Kirstie Alley


Kirstie Alley out and about in New York (12/4)

I know Kirstie Alley thinks she looks amazing, but wearing four layers of ridiculously-constricting Spanx is not the same as four hours of working out. Someone get this chick some oxygen.

*20 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Spanx 1
  • Kirstie Alley Spanx 2
  • Kirstie Alley Spanx 3
  • Kirstie Alley Spanx 4
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  • Kirstie Alley Spanx 18
  • Kirstie Alley Spanx 19
  • Kirstie Alley Spanx 20

Kirstie Alley at a restaurant in L.A. (11/26)

That's Kirstie Alley eating lunch at a restaurant in L.A. on Monday. No big deal, right? Except she originally arrived at the restaurant for breakfast on Friday. She's that hungry, my friends. She's that hungry.

*5 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Noshing 1
  • Kirstie Alley Noshing 2
  • Kirstie Alley Noshing 3
  • Kirstie Alley Noshing 4
  • Kirstie Alley Noshing 5

Kirstie Alley backstage at Dancing With The Stars in Hollywood (10/9)

Kirstie Alley tells Entertainment Tonight that she and Patrick Swayze fell in love during the taping of the miniseries North and South in 1985, but they never acted on it in a naked kind of way. Judging by what happened to her body from 1985 to now, that's probably for the best.
Kirstie Alley reveals to Entertainment Tonight's Chris Jacobs intimate details about what she says was a powerful attraction and hidden relationship with North and South co-star, Patrick Swayze.  Although both stars were married during filming of the mini-series, Alley tells Jacobs when she first saw Swayze, they had an intense attraction and she tried to avoid "going down that road" but they ultimately fell in love.

"Both of us were married.  We did not have an affair.  But again, I think what I did was worse.  Because I think when you fall in love with someone when you're married you jeopardize your own marriage and their marriage.  It's doubly bad," said Alley.

Alley goes on to say that although she's friends with Patrick's wife, Lisa, who asked Alley to speak at Swayze's funeral, she is uncertain if Lisa is aware of their relationship.
Oh this is just great. Tell the world that you and the guy who died in 2009 -- so he can't actually refute your claims -- were secretly in love all these years. Even if it's true, have a fucking heart and keep it to yourself, you stupid bitch. His widow Lisa must be absolutely thrilled by this. Maybe Kirstie can stop by her house later and punch her in the throat.

*20 Kirstie Alley pics total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 1
  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 2
  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 3
  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 4
  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 5
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  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 11
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  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 18
  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 19
  • Kirstie Alley Patrick Swayze 20

Kirstie Alley on the set of Dancing with the Stars in Hollywood (10/9)

True story: On Tuesday, a production assistant for Dancing with the Stars tried to grab Kirstie Alley's sandwich and rush her to set because she was a little late. He no longer has a right arm and is currently fighting for his life. KIRSTIE ALLEY FEED.

*20 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Feeding 1
  • Kirstie Alley Feeding 2
  • Kirstie Alley Feeding 3
  • Kirstie Alley Feeding 4
  • Kirstie Alley Feeding 5
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  • Kirstie Alley Feeding 19
  • Kirstie Alley Feeding 20

Kirstie Alley leaving Bouchon Bistro in Beverly Hills (10/6)

Kirstie Alley attended a Cheers 30th reunion dinner in Beverly Hills on Saturday, and . . . wait a minute, is that former MTV Sports host Dan Cortese? Holy shit, Dan Cortese is banging Kirstie Alley. Dan Cortese is a chubby chaser. If he didn't currently work at a car wash, that might be a really embarrassing revelation. Instead, you know, whatever. "Hey asshole, my mirror has streaks on it!"

*7 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Drunk Face 1
  • Kirstie Alley Drunk Face 2
  • Kirstie Alley Drunk Face 3
  • Kirstie Alley Drunk Face 4
  • Kirstie Alley Drunk Face 5

Kirstie Alley promoting her new book The Art of Men at the Book Expo in New York (6/7)

After losing a ton of weight on Dancing with the Stars, Kirstie Alley is back to her old size, which is somewhere between "HUGE" and "Ma'am, we don't carry your size in stock -- have you tried online?" A source told the National Enquirer:
"Kirstie's under a lot of pressure to get her [new book The Art of Men] done, so she's been holed up at her homes in Florida and Kansas over the last few months writing."
Florida and Kansas? Typical one percenter.
"Her weight seems to fluctuate with her moods. Based on her appearance in New York, she's clearly gorging on food again and has hit 200 pounds. She's trying to hide her bloated body in big, loose dresses, but she's not fooling anyone."
So what if Kirstie put on a few dozen pounds? The old battle axe is in her sixties -- the fight to stay sexy ended long ago. Sure, Kirstie was smoking hot in the early 80s, but nobody cares anymore. For most of you reading this, you were conceived with Kirstie's picture pinned to the headboard -- your mom's head was crashing into it while taking the cock (did it just get hot in here?). Anyways, it's time for Kirstie to just give up and be happy weighing a quarter of a ton. Besides, it's not like she has a career to worry about anymore.

*21 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Weight Regain 1
  • Kirstie Alley Weight Regain 2
  • Kirstie Alley Weight Regain 3
  • Kirstie Alley Weight Regain 4
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  • Kirstie Alley Weight Regain 20

Kirstie Alley out and about in L.A. (11/4)

+ Scarlett Johansson in tight jeans [Caught on Set]

+ Holy shit Rebecca Romijn looks AMAZING in a bikini [Drunken Stepfather]
+ Something about Jennifer Aniston's breasts [The Superficial]
+ Bar Refaeli upskirt! (site NSFW) [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ Julianne Hough looking hot [Celebuzz]

+ Kristen Stewart is a weirdo [Evil Beet]
+ This bitch is crazy [Socialite Life]
+ Those are some spectacular boobies [Double Viking]
+ Amber Heard is absolutely beautiful [I'm Not Obsessed]

LIST OF THE DAY: 20 surprising things about the Duggars

*27 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 1
  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 2
  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 3
  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 4
  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 5
  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 6
  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 7
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  • Kirstie Alley Smoking 25

Kirstie Alley arriving to the Vera Wang show during Fashion Week in New York (9/13)

Even though I'm not sure she's technically still famous, Kirstie Alley went into full "A-list star mode" last Sunday and demanded a helicopter. So, what's the big deal? It was to fly her into the "Long Island Remembers" 9/11 10th anniversary tribute. Um, maybe that's a day to tone it down a little, Kirstie? Ya think? From the New York Post:
Steve Carl, of Carlyle on the Green, offered Alley transportation to the charitable commemoration, but reps for the restaurant told Page Six they were shocked to hear her “demand” for a helicopter landing, showbiz-style, in the middle of the polo field. Alley was informed it wouldn’t be possible to charter a chopper, since it did not comply with airspace restrictions set for Sept. 11.

“She had a set of demands that she wanted met before she made the appearance,” Leslie Gonzalez, an event organizer who reps Carlyle on the Green, told us. But, “She almost canceled the appearance because she couldn’t get a helicopter.”

Another restaurant rep chimed in, “We couldn’t believe it. It’s a memorial service, not a party.”
Can you really blame Kirstie for requesting a helicopter to bring her to the memorial? It's my understanding that a Boeing CH-47D Chinook has a load capacity of more than 33,000 pounds. Frankly, considering the sentimentality and importance of the event, Kirstie should have made a more reasonable request for transportation -- like a semi-truck or forklift. 

*5 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley 911 Demands 1
  • Kirstie Alley 911 Demands 2
  • Kirstie Alley 911 Demands 3
  • Kirstie Alley 911 Demands 4
  • Kirstie Alley 911 Demands 5

Kirstie Alley returning to her hotel in Manhattan (6/26)

WARNING: This might quite possibly be the most disturbing thing you ever read in your life. From In Touch Weekly:
Seems Dancing With the Stars not only gave Kirstie Alley a better figure, but also a seemingly newfound confidence to pursue younger men! And now an insider is telling In Touch she is trying to lure her potential hook-ups by promising to make them stars. Kirstie, 60, has been hitting lots of hotspots in New York and scoping out the crowd for hotties in their twenties. According to the insider, once she manages to get a guy’s number, she starts texting. "She says, 'Wanna hang out? Wanna have dinner? I'll pay for it,' and 'I can get you a movie role,' in order for guys to respond to her. She's a total cougar!"
Oh I see how it is. Kirstie is promising these younger men movie roles in return for sexual favors, but I do the same with grades and suddenly I'm deemed "unfit to be a high school teacher" and forced to live "at least 500 feet away" from schools and community centers? Fucking double standards, man.

*10 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 1
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 2
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 3
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 4
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 5
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 6
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 7
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 8
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 9
  • Kirstie Alley Casting Couch 10

Kirstie Alley and Ted Volynets out and about in New York (6/16)

Am I trapped in some weird alternate universe where Kirstie Alley is considered attractive and desirable? What the hell is going on? And more importantly, how do I get back to earth? From the National Enquirer:
Just call her a cougar on the loose! Weeks after dumping 21-year-old boyfriend, hip-hop artist Shancie Boyd, Kirstie Alley is robbing the cradle again! The Enquirer caught the 60-year-old former "fat actress" locking lips with professional ballroom dancer Ted Volynets - who's also just 21.

"Kirstie just can't seem to get enough attention from younger guys these days - and she doesn't care who knows it," an insider revealed. "After dropping a lot of her weight, she looks fantastic and hasn't seemed this happy in years. Ted makes kirstie feel young and vibrant again, and since she's in between projects, she decided to hang around New York and just concentrate on having fun with him for a while." But despite their chemistry, Kirstie definitely doesn't see the relationship getting serious, the insider added. "Right now, Kirstie's all about letting the good times roll."
I think that's the first time someone used the word "roll" in a sentence about Kirstie Alley and didn't also use the word "butter."

But anyways, what 21-year-old in his right mind would date a 60-year-old who's going to be so fat in six months that her belly button will make an echo? This guy's either an extreme chubby chaser or a blatant gold digger. Oh wait, the dude's a "professional ballroom dancer"? Then that makes complete sense. These two aren't dating -- they're together because Kirstie needs someone to go shopping for designer handbags with.

*15 Kirstie Alley and Ted Volynet pictures total in the gallery:

  • Kirstie Alley Dating Younger Man 1
  • Kirstie Alley Dating Younger Man 2
  • Kirstie Alley Dating Younger Man 3
  • Kirstie Alley Dating Younger Man 4
  • Kirstie Alley Dating Younger Man 5
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  • Kirstie Alley Dating Younger Man 14
  • Kirstie Alley Dating Younger Man 15

Would You Rather?

Would You Rather...? Spend one night with: