+ Victoria's Secret still employs very sexy women [Guyism]
+ Guess that cheerleader-turned-housewife . . . [Celebuzz]
+ Games of Thrones is just awesome (NSFW) [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ The sexiest superfans of MLB Opening Day [Busted Coverage]
+ That guy from Buckwild died [Dlisted]
+ 25 people way cooler than you [Linkiest]
+ Chris Brown is calling Drake gay now or something [Evil Beet]
+ Hot, fit girls [Caveman Circus]
Maria Shriver leaving the Nick Chavez salon in Beverly Hills (11/29)
What the hell crawled up Maria Shriver's ass? Believe it or not, not every Hispanic chick out there had sex with your estranged husband (most, not all), so tone down the attitude a bit. From Mike Walker at the National Enquirer:
Does Maria Shriver think she's and INS agent - or does she just have a thing about Latina housekeepers? In a bizarre incident that could trigger legal action, sources say Maria - who's still renting a luxury condo at the ritzy Montage hotel in BevHills - confronted a Hispanic women sent to clean the place and asked her: "Are you in this country legally?" When the stunned woman replied that she was, Maria allegedly demanded: "Show me your work papers!" Bursting into tears, the terrified women ran and made a beeline for the hotel's Human Resources office, where she filed a complaint accusing Arnold Schwarzenegger's estranged wife of harassment - and she's even threatened to sue the hotel! Stay tuned. (Print Edition - 12/12)
What does Maria care if the housekeeper is legal? She was married to a man for 25 years that murdered the English language worse than Ebonics and public schooling combined. Besides, who cares if your cleaning lady is legal or illegal? It's not like you're going to find some white American to clean up your crap -- they're too "busy" protesting a system that's penalized them for being lazy. Oh yeah, I'll go join the "Occupy" protests. As soon as I get a day off from fucking work. Jackasses.
Maria Shriver leaving the AT&T store in Santa Monica (6/22)
There's bad financial decision and then there's what Maria Shriver did earlier this month. From the Chicago Sun Times:
According to one of Maria Shriver’s closest friends, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s future ex-wife would not accept the reported $15 million advance publishers supposedly are throwing her way.
“Maria will never write a book about their breakup — no matter how much she’s offered. Her family’s privacy — and especially her intense devotion to protecting her children — is her primary concern, as it always has been,” said the Shriver insider.
Turning down $15 million to write about how hurt you were by your husband going raw dog on a fat chick is almost as bad a decision as actually going raw dog on a fat chick. Then again, Arnold did marry Maria -- who sometimes looks like this -- so he's prone to making bad decisions.
Maria Shriver, Christina Schwarzenegger, and Christopher Schwarzenegger leaving a restaurant in Brentwood (5/18)
Here's some pics of Arnold Schwarzenegger's Brentwood family leaving a restaurant yesterday after getting some lunch. Arnold hasn't been spotted with them since ze scandal broke. In a way, I'm jealous of him. I'm sure you've seen his infamous maid Patty by now. Could you imagine going through life being able to beat off to literally any woman walking the street, no matter what shape or size? What freedom.
Arnold Schwarzenegger in his famous 1977 documentary Pumping Iron
This shit just keeps getting better and better. Turns out Arnold Schwarzenegger's love child was born just five days after his son Christopher in 2007. Oh my god -- they could totally be BFFs! From the New York Daily News:
Arnold Schwarzenegger's housekeeper separated from her husband in 1997 - just three weeks after her reported love child with her boss was born. Court paper say they had no children.
According to a birth certificate, [Patty] Baena's son was born Oct. 2, three weeks before the separation, which they blamed on "irreconcileable differences."
Schwarzenegger's second son with Shriver, Christopher, was born Sept. 27.
In Arnold's defense, he did knock up Maria almost a week before he knocked up Patty. So, you know, it's not like he didn't give her first dibs. Yet still, she complains.
Arnold Schwarzenegger leaving Barneys New York in Beverly Hills (5/10)
Since Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver announced their split last week, there have been whispers that Maria was the one who ended the relationship because she just couldn't live with Arnold's constant cheating. Last week Bill Zwecker of the Chicago Sun Times said:
While the couple is insisting there will be no further comments beyond the announcement of their separation, sources close to the spouses say the collapse of the marriage was caused by multiple allegations of the aging action star’s marital infidelities, his increasingly over-the-top ego trips and Shriver’s realization she played a very minor role in the script of Schwarzenegger’s life.
Even though I'm inclined not to believe her because she looks like a goblin, it looks like she was right. Schwarzenegger issued a statement last night confirming the LA Times story about him fathering a child with a member of his household staff (read: housekeeper) ten years go -- a staffer who only retired in January:
"After leaving the governor's office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago. I understand and deserve the feelings of anger and disappointment among my friends and family. There are no excuses and I take full responsibility for the hurt I have caused. I have apologized to Maria, my children and my family. I am truly sorry.
"I ask that the media respect my wife and children through this extremely difficult time. While I deserve your attention and criticism, my family does not."
I'm actually kinda surprised by this story. I guess I always figured Arnold to be the type of gentleman who would strong-arm a woman into having a secret abortion. Kids, there's a lesson to be learned here and that lesson is this: don't have affairs with crazy Catholic maids.
No word on who this staffer is and the LA Times ain't saying:
To protect their privacy, The Times is not publishing the former staffer's name nor that of her child. In an interview Monday before Schwarzenegger issued his statement, the former staffer said another man — her then-husband — was the child's father.
She said she voluntarily left her position with the couple earlier this year after reaching a longstanding goal of working for them for two decades. "I wanted to achieve my 20 years, then I asked to retire," she said, adding she received a severance payment and "left on good terms with them."
How stoked are you if you're this love child? Your dad just went from being a down-on-his-luck mechanic to THE FUCKING TERMINATOR. I'm sorry but that is just plain awesome. The coolest thing that happened to me when I was ten was when I accidentally grabbed Jenny Johnson's boob on the playground. That definitely sucks in comparison, especially when you consider that bitch had no tits.
*5 Arnold Schwarzenegger pictures total in the gallery:
Arnold Schwarzenegger and his family leaving the Ivy At The Shore restaurant in Santa Monica (5/8)
It's always weird when old people break up, especially when they've been married a quarter of a century. Like Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver, who made a separation announcement late yesterday. C'mon, you two. No one wants to date an old person. Just stay together. From People:
After a 25-year marriage as one of the nation's leading power couples in Hollywood and politics, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver have split up, they say in a joint statement.
“This has been a time of great personal and professional transition for each of us," they say. "After a great deal of thought, reflection, discussion, and prayer, we came to this decision together. At this time, we are living apart, while we work on the future of our relationship. We are continuing to parent our four children together. They are the light and the center of both of our lives."
Arnold has enough money to last ten lifetimes. His career in politics is over. He's doesn't need to impress anyone. His legacy is already written. Why not just say fuck it and start dating Selena Gomez?
*20 Arnold Schwarzenegger pictures total in the gallery:
Maria Shriver was caught talking on her cell phone while driving in L.A. yesterday, which has been illegal in California since January. Also illegal? Driving around with dead hookers in your trunk . . . click here to read more about the Jonas Brothers!
Would You Rather...? Spend one night with: