Kelly Osbourne stumbling home last night after partying at the Mahiki Club in London
"No seriously wall, no seriously, you're like the best wall I've ever known, no seriously, I'm not even kiddi -- I loooooove you."
[INFDaily.com, Pacific Coast News, WENN]
Kelly Osbourne has finally figured it out. When you lack any modicum of talent, just push out your tits and people will pay attention to you (shown her at a taping of TRL UK). It worked for John Travolta so why wouldn't it work for her?
Kelly Osbourne admitted Sunday night at an HIV benefit concert in London that a member of her family is HIV positive. According to witnesses present at the show, the 22-year-old Osbourne began sobbing right before leaving the stage. Thought Kelly didn't say who the HIV positive family member was it has to be Ozzy, right? He's had more used needles in him arm than a dumpster outside a Mexican free clinic. I'm pretty sure you'd catch something just by talking to Ozzy on the phone. If he could even operate it. "Sharon! The fucking television remote won't stop ringing!"
(Source)
Kelly Osbourne is claiming that her mom and she were thrown off a nude beach in Spain because they wouldn't take their tops off. According to Kelly, who's probably lying about this entire thing, the incident occurred on an idyllic stretch of sand on the island of Mallorca:
"I went to Mallorca with my mum and we were on a beach and asked to move because we wouldn't go topless. It was my worst holiday."
Whew! Nothing ruins a weekend better than Kelly Osbourne topless candids floating around the internet. Remember when those pictures of Star Jones in a bikini came out last year. Accidentally saw 'em...couldn't leave my room for a damn week. My mom had to confiscate my lighter because I was trying to set fire to my crotch. You thought this country suffered after 9/11? Imagine photos of the white version of Star Jones showing her nipples splashed across our computer screens.
Kelly Osbourne
y only explanation for this photo of Kelly Osbourne and another guy is that he's actually her cousin. Or her assistant. Or a paid actor. Or a bum they gave a carton of cigarettes to. Or he's actually photoshopped in (throw me a bone here people; assuming that no male penis is within 20 yards of Kelly Osbourne when she goes to bed is what gets me through the night---that and copious amounts of percocet *weeps softly*).
[WENN]
