Khloe Kardashian

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via Kate Upton's Snapchat

Do you want to become my new favorite bikini model? Because that's how you become my new favorite bikini model.


Khloe Kardashian arriving at Milk Studios in Hollywood (7/19)

So when do we start referring to Khloe as the "Skinny Kardashian"? God damn. I've had to make a complete 180 degree turn from sasquatch jokes to eating disorder jokes . . . *dusts off some old Nicole Richie posts* . . . Hey, did you hear the one about the reality star who had an eating disorder? She started to break bones more often because of a reduction in bone density due to her self starvation! . . . Aw god dammit the jokes aren't even funny!

*20 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Getting Skinny 1
  • Khloe Getting Skinny 2
  • Khloe Getting Skinny 3
  • Khloe Getting Skinny 4
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Khloe Kardashian leaving a studio in Van Nuys (7/13)

I usually do these "noticeable" posts for two reasons: 1. someone famous has hard nipples, or 2. someone famous has raging cameltoe. In Khloe Kardashian's case, do I have to do two posts for these pictures?

*30 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Kardashian Noticeable Shirt 1
  • Khloe Kardashian Noticeable Shirt 2
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Khloe Kardashian shopping in Beverly Hills (6/15)

Not content to let Miley Cyrus have all the fun, here's Khloe Kardashian going braless last week in Beverly Hills. While Miley no doubt does this kind of shit for attention, I can't help but think Khloe has another motive. "I'M ABLE TO NURSE. PLEASE PUT A BABY IN ME." Your move, Lebron James, Kyrie Irving, Tristan Thompson, Kevin Love, J.R. Smith, Richard Jefferson, Iman Shumpert, or Mo Williams.

*30 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Kardashian Tit Nipple Day 1
  • Khloe Kardashian Tit Nipple Day 2
  • Khloe Kardashian Tit Nipple Day 3
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Khloe Kardashian arriving at Scott Disick's 33rd birthday at Nobu in Malibu (5/26)

Khloe Kardashian filed for divorce from Lamar Odom again. After Lamar overdosed at a brothel in Nevada in October, Khloe canceled the original divorce filing. I guess she's had enough because she just refiled it. From People:
The Keeping up with the Kardashians star filed on Thursday, citing irreconcilable differences, according to court documents obtained by PEOPLE.

The two wed in 2009, just one month after meeting. Kardashian first filed for divorce in December 2013 after he relapsed with his substance abuse problems and cheated, however she called off their protracted divorce following Odom's near-fatal overdose last October.

"This was always the plan. The divorce has never been officially off. Khloe was waiting for the timing to be right," a source tells PEOPLE of Kardashian's filing.
This whole situation sets a dangerous precedent for Khloe's future relationships. Lamar did a bunch of drugs and fucked like eight hookers, and it took her almost a year to file for divorce. Her next husband is gonna be like a fox in a hen house. "C'mon Khloe, I only cheated with two girls and I didn't even have to pay them! That's way better than your last husband!"

*20 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Filing Divorce 1
  • Khloe Filing Divorce 2
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  • Khloe Filing Divorce 1
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Khloe Kardashian (and Kourtney Kardashian) leaving Beyonce's concert in L.A. (5/14)

It's been bugging me, but I finally figured out what Khloe Kardashian's ass looks like. You know when you sit naked on a Xerox machine and hit copy? BAM. There it is. Khloe Kardashian has a Xerox ass.

*20 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Kardashian Concert Ass 1
  • Khloe Kardashian Concert Ass 2
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Kim Kardashian and Brody Jenner in 2007

Don't you dare call Brody Jenner a Kardashian. Just because his dad who became his mom married their mom doesn't mean he was ever part of Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney's family. From Page Six:
Our spy overheard a conversation at Coachella in which a pal praised one-time reality star Jenner for the success of his "family," meaning the Kardashian clan.

We're told Jenner, son of Caitlyn and ex-stepbrother to Kim, Kourtney and Khloé, loudly shot back, "They're not my fucking family!"
My god, the balls on this guy. Kris Jenner is gonna have him drawn and quartered. Brody taking a stand against the Kardashians is like Winston Churchill taking a stand against Adolf Hitler and the Nazis years before World War II. A century from now, when we recall the terror of the Kardashian regime, we'll look down at the eternal flame on his tomb and realize that Brody Jenner was one of the most courageous Americans of all time.

*15 Brody Jenner and Kim Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Brody Kardashian 1
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James Harden and Khloe Kardashian leaving The Nice Guy in West Hollywood last August

Khloe Kardashian revealed on Wednesday's episode of her talk show Kocktails with Khloe that she broke up with NBA star James Harden because, even though he wanted an exclusive relationship, he cheated on her. Oh, so Kris Jenner can have sex with O.J. Simpson but anyone dating her daughters have to remain faithful. Damn double standards.
"[James wanted a commitment]. I was, I mean I wanted it, but I wanted to be realistic. I was like, you know what, it's unfair. I'm working so much right now, you're in Houston, let me just say, we don't need to be committed. Nope. He sought me out, he wanted to be committed, and you know, then wasn't committed, so KoKo had to let him go-go ... I was like great, this guy's in it for the long haul, let's do it," said Khloe. "Uh, found out he wasn't, and I got the receipts to prove it.
Khloe has the "receipts to prove it." So that means either she hired someone to follow James around or snooped through his wallet when he wasn't paying attention. Poor girl. Just hang in there, Khloe -- you'll find the man of your dreams, get married, and live happily ever after in no time. It's often said that the foundation of any great love story are private investigators and a pervading sense of paranoia.

*5 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Kardashian James Harden Cheating 1
  • Khloe Kardashian James Harden Cheating 2
  • Khloe Kardashian James Harden Cheating 3
  • Khloe Kardashian James Harden Cheating 4
  • Khloe Kardashian James Harden Cheating 5
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Khloe Kardashian Photoshop FAIL

I don't mean to alarm anyone, but there may be a supernatural presence stalking Khloe Kardashian. She instagrammed a selfie earlier today after her workout, and there appears to be some kind of space-bending spirit altering the very nature of reality as we know it. Well either that or she photoshopped the picture to give her more impressive muscles. Damn, that seems way easier than actually working out. I think she's on to something here.

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Khloe Kardashian leaving the Trump Soho Hotel in New York (1/13)

Khloe Kardashian told Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens: Live last night that she and Lamar Odom made a sex tape. Hopefully not in the past few months. That would just be weird having to pull all the tubes out and stuff:
"I've definitely recorded myself having sex with my ex-husband," the svelte reality star told host Andy Cohen. "But not like, talking to camera. You remember those little cameras, little video cameras, that was my jam for a moment."

...the tape [is] still in her possession -- "in my safe," she said.... (New York Post)
This is the least newsworthy Kardashian story in the history of this family. Of course Khloe made a sex tape -- she's a Kardashian. It'd be more newsworthy if she did something totally against family tradition. "Breaking: Khloe Kardashian Dating a Nice Jewish Boy."

*10 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

  • Khloe Kardashian Sex Tape 1
  • Khloe Kardashian Sex Tape 2
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