Khloe Kardashian leaving the Trump Soho Hotel in New York
Khloe Kardashian told Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens: Live
last night that she and Lamar Odom made a sex tape. Hopefully not in the past few months. That would just be weird having to pull all the tubes out and stuff:
"I've definitely recorded myself having sex with my ex-husband," the svelte reality star told host Andy Cohen. "But not like, talking to camera. You remember those little cameras, little video cameras, that was my jam for a moment."
...the tape [is] still in her possession -- "in my safe," she said.... (New York Post)
This is the least newsworthy Kardashian story in the history of this family. Of course Khloe made a sex tape -- she's a Kardashian. It'd be more newsworthy if she did something totally against family tradition. "Breaking: Khloe Kardashian Dating a Nice Jewish Boy."
*10 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian at the Cosmopolitan 50th Birthday Celebration in West Hollywood
In the wake of Lamar Odom almost fucking himself to death, he and estranged wife Khloe Kardashian have called off their divorce. Yay! So romantic! From TMZ
Khloe's lawyer Laura Wasser went before a judge Wednesday morning, asking a judge to withdraw the papers they both signed to end their marriage. The file was sitting in a pile waiting to be processed and signed by a judge. The judge granted Wasser's request and the file is now dead.
As we reported, Khloe privately vowed to be by Lamar's side during his recovery, which will take months, and a few days ago they both agreed to give their marriage another chance. They both signed the document Wasser presented to the judge, asking that the divorce case be dismissed.
You can't blame Khloe for calling off the divorce. Through her actions, you can tell she deeply deeply deeply cares about . . . money. Lamar going through rehab is at least a few seasons worth of material for her next reality show. Lamar traded Khloe's wedding ring for crack? That's a helluva season premiere. Lamar fell off the wagon and fucked a tranny on Skid Row? I'd watch that finale.
*25 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian leaving Maxfield in West Hollywood
Despite the strippers
, despite the cheating
, despite the addiction to crack, despite the disappearing
for days at a time, despite the DUI
, and despite the fact that he still rents movies from Blockbuster
(!), Khloe Kardashian hasn't given up on Lamar Odom. She was spotted wearing her gigantic wedding ring yesterday while shopping in West Hollywood. Or, since this is Khloe Kardashian we're talking about, maybe I'm completely wrong and it's actually one of those ring pops. "Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!"
*20 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Lamar Odom at Blockbuster Video in L.A.
You know how you can tell Lamar Odom has a serious drug problem? He wanted to watch a movie on Saturday night SO HE WENT TO BLOCKBUSTER
. Not Redbox or Netflix or Pirate's Bay -- Blockbuster. Gosh, I hope on his way home, his horse-drawn wagon didn't get robbed by bandits. "Take anything but this here talkie I just rented that I'm fixin' to view tonight."*10 Lamar Odom pictures total in the gallery:
Lamar Odom arrested for DUI
Lamar Odom was arrested for DUI at 3:54 this morning after weaving down the 101 freeway at 50 MPH (the fastest anyone has ever gone on the 101). According to TMZ
, Lamar failed "numerous" field sobriety tests and was probably under the influence of more than just alcohol:
Deputies at the scene smelled alcohol on Lamar and believe he was under the influence of both drugs and alcohol. The sources say Lamar's driving and conduct were consistent with drugs. We're told there were no drugs or alcohol found in Lamar's car ... only cigarettes, 2 bottles of cologne and other innocuous items.
No matter how you feel about the Kardashians, this downward spiral
is a pretty sad situation for Lamar and Khloe. I'm just glad other members of the family have somehow summoned the strength to remain positive during this trying time. "Lamar got a DUI? We have our season finale!!!!" - Kris Jenner upon hearing the news this morning.
Lamar Odom at Taco Bell in the San Fernando Valley
After a rough week full of cheating and drug abuse allegations
leaked by Kris Jenner
, Lamar Odom emerged out of hiding yesterday and was spotted at Taco Bell. Oh god, I hope he didn't get one of those Crunchwrap Supremes. I seriously can't stop eating those things. They're like crack.
On second thought, maybe that was a bad analogy.*25 Lamar Odom pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom arriving on a flight at LAX airport
After going AWOL for a few days, Lamar Odom has been found. TMZ
says Khloe Kardashian is meeting with him at a secret location in the wake of the bombshells that were dropped about him this weekend (he's addicted to crack, Khloe kicked him out of the house after a failed intervention, she hired private investigators to follow him around, yada yada yada):
Lamar has plunged into the dark world of crack cocaine and Khloe effectively separated from him after throwing him out of the house last Wednesday when he rejected a family intervention.
Sources connected to the family tell us Khloe did not want to burden her family and jeopardize the Kardashian machine by telling the brood about Lamar's drug issues. We're told Kourtney and Kim Kardashian learned of Lamar's addiction "very recently." We're told Kris Jenner has known about it for a longer period of time, but was still kept in the dark for many months.
We're told Khloe has not given up on Lamar although she says she will never get back with him until he's clean. On the other hand, we've learned she has taken no steps to file for divorce because she believes there's still a chance Lamar can be saved.
I don't want to say the Kardashians are a bad and destructive influence on people, but before Lamar married Khloe: two NBA championships and a Sixth Man of the Year award. Afterwards: crack addiction. Fucking crack
. And before you start criticizing him, you deal with Kris Jenner for a week without sparking up a rock or two. Damn near impossible.
*15 Lamar Odom pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian arriving at Sirius Studios in New York
(2/1) Life & Style
says Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom are on a "trial separation" right now due to the face that Lamar really really really wants to nail some NBA groupies on the Clippers road trip. Well, duh:
"He told Khloe he needs time to think and be away from her," an insider shares. "He feels completely smothered by her. He feels like he has lost a lot of himself in their marriage and being a part of the whole Kardashian machine, and he is over it."
Lamar's first night away was Jan. 28 -- and he didn't waste any time falling back into his bad habits. An insider says he was back to "partying and talking to other women," just days into the break. In fact, an eyewitness tells Life & Style on Jan. 31 Lamar was grinding with a scantily clad brunette at Bloke & 4th in Toronto. "They were into each other and majorly flirting," a fellow clubgoer tells Life & Style. "At one point, Lamar sat down, took off his knit cap, and the woman was right there rubbing his head."
"Lamar just wants to be with his teammates and friends and let loose -- he and Khloe were barely speaking when he left for his road games," the insider adds. "I wouldn't be surprised if he moved out after this separation. He is completely checked out."
Wow, I just caught myself there. Sorry, I was about to go on a rant regarding the end of the Kardashian era, but Team KKK has fooled me before. I'll give them credit for going to the same well and not getting called out on it by anyone except yours truly. Look, Lamar got what he wanted out of this relationship -- an upgrade from main stage slutty strippers to champagne room classy strippers. Khloe will be fine, too. Now she can play innocent victim to an evil NBA villain, just like her enlarging sister, Kim. But really, who cares. The only K I had a hard-on for was Kourtney, but now she's just a baby-shitting machine. Let's get those two youngsters
a little more seasoned so I can speak on the subject without getting child services involved.*10 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Lamar Odom hearts strippers
Khloe Kardashian, Lamar Odom has been getting a ton of ass. Life & Style
says that "ass" has not been Khloe Kardashian's. Awk. Ward.
While at [Downtown Cabaret] in the heart of Minneapolis [on Jan. 16], an eyewitness tells Life & Style, Lamar and some of his Clippers teammates were escorted from a private booth on the side of the main stage into the $500-per-hour Champagne Room where Lamar handed out roughly $2,000 while enjoying extra attention from a stripper named "Jasmine."
"She'll do anything back there [in the Champagne room]," a co-worker revealed. "She was all over him!" And Jasmine got rewarded handsomely for her attentiveness, admitting Lamar took good care of her, and that Jan. 16 was her most profitable night in weeks. "I can't wait until he comes back. He promised!"
As Life & Style previously reported, over the past few months, Lamar has been spotted boozing, flirting and partying it up with pretty girls at clubs all over the country, while Khloe is nowhere in sight.
What hope do the rest of us have if a fake relationship as strong as Lamar and Khloe's can't survive? It's a shame -- I really wanted to see if they'd be the first couple to have an interspecies baby. Oh well, clearly Lamar is ready to give up being a Kardashian . . . by acting like one. It looks like Khloe will just have to find another guy "her type" to lay her eggs in. I'm sure the NFL, NBA, and NHL are on high alert . . . just kidding about the NHL (obviously).*15 Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Lamar Odom on Khloe Kardashian: She's "not small"
I mean, right? That's what he's hinting at here. When asked about a sex tape of Khloe and him being leaked, Lamar Odom told Playboy
"When people see us in person, they see Khloe's not small. I’m not small. People see us and are probably like, Damn, I wonder how that looks. We wouldn’t have anything to be ashamed about, but no, that’s not going down."
Sorry Lamar, there's only one type of person that looks at you and Khloe and actually thinks about what the two of you look like in bed: anorexics. Imagining that beast and Shrek-body-double (you decide which is which) getting it on is a better appetite suppressant than
listening to a George Clooney acceptance speech.*16 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery: