Kourtney Kardashian


Paparazzi photos from Monday, August 18

Kourtney Kardashian leaving The Driver's Seat restaurant in Southampton (pics start here)

Italian model Laura Cremaschi at the beach in Miami (pics start here)

Minka Kelly leaving a gym in L.A. (pics start here)

David Beckham arriving at SoulCycle in Brentwood (pics start here)

Amanda Seyfried on the set of Ted 2 on the Massachusetts Turnpike (Route 90) in Boston (pics start here)

Al Pacino and his girlfriend Lucila Sola out for dinner in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Vanessa Hudgens leaving Pressed Juicery in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Jared Leto leaving his hotel in New York (pics start here)

Miley Cyrus performing her Bangerz Tour at the United Center in Chicago (pics start here)

Busy Phillips leaving a gym in L.A. (pics start here)

Nicole Scherzinger shopping in L.A. (pics start here)

Kris Jenner and a mystery man arriving for dinner at Craig's restaurant in West Hollywood (pics start here)

*107 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kourtney Kardashian Procreator 1
  • Kourtney Kardashian Procreator 2
  • Kourtney Kardashian Procreator 3
  • Kourtney Kardashian Procreator 4
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  • Kourtney Kardashian Procreator 1
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  • Kourtney Kardashian Procreator 20

Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick leaving Suki Zuki in Watermill, New York (8/10)

In what absolutely doesn't sound like some cheap plot drama for their new reality show, Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick filed a police report with the Southampton Town Police after $4k went missing from the bedroom of their modest, $13.9 million rental home. What, couldn't spring for the $15 million villa? From Radar:
While on Long Island filming their spinoff Kourtney and Khloé Take The Hamptons, Scott Disick called the police about a burglar who stole pricey property from inside their summer mega-mansion, RadarOnline.com has learned.

Kourtney's flashy baby daddy made the complaint to Southampton Town Police on July 8 around 4 p.m. and told officers that between Jul. 1-4, an "unknown person did unlawfully remove" the cash "from an attache case that was stored in a bedroom."

The case is currently being classified as third-degree grand larceny, which is a felony. The report doesn't indicate there was any damage done to the $13.9 million waterfront rental.
Perhaps the most troubling aspect of this story isn't that someone broke into Kourtney and Scott's home and stole $4k; it's that it took them three days to notice it was missing. If I had $4k in cash, I'd guard it like the crown jewels. But not Scott -- he just leaves it laying around the house in an attache case like a fucking Bond villain. I've never wanted someone to intentionally die of ebola before, but this asshole is seriously testing my patience.

*30 Kourtney Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 1
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 2
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 3
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 4
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 5
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  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 15
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 1
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 2
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 3
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  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 13
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 14
  • Kourtney Scott Robbery 15

Kourtney Kardashian and Kendall Jenner in Southampton (7/1)

Here's some Kardashian bikini pics from last week that just got released for download. All the important ones are there: Kourtney, Kendall, Kylie, and Mildred, who lives under the stairs. Kris gave her a chance to earn her keep, but bitch couldn't produce. The groceries don't buy themselves, and unfortunately Mildred had to learn that the hard way.

*30 Kardashian bikini pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 1
  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 2
  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 3
  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 4
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  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 15
  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 1
  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 2
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  • Kardashians Bikini Butts 15

The Kardashian sisters at the grand opening of DASH in Miami (3/12)

The Kardashians are bringing their brand of class to the Hamptons this summer via their DASH boutique, and surprisingly, not all residents are thrilled about it. From the New York Post:
Restaurateur Irma Herzog has drawn the ire of residents by leasing her property, an art gallery space adjacent to her Driver's Seat Restaurant, to Khloé and Kourtney, who are expected rent a nearby mansion.

A source said, "Southamptonites are abuzz that Irma Herzog has betrayed their village . . . Will Irma also be bringing back another bout of hepatitis? [Last year a worker was diagnosed with hep A, but inspectors later gave the restaurant a clean bill.] Now she brings trash to her backyard. People are lining up to buy Irma's property and get her out of town. She is a piranha."
Irma Herzog might be the biggest twat on the island, but guess what? Being compared unfavorably to hepatitis is no big deal to a Kardashian. Hell, Kim wears sexually transmitted diseases like a badge of honor. The bitches of Southampton will need to bring it harder than that if they expect Team KKK to feel humbled. Now, I don't want to make a bad situation worse, but if the good people of SoHamp have a problem with classless bores, then they might want to box-out Howard Stern.

*20 pictures total in the gallery:

  • Dash Hamptons 1
  • Dash Hamptons 2
  • Dash Hamptons 3
  • Dash Hamptons 4
  • Dash Hamptons 5
  • Dash Hamptons 6
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  • Dash Hamptons 1
  • Dash Hamptons 2
  • Dash Hamptons 3
  • Dash Hamptons 4
  • Dash Hamptons 5

Kourtney Kardashian celebrating her birthday in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico (4/19)

Isn't photoshop amazing? You know what's even more amazing? When you don't use it. Like in these pictures of Kourtney Kardashian in Cabo San Lucas over the weekend. Sorry, Kourtney, no touching up of these pics. The whole world gets to see that you got fourths on tacos the night before.

*30 Kourtney Kardashian bikini pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 1
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 2
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 3
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 4
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 5
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  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 11
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  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 15
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 1
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 2
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 3
  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 4
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  • Kourtney Kardashian Cabo Bikini Butt 15

Khloe Kardashian and Kourtney Kardashian leaving The Rug Company in West Hollywood (4/12)

LOL! While shopping in West Hollywood over the weekend, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian were glitter bombed, with Khloe suffering the brunt of the attack (bigger target). Making things worse is that the glitter bombing was done by one of the creepier looking clowns I think I've ever seen. Oh, those poor little lambs, Khloe especially. She hasn't had that much tacky glitter all over her face since that morning when she was doing her makeup. Seriously, glitter is like crack to a Kardashan sister. It's like attacking Kris Jenner with a handful of twenties.

*32 glitter bombing pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kardashian Glitter Bomb 1
  • Kardashian Glitter Bomb 2
  • Kardashian Glitter Bomb 3
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  • Kardashian Glitter Bomb 1
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  • Kardashian Glitter Bomb 14
  • Kardashian Glitter Bomb 15

The Kardashian Kids clothing collection

The Kardashian Kids clothing collection officially launches in Babies 'R' Us stores nationwide this week. Designed for girls ages 0-24 months, the collection is perfect for those parents wanting to introduce their newborns to the exciting world of looking like you fuck on the first date. What parent could pass that up? I almost want to have kids now.

*5 Kardashian Kids pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kardashian Kids Launch 1
  • Kardashian Kids Launch 2
  • Kardashian Kids Launch 3
  • Kardashian Kids Launch 4
  • Kardashian Kids Launch 5

Khloe Kardashian and Kourtney Kardashian leaving their hotel in New York (2/17)

Khloe Kardashian stood up for animal rights over the weekend, wearing a fur coat with the phrase "FXCK YO FUR" spray-painted in red on the back (she's not good at spelling). Above is Khloe leaving her hotel in New York. In front is her sister Kourtney. Holding an alligator skin purse. *face palm*

*25 Khloe Kardashian fur pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Kardashian Fur Protest 1
  • Khloe Kardashian Fur Protest 2
  • Khloe Kardashian Fur Protest 3
  • Khloe Kardashian Fur Protest 4
  • Khloe Kardashian Fur Protest 5
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The Kardashians are going out Heaven's Gate style

Kris Jenner says when the Kardashians finally retire as a reality family, they're going out all at once . . . with E! filing bankruptcy shortly after. Kris said:
"We made a deal with one another when we shot the first episode that if someone is not having a good time we'll have to stop, and no one has ever said they're not having a good time I think we're having the time of our lives."
So the only thing keeping Team KKK on TV is whether or not the sows are happily producing cultural poison? Well, since being off TV is like death to these people, I believe a Heaven's Gate-style exit suits them perfectly. Hopefully Kanye will be a full member by the time the UFO flies by so he can join in on the tequila and cyanide shots . . . who are we kidding? -- this family isn't going anywhere. After all, it was Kris who promised her money makers that she'd quit as soon as they weren't having fun, and we've all heard how much she honors promises made to her family . . . specifically husbands.

*10 Kardashian family pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kardashian Family Retirement 1
  • Kardashian Family Retirement 2
  • Kardashian Family Retirement 3
  • Kardashian Family Retirement 4
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  • Kardashian Family Retirement 10

Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick catching a flight at Miami International Airport (11/23)

Kourtney Kardashian's baby daddy Scott Disick has allegedly moved out of the Kardashian Kompound in Calabasas and into the Montage Beverly Hills Hotel. And he's already cheating on her. With a woman whose name might not begin with the letter K. Kris Jenner is gonna be so pissed. From In Touch Weekly:
And while Kourtney is used to Scott's partying and volatility, his behavior at the Montage on Dec. 6 will be a devastating surprise. An eyewitness tells In Touch that Scott was spotted getting cozy with a sexy brunette.

"The woman was in her 20s and exotic-looking," recalls patron Thomas Johnson, who spotted the pair in the lobby. "She was pulling a small suitcase on wheels and Scott put both his arms around the small of her back, kissed her on the cheek and whispered into her ear. When Scott pulled back, he kept his hand on her hips and leaned back, as if to check her out."

Johnson tells In Touch, "The way he touched her and the way they looked at each other suggested they were a lot more than friends. A man with a long-term partner and two children should never behave like that with another woman."
Aw, is Kourtney getting played by a non-Kardashian? How sad. You hear that? That faint sound? It's me playing the world's saddest song on the world's smallest violin. Look, we can all agree that Scott Disick might be the biggest douche rocket in the history of reality television, but at least he's pinching as big a loaf on a Kardashian as the Kardashians are on Western culture. This is how the Universe puts itself back into balance. My spirit guide tells me that having one family act as shamelessly as Team KKK is the reason why children starve in Africa and why the Raiders will NEVER win another Super Bowl, and he's never wrong. Of course, my spirit guide is the ghost of a dog who only speaks to me after I down a fifth of Jack, so you can probably disregard everything I just wrote.

*15 Scott Disick and Kourtney Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kourtney Scott Problems 1
  • Kourtney Scott Problems 2
  • Kourtney Scott Problems 3
  • Kourtney Scott Problems 4
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