Matthew Perry

Matthew Perry out and about in Malibu (9/16)

When Chaz Bono got rid of her boobs, did she give them to Matthew Perry? Just wondering, because he's getting me all horny.

ALTERNATE HEADLINE: If you grab Matthew Perry in the chest, does that count as getting to second base?

*10 Matthew Perry pictures total in the gallery:

Matthew Perry arriving to Nobu in Malibu (8/23)

Matthew Perry (kids, ask your parents who he is) is slowly transforming into a bitter old man. Get off my lawn! From the National Enquirer:

Vince Vaughn and his 'Hangover' pal Zach Galifianakis had a blast over dinner on the patio at Hollywood's Chateau Marmont on July 30. The guys got so rowdy that an annoyed Matthew Perry, who was seated nearby with a friend, asked to move inside for some "peace and quiet." (Print Edition - 8/17)

Mathew didn't go inside to get some "peace and quiet" from the rowdy whippersnappers making noise, he went inside to watch Murder She Wrote. Besides, eating on the patio was probably causing his chamomile tea to get cold and his arthritis to flare up. If Mathew has decided to make his transformation into a senior citizen official, there's only one thing left for him to do: break his hip eat dinner before 5 PM vote.

Matthew Perry leaving a medical building in Beverly Hills (8/13)

You know Matthew Perry has pretty much disappeared over the last five years? I think I know where's he been. Taco Bell.