Kris Jenner

Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian in 2009

Kris Jenner actually pressured Reggie Bush to call his ex/her daughter, Kim Kardashian, on the night of her wedding to boost ratings for the special that ran on E!. Wow. Despite that, Reggie's still thinking about getting back together with Kim. Run Reggie. Run as far away from this family as you can, Forrest Gump style. A source told the National Enquirer:

"Reggie would take Kim back, but he's making it absolutely clear he doesn't want their romance to appear on her show. He refuses to have the cameras follow his every step with Kim and record their private conversations."

Reggie, who plays for the Miami Dolphins, has already butted heads with Kim's mother/manager Kris Jenner over her request that he phone Kim the night of her wedding, which was filmed for a two-part special on the E! network, according to the source. "Kris wanted to have Reggie call Kim for ratings," the source revealed, "He wouldn't do it." (Print Edition - 12/12)

So Kris Jenner was trying to pimp her daughter to another man on her wedding day for the sake of ratings? This, my friends, is what I call par for the course. Nothing about these slugs shocks me anymore. It wouldn't surprise me if it were to come out that Kris was holding the camera during Kim's interracial porno with Moesha's less-talented little brother. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't bet against Kris tongue-polishing Reggie Bush's cervix-smasher before he plows into fatty if it meant getting a mention on TMZ TV. Wow, who would have thought that Robert Kardashian would be the one with at least a shred of dignity in this family?

*5 Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

Honestly, who the hell would read this book?

Another day, another story about a Kardashian's shameless attempts to make a buck. In this case, we have Kris Jenner ruthlessly squeezing nickels out of "mommy bloggers." From the New York Post:

Jenner, who has done a grueling series of TV appearances this week to insist that Kim didn't profit from her mega-televised wedding to Kris Humphries, took time for a book launch at The Darby on Wednesday night to make some of her own money. Spies at the event said publisher Simon and Schuster brought along 100 books for Jenner to sign, but instead of giving them to the invited guests for free, as is usual, they set up a credit-card machine, charging all the mommy bloggers for their personalized copies. "They even had a fanny pack on hand to collect cash," said a source.

What is Kris' infatuation with money? Even when she's promoting her own product, the greedy bitch won't give anything away for free. Of course, you can't really blame Kris for charging these people for copies of her book. Anyone pathetic enough to drive to a store and wait in line to meet Kris Jenner deserves to get fleeced. And put down Old Yeller style.

*12 Kris Jenner pictures total in the gallery:

Kris Jenner is pulling the strings

The matriarch of the Kardashian family, Kris Jenner, is appearing on The Today Show this morning to talk about her daughter Kim's divorce. One subject that I'm sure won't come up is the fiscal crisis in Europe how she's basically pulling the strings on everything. From The Hollywood Reporter:

An insider also told The Hollywood Reporter that Jenner -- who serves as the family's business manager -- made sure that Kardashian and Humphries' divorce was announced on Monday in time for coverage in the weekly magazines, which go to deadline that day.

The Kardashians unleashed multiple statements to the media Monday (making sure to first give them to E! News, which airs their reality show, and thus pays their bills), before the ink was dry on the divorce filing.

If you think Kris is manipulating her daughters like a puppet on a string, you're wrong. She's manipulating us. The fact that she timed the announcement of her daughter's divorce to coincide with the tabloids' deadlines is disgusting, repugnant, and exactly what you'd expect from a woman that sees her children as an ATM. Speaking of ATM, I hear Kim might be getting back together with Ray-J.

That last line is much funnier if you click the link.

*10 Kris Jenner pictures total in the gallery:

Khloe Kardashian really loves cake(s)

Kim Kardashian, Kris Humphries, Kris Jenner, and Rob Kardashian went wedding cake-tasting at Hansen's Cakes in Beverly Hills on Friday. Oh, and Khloe Kardashian also partook in the tasting. She was actually already there eating cake (her 2 P.M. tradition) when Kim and everyone else walked in -- she didn't even know they were coming. What a lucky coincidence!

*51 Kardashian family pictures total in the gallery:

Kim Kardashian leaving the Hermes boutique in Paris (9/15)

Kim Kardashian has been on vacation the past week or so in Paris. And like most tourists, she's bringing home some souvenirs: a snow globe, a magnet, . . . $100,000 in handbags. From TMZ:

It all went down in the notoriously expensive Hermes store -- where we're told Kim and her mother Kris purchased six of the label's exclusive "Birkin" bags ... valued at around $10,000 apiece. But here's the kicker -- sources close to the reality star tell TMZ, Kim also bought herself an extremely rare crocodile-skin bag from the upscale French boutique ... worth around $30,000.

Overall, the Kardashians easily surpassed the $100k mark.

In related news, I just got my bus pass laminated. No more passes ruined when I accidentally sit in a puddle of urine anymore, baby!

*10 Kim Kardashian Paris pictures total in the gallery:

Kourtney, Khloe and Kim Kardashian at the Beach Bunny Swimwear fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week SWIM in Miami (7/16)

It's been whispered for years, but now In Touch Weekly is claiming that Kourtney Kardashian's prince-charming-of-a-husband Scott Disick is considering an offer to write a "scathing" tell-all about the Kardashian family in which he'll reveal that Khloe -- you know, the Kardashian sister who's a foot taller than her sisters -- is the product of an affair Kris Jenner had with a pool boy 26 years ago. The pool boy? How clichéd. From Hollywood Life:

“[Scott] has vowed not to sell out Kourtney personally but he doesn’t mind talking about the rest of the family,” a source tells In Touch Weekly. “He really can’t stand to be in the same room with Kris.”

Besides trying to expand on his reality stardom, the 27-year-old wants to expose the Kardashian matriarch, Kris Jenner, as a lying, and manipulative woman. But there’s one secret In Touch Weekly is reporting that Scott, 31, has kept under wraps for years — one that could tear their family apart. One of the main focuses of Scott’s expose will be to reveal that Khloe Kardashian is not an actual “Kardashian,” and that she’s the product of a love affair with Kris’ former pool boy.

I knew André the Giant had some financial difficulties back in the early '80s, but I didn't know he resorted to cleaning pools for a living. How embarrassing.

*10 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Thursday, April 1

Bradley Cooper on the set of The Dark Fields in New York (pics start here)

Jaime Pressley out and about in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Aubrey O'Day outside Katsuya restaurant in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Jennifer Garner shopping in Santa Monica (pics start here)

Kris Jenner out and about in Miami (pics start here)

Pete Wentz and his son Bronx in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Dannii Minogue at Perth Airport in Australia (pics start here)

Nicky Hilton outside BOA steakhouse in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Meg Ryan on her way to yoga class in Santa Monica (pics start here)

Raquel Welch promoting her new book Beyond The Cleavage: The Real Story Behind The Sex Symbol at Barnes & Noble in New York (pics start here)

Selena Gomez at a signing session at a C&A store in Paris (pics start here)

Tina Fey at Schoenefeld Airport in Berlin (pics start here)

*137 pics total in the gallery