Robert Pattinson hates Kristen Stewart
Robert Pattinson really hates that bitch. Of course the bitch I'm talking about is his cheating ex Kristen Stewart. Robert was supposed to promote his new film The Childhood of a Leader
at the Venice Film Festival this week, but Kristen had to go and ruin everything with her existence. Screw you, existence! From the New York Post
Pattinson, who was scheduled to attend for "The Childhood of a Leader," which screened this past Saturday and Sunday, had backed out of the fest with the excuse that he's busy shooting "The Lost City of Z" in Ireland.
But sources tell us Pattinson never planned on coming. "He didn't want the story to be all about how he and Kristen were nearly bumping into each other," says a spy. "Venice is very small...and there are only so many parties and hotels."
Stewart was at the festival Saturday to promote "Equals" with Nicholas Hoult.
This reminds me a lot of the awkwardness with my ex. Just replace 'Venice" with "Olive Garden" and this story might as well be about me. I'm practically a movie star.
*20 pictures total in the gallery:
Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile out and about in L.A.
Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile aren't even pretending anymore. The two "close friends" were draped all over each other while out for lunch on Memorial Day. I'm beginning to think Alicia was lying when she said she wanted to kiss Kristen "just for practice." Oldest trick in the book.
*25 Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile pictures total in the gallery:
Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile out and about in Santa Monica
I don't know why people keep insisting that Kristen Stewart is dating her assistant Alicia Cargile. My guy friends and I often steal the occasional touch of each others' asses. That's completely normal behavior.*20 Kristen Stewart pictures total in the gallery:
Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile leaving a coffee shop in Los Feliz
Here's Kristen Stewart and her maybe girlfriend Alicia Cargile in Los Feliz earlier this week. It's been rumored that these two have been dating for months. Which is ridiculous of course. I'm tired of everyone always making dating jokes just because two girls spend a lot of time together. For example, take Kristen and Alicia. They could just be fucking. No strings attached. WHERE'S YOUR JOKES NOW, SMART ASS!
*30 Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile pictures total in the gallery:
Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile in Los Feliz
After breaking Robert Pattinson's heart in the most public way possible
, Kristen Stewart is rumored to be hooking up with her assistant, Alicia Cargile. Earlier this week the two were spotted leaving a restaurant in Los Feliz. I'm sorry, but I'm just not buying it. With their short hair, baggy clothing, and ratty old Converse, these two don't look like lesbians at all. Where's their blonde hair? And bleached assholes? I don't think Pornhub would just lie about that.
*30 Kristen Stewart pictures total in the gallery:
Kristen Stewart departing on a flight at LAX airport
You gotta hand it to Robert Pattinson. It took months for him to start trash-talking his ex Kristen Stewart, but now that he's at it, he wants everyone to know that she's a stupid ugly bitch. From OK!
Robert Pattinson, 28, was overheard trash-talking his cheating ex Kristen Stewart, 24, at a recent party in L.A. "After a few beers, he started going on about Kristen's new haircut, saying she looks dreadful and that he never would've let her do that when they were together," says the source. He even started questioning her sexuality, the source adds, given the short cut and the fact that Kristen has really only been seen with girls since their split. While it's not Rob's style to be so nasty, the source claims his friends were encouraging it: "Even though he insists that he doesn't miss her, it's obvious that he's still in pain."
Claiming that you don't think about your ex while talking shit about them is a clear sign that you haven't moved on. It's why I'm always badmouthing Alessandra Ambrosio, Sofia Vergara, and Kate Beckinsale. Sure, after they left me each of them claimed they were just using me for my body, but that hurts -- I have feelings, too. For example, I have a feeling that that burning sensation I get when I pee came from that whore Megan Fox. See? There I go again. I guess I still can't get over all the great sex we used to have. What an amazing few years that was.*15 Kristen Stewart pictures total in the gallery:
Kristen Stewart filming Anesthesia in New York
*shakes head in disgust* . . . A source told omg!
"Rob [Pattinson] is still in love with Kristen [Stewart] and can't keep away from her. They've been meeting secretly at production studios and at [mutual friend Shannon Woodward's] flat. The three of them have been close friends for years and all look out for each other.
"He's tried flirting with other girls, partying and putting distance between them but there's no other woman for him. His sister Lizzie has told him to follow his deepest feelings and to not by swayed by pressure from Hollywood, because his management and publicists want him to move on and leave his 'troubled' relationship with Kristen behind."
It's a cryin' shame, I tells ya. Big Bobby P. could have been motorboating the hell out of Katy Perry's titties or nailing every slutty USC sorority girl that exists for the last few months if he wasn't so hung up on his ex. Hell, it seemed as if Robert was Hollywood's lost puppy dog for a few months there, judging by how many starlets shamelessly pined for his affection. It's just too bad for those chicks that Robert prefers to be some second-rate director's sloppy seconds. Robert, dude, Kristen fucked Rupert Sanders, not Martin Scorsese. Lose her number already.*10 Kristen Stewart pictures total in the gallery:
Kristen Stewart on the set of Camp X-Ray in L.A.
Make millions of dollars. Go to school. Kristen Stewart is doing this backwards. From the Mirror
[Kristen Stewart] is going back to school, and doing a full-on degree. Robert Pattinson's on/off girlfriend has enrolled at America's prestigious UCLA to study English Literature - while carrying on with her film commitments, too.
A source revealed: "Yes, Kristen's a Tinseltown actress worth millions but she is already considering a life after film. She never got to complete college and she wants to get a proper education. She is a voracious reader and cannot wait to get going on her correspondence course. It won't be easy and it will mean putting in some fairly strenuous hours. But once she's graduated, Kristen will be able to do almost anything she wants, in or out of Hollywood."
"Don't be a fool, stay in school" - Great western philosophizer and one hell of a snappy dresser, Mr. T, circa 1984
Although I think it's lovely that Kristen wants to better herself, both as a person and an actress, why is she taking classes on English Lit when she so clearly needs classes on acting? I mean, come on, her emotional range consists of the face we all make when we get caught farting in an elevator -- or when we get caught banging married directors behind the backs of our supposed significant others. Who knows, maybe a few years of book learnin' will smarten her up some, just like college helped Amanda Bynes.*20 Kristen Stewart pictures total in the gallery:
Robert Pattinson leaving Kristen Stewart's house in Hollywood
After being publicly humiliated
by her cheating ass last year, Robert Pattinson may be back with Kristen Stewart. He was spotted leaving her house in Los Feliz on Sunday after being there for a few hours. According to the paparazzo, Rob "looked nervous" and was "trying to be discreet" as he left. Well yeah, I'd be nervous too if I was hiding the fact that I HAD NO TESTICLES WHATSOEVER. Rob, Kristen Stewart looks like Kristen Stewart, not Kate Upton. Unless she can blow bubbles and shoot ping pong balls out of her vagina like a seasoned Thai whore, you need to delete her number and never talk to her again.*5 Robert Pattinson pictures total in the gallery:
Paparazzi photos from Thursday, June 13
visiting an office in Beverly Hills (pics start here
leaving The Lowry Hotel in Manchester, UK (pics start here
waiting for a ride in London (pics start here
and Mary-Kate Olsen
out and about in New York (pics start here
getting lunch at Little Dom's in Los Feliz (pics start here
shopping at Whole Foods in Santa Monica (pics start here
arriving at a music studio in Los Angeles (pics start here
arriving at a yoga class in Beverly Hills (pics start here
doing an interview for EXTRA
at The Grove in Hollywood (pics start here
leaving a jewelry store in Beverly Hills (pics start here
leaving a gym in West Hollywood (pics start here
out and about in Miami (pics start here
*125 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery: