Khloe Kardashian appearing at Westfield Parramatta in Sydney, Australia (11/21)
I don't know what's more shocking about this picture of Khloe Kardashian at a meet-and-greet in Australia last week -- that her ass is now the size of Kim Kardashian's; or that this mall is packed for a Khloe Kardashian meet-and-greet like she's the fucking Beatles. C'mon, Australia, I used to think you were cool. Settle down.
*16 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
The Kardashians throw a yard sale in Woodland Hills (11/10)
Flynet says this is the Kardashian family hosting a yard sale "in which all proceeds would be matched by the family and go to the charities Greater Los Angeles Fisher House Foundation and No Kid Hungry." Yeah, right. You know those panhandlers that ask you for spare change to buy food, but you really know they're gonna take your money and go buy meth with it? This is the higher class version of that. You just bought Kris Jenner a new fucking Bentley, suckers.
*35 Kardashian yard sale pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian shopping at Kitson in Beverly Hills (10/2)
Oh my gosh. Right after a braless Khloe Kardashian rubbed her nipples with ice, the paparazzi happened to show up and take her picture. How mortified she must be. I wouldn't be surprised if she goes into hiding and we never see her again. And by "I wouldn't be surprised if" I mean "please."
*20 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian leaving Maxfield in West Hollywood (9/9)
Despite the strippers, despite the cheating, despite the addiction to crack, despite the disappearing for days at a time, despite the DUI, and despite the fact that he still rents movies from Blockbuster(!), Khloe Kardashian hasn't given up on Lamar Odom. She was spotted wearing her gigantic wedding ring yesterday while shopping in West Hollywood. Or, since this is Khloe Kardashian we're talking about, maybe I'm completely wrong and it's actually one of those ring pops. "Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!"
*20 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Lamar Odom arrested for DUI
Lamar Odom was arrested for DUI at 3:54 this morning after weaving down the 101 freeway at 50 MPH (the fastest anyone has ever gone on the 101). According to TMZ, Lamar failed "numerous" field sobriety tests and was probably under the influence of more than just alcohol:
Deputies at the scene smelled alcohol on Lamar and believe he was under the influence of both drugs and alcohol. The sources say Lamar's driving and conduct were consistent with drugs. We're told there were no drugs or alcohol found in Lamar's car ... only cigarettes, 2 bottles of cologne and other innocuous items.No matter how you feel about the Kardashians, this downward spiral is a pretty sad situation for Lamar and Khloe. I'm just glad other members of the family have somehow summoned the strength to remain positive during this trying time. "Lamar got a DUI? We have our season finale!!!!" - Kris Jenner upon hearing the news this morning.
Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom arriving on a flight at LAX airport (7/17)
After going AWOL for a few days, Lamar Odom has been found. TMZ says Khloe Kardashian is meeting with him at a secret location in the wake of the bombshells that were dropped about him this weekend (he's addicted to crack, Khloe kicked him out of the house after a failed intervention, she hired private investigators to follow him around, yada yada yada):
Lamar has plunged into the dark world of crack cocaine and Khloe effectively separated from him after throwing him out of the house last Wednesday when he rejected a family intervention.I don't want to say the Kardashians are a bad and destructive influence on people, but before Lamar married Khloe: two NBA championships and a Sixth Man of the Year award. Afterwards: crack addiction. Fucking crack. And before you start criticizing him, you deal with Kris Jenner for a week without sparking up a rock or two. Damn near impossible.
Sources connected to the family tell us Khloe did not want to burden her family and jeopardize the Kardashian machine by telling the brood about Lamar's drug issues. We're told Kourtney and Kim Kardashian learned of Lamar's addiction "very recently." We're told Kris Jenner has known about it for a longer period of time, but was still kept in the dark for many months.
We're told Khloe has not given up on Lamar although she says she will never get back with him until he's clean. On the other hand, we've learned she has taken no steps to file for divorce because she believes there's still a chance Lamar can be saved.
*15 Lamar Odom pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian on her way to Jerry's Famous Deli in Calabasas (8/12)
Here's Khloe Kardashian displaying the rare non-spandex cameltoe on Monday while out for lunch. Now that craigslist ad I saw last week is starting to make sense:
HELP WANTED (Calabasas - $10/hr)
Now Hiring: Personal assistant with experience in helping larger women button up pants. *Preference will be given to men who've placed 3rd or higher in World's Strongest Man competition.
*Must be able to exert strenuous effort for multiple hours.
*Unconventional workplace that may include cussing, frustration, failure, and probable exploitation for money if Kris Jenner stops by for a visit.
*15 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian is skinny now?
Flynet says that's Khloe Kardashian "showing off her stunning new figure" while leaving NBC Studios in New York yesterday. I never thought I'd say this, but . . . Khloe Kardashian is sorta hot. *immediately punches self in nuts and washes eyes out with bleach*
*25 Khloe Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:
Khloe Kardashian had a wardrobe malfunction
Khloe Kardashian had a little wardrobe malfunction on Saturday, exposing her Spanx while leaving the Four Seasons Hotel in Westlake Village. For those of you unfamiliar with the concept of Spanx, they're basically modern versions of the old-school girdle, making today's woman on the go seem slimmer than she actually as. That's right. Khloe Kardashian is actually bigger than she appears to be in pictures. I . . . I . . . I think I need a rape shower.
*20 Khloe Kardashian Spanx pictures total in the gallery:
Kim Kardashian leaving an office building in Beverly Hills (3/22)
C'mon, did you really think you could separate these two forever? Of course the Kardashians were eventually gonna start selling their own line of fake tan. Snooki and JWoww are gonna be so excited! Kim told Women's Wear Daily:
"I think tanning has really been a way of life for all of us, living in California," Kim said. "Especially, more recently, the need for sunless tan. When I travel, the one thing that makes me feel alive whether or not I have makeup on is a tan, especially in my face. When you travel, you can't just go lay out. I do like regular tanning because I have psoriasis, and the tanning beds are particularly good for that. Every time I put sunless tan before, it wouldn't be even -- so we wanted a system that was really easy but yet is a full system."You know what? I'm all in on this one. I've seen the Kardashians without makeup, so I can tell you in all honesty that these animals know all about blotchy, uneven skin. They need all the help they can get. Another thing the Kardashians know all about is the proper fluid squirting dynamics so crucial to a quality bottle of fake tan -- look for their new line to be dispensed from a giant black bottle that won't call you tomorrow.
"[We] came up with something that is still good for your skin and healthy for you; everything is paraben- and sulfate-free," Kourtney said. "We love beauty and fashion, but making sure we're taking care of our bodies is crucial to us."
*21 Kim Kardashian pictures total in the gallery: