Lindsay Lohan arriving at Chiltern Firehouse in London
If you invite Lindsay Lohan to your wedding, you better expect some drama. Painting her nails during the ceremony, flipping out because she thought people were taking her picture, and accusing someone of drugging her -- it's all in a day's work. From the New York Post
Lindsay Lohan claimed she was "slipped a mickey" at the wedding of Justin Etzin, consul general and ambassador of tourism for the Seychelles, and model Lana Zakocela in Florence last week.
"Lindsay left the reception early," said a source. "She'd gone back to her villa and was running around naked saying she was drugged."
We hear "it was one thing after the next [with Lohan]" during the lavish four-day affair.
To recap: Lindsay Lohan went to the reception and somebody put free drugs in her drink. Best. Wedding. Ever.
*16 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan at Mykonos Island National Airport
In case you're wondering what Lindsay Lohan's been up to, she only ended her vacation in Greece yesterday. That's her catching a flight out of Mykonos yesterday. According to my calculations
, she's been there three weeks. Lindsay Lohan could afford to vacation for three weeks. If that doesn't illustrate how deep of a shithole the Greek economy is in, then I don't know what does. #prayforgreece
*15 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan in a bikini in Mykonos, Greece
Here's Lindsay Lohan on vacation in Mykonos yesterday because why wouldn't she be? She relaxes hard for her money, dammit. She's like Ryan Seacrest and his hundred companies, but exactly the opposite.
*30 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan at the launch of the Magnum Pleasure Store at the Royal Opera House in Covent Garden, London
Lindsay Lohan -- yes the one is desperate need of employment -- turned down a Burger King commercial because they wanted to "poke fun" at her past issues. Bitch, everybody already knows you used to be the west coast Tony Montana. You might as well embrace it and start getting paid. From Page Six
The flame-haired actress was asked to wear a Spicy Chicken Fries box, smoke a chicken fry like a cigarette, and vamp a "spicy" monologue.
"We were gob-smacked. It was making fun of her issues," an insider told me. Lohan and her managers at Untitled Talent suggested some alternate concepts to no avail.
What's 10% commission on $0?
Another source said Lohan was too demanding. "She wanted creative control," said my source. Exasperated reps for Burger King said, "Forget about it."
"She's broke, sleeping at different guys' apartments, but she thinks she's Elizabeth Taylor," the source said.
For all her troubles, there is one thing you can't deny about Lindsay Lohan. She's 29, but looks 49. Oh, wait, did you think I was going to say something nice? Um . . . at least she doesn't look 59.
*11 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan eating dinner at Roka Mayfair in London
Gigantic cocktail? Check.
Glazed-over look on her face? Check.
Sunglasses at night? Check.
Feels like we're slowing getting our Lindsay back.
*13 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan shopping in Milan
You may have heard that Lindsay Lohan is behind on the court-ordered community service stemming from her 2012 reckless-driving case in Los Angeles. Like, way behind. Like, 125 of the 135 mandated hours still to be completed. And she only has until May 28. A little over 7 hours a day, every day, until May 28. Good luck with that. The New York Daily News
says Lindsay's flying into the city today and will start working tomorrow:
A Los Angeles judge last week approved the "Mean Girls" star's request to serve her time helping preschoolers at the Duffield Children's Center in Fort Greene, Brooklyn, having been placed there through Brooklyn Community Service.
Prosecutors say they'll seek jail time if she blows the deadline.
Is exposing highly-impressionable preschoolers to Lindsay Lohan really the greatest idea in the world? I just feel like in 10 years we're gonna have this superclass of young criminal, wreaking havoc on urban areas, leading to chaos, anarchy, and the eventual downfall of this country. Just watch, when that happens, I am so gonna say I told you so.
*15 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan's Instagram boob
No one really talks about her much anymore, so here's Lindsay Lohan trying to drum up some relevance by showing her boob on Instagram. And it didn't really work either. In the past, I would have devoted a day's coverage to this pic. Now it only merits casual mention in between bites of my Pop-Tart. Let's face it, she's boring. I never thought I would say this about Lindsay Lohan, but would it kill this chick to get a DUI?*2 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan's poorly-photoshopped ass
Poor Lindsay Lohan wants a bubble butt, but can't afford plastic surgery like Kim Kadashian, so she's resorted to photoshop. And very bad photoshop at that. Maybe next time, Lindsay, hire someone to alter your pics with more experience than an hour-long course at The Learning Annex.*15 Lindsay Lohan flat ass pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan at Kanye West's show in Paris yesterday
Lindsay Lohan's living it up in Paris now because why wouldn't she be, and that includes watching Kanye West perform last night. Obviously. Lindsay wasn't gonna miss that concert for the world. Kanye's her #1 nigga! From her Instagram
earlier today (the bold part since deleted):
#kanye&kimAlldaynigga$ fun show #PFW #goodpeople=goodlife 🙏 all from good moms!!!!!! @dinalohan @krisjenner
The funniest thing about this situation isn't Lindsay dropping the N-bomb or the phrase "good moms" being followed by the names Dina Lohan and Kris Jenner -- it's the actual picture Lindsay took at the concert. LOL. I mean, what, is she working as a hot dog vendor? That picture might as well have been taken through a chain link fence.UPDATE
: Lindsay was just voted president of the the national chapter of Sigma Alpha Epsilon. Congrats, Lindsay!*10 Lindsay Lohan pictures total in the gallery:
Lindsay Lohan photoshops down to a size zero
A little advice for Lindsay Lohan: If you're gonna photoshop a pic to make yourself look like one of the trainers from Biggest Loser
, you have to make it somewhat believable. Next time add in some liquor bottles and maybe a few stray Vicodin. No one really believes you'd ever be in a bathroom without that stuff.