Dammit, I wish they had been writing about my "situation" last year instead of the rookies that work at my local paper. I bet those veterans would have never used such a loaded term as "Panty Bandit."
Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green out and about in L.A. (6/23)
Even though they're
supposed to be broken up, Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green were spotted getting coffee together this morning. Shortly after this pic was taken, a herd of golden unicorns ran by the couple and then flew off into the sky. A bystander commented, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT . . . did you see that dork with Megan Fox?!"
Megan Fox feels sorry for the fat kid
Megan Fox is sorry for dissing that chubby kid in London last week. The kid attempted to give Megan a rose as a symbol of his unrequited love but Megan totally blew him off. She told
WENN:
"I feel so sad for him. That’s so terrible. That kills me. There were, like 80 million people everywhere. It’s dark, all I see are flashes. Everyone’s yelling different things… and I didn’t know what was happening. If you know his name, I will send him a personal apology. I’m horrified. I would never do that. I’m sorry, sweet boy. I would never do that to you, and I would gladly accept your rose if I see you again."
Didn't Megan get the memo? Hollywood starlets aren't supposed to console heart-broken 14-year-olds these days. Teachers are. Oh, and after reading this story, I can pretty much guarantee you three things in life: 1. Death, 2. Taxes, and 3. There'll be 400 dudes holding out a single rose at Megan's next public appearance -- which of course is all just a big waste of their time . . . since I'll be there with a dozen. According to this rose chart I have, that's at least worth a reach around.
Megan Fox at the London premiere of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen at the Odeon Leicester Square (6/15)
I don't mean to turn Celebslam into a Megan Fox fansite (
or do I), but I think it's worth mentioning that she has been absolutely killing it this past week while promoting
Transformers 2. To put it in "people who are good at hitting home runs" terms, Megan is Babe Ruth and everyone else is that surfer chick from Hawaii who got her arm ripped off by a shark a few years ago.
Megan Fox out and about in L.A. (3/26)
Even though
she already told Australia's
Daily Telegraph last week that she was single, the Internets are on fire today because Megan Fox told
The Sun she was single. To recap, Megan Fox is still single from when she was single last week:
"I'm currently what you would call single I guess." When asked who she'd like to go out with next, Megan replied: "Oh I don't know. There is this Korean Justin Timberlake named Rain and I'm really on his situation now. I'm trying to fix this up. I'm working hard."
The Korean Justin Timberlake? That sounds like a
Saturday Night Live sketch. Are we sure she wasn't joking when she gave this interview? That aside, how stoked are you if you're this 'Rain' dude. Megan Fox basically just called his penis out in front of millions of people. Clearly the only way to settle this feud is for the two of them to meet by the old oak tree after school, and then Megan can blow him.
Megan Fox Megan Fox at the German premiere of
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen at the Potsdamer Platz Square in Berlin (6/14)
Megan Fox at the premiere of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen in Tokyo (6/8)
Megan Fox is definitely single. She confirmed her status to Australia's
Daily Telegraph:
"I am not in a committed relationship right now. I really don't know anything about being single yet, really. I've been reading a lot and listening to music and trying just to work on myself. I was with someone from the time I was 18, so I've never been forced to take care of myself. I've always had someone doing that for me.
"Right now there's no space in my head for who's going to be next or how I need to fill my time. I'm just trying to be comfortable with who I am before I get into another relationship. (Otherwise) I will be Elizabeth Taylor by the time I'm 60 and I don't want to do that.''
E! is reporting that
Twilight's Robert Pattinson may be to blame for Megan
calling off her engagement to boyfriend Brian Austin Green. Pattinson supposedly tapped that ass last year:
A knowledgeable and well-established source who worked extensively on Jennifer's Body with Megan claims that M.F. was running her mouth about how she "hooked up" with Robert Pattinson. Interpret that how you will. Supposedly, this was around the time Meg and Bri had called off their engagement.
"Megan was totally into [Rob] and thought he was really cute," snitches our high-up, on-the-set sleuth. "But nothing ever went further than one night they were together. He totally blew her off."
And now there's rumors that Pattinson is dating his
Twilight costar Kristen Stewart (the chick that
constantly looks high). He chose that bitch over Megan Fox. Incredible. Robert could walk around San Francisco with a rainbow-colored dildo that shot fireworks sticking out of his ass and that'd be less gay than picking Kristen Stewart over Megan Fox.
Megan Fox Megan Fox arriving to LAX airport (6/6)
Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf at the premiere of Eagle Eye in L.A. (9/2008)
Shia LaBeouf is wise beyond his years. During the filming of
Transformers 2, he had a ready and willing
Megan Fox in front of him and he took full advantage of it From
Entertainment Tonight:
Shia and Megan open up about what it was like to film their kissing scene for their new film, Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen, "We did something like five takes," Shia says. "Yeah, we shot that scene all day," Megan adds. "Clearly he enjoyed it!"
Is Megan a good kisser? "Yeah absolutely," Shia says. "I think she'd say I'm pretty good too." Megan responds, "I've said it before, he's a really kisser. It's always awkward, you're on set with a bunch of grown men, sweaty sitting outside, carrying camera equipment and wanting to take their break, and you're having to kiss!"
Five takes? That's it? Here's a reenactment of how the scene would have went down if I was in Shia's place:
Director: "And . . . action!"
Me: *starts making out with Megan -- maybe grabs a little titty* . . . "FUCK! COCK! SHIT! ASS!"
Director: "Dammit Nick! Will you step yelling 'FUCK! COCK! SHIT! ASS!' during every take? This is a PG-13 movie you idiot!"
Me: "OK, OK, sorry. Let's just try the scene more time and I promise I won't do it."
Director: "Take #72. And . . . action!"
