Recently in Kelly Osbourne Category

Kelly Osbourne Halloween Costume

Kelly Osbourne at Heidi Klum and Seal's annual Halloween Party in West Hollywood (10/31)

Kelly Osbourne at Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian's wedding in Bel Air (9/27)

Kelly Osbourne. Might. Do. Playboy. RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! From OK! magazine:

Rumours are circulating that Kelly Osbourne could pose for Playboy.

The 24-year-old star, who is currently dancing up a storm on Dancing With The Stars, the US version of Strictly, is believed to be on playboy chief Hugh Hefner’s wish list, along with Transformers actress Megan Fox.

According to the 83-year-old’s twin girlfriends Kristina and Karissa Shannon, Kelly is looking better than ever and would look great in the buff.

They told entertainment site E! Online: "She's losing weight and she's blond now…She looks good. I want to see what she looks like naked."

Megan Fox posing for Playboy = awesome. Kelly Osbourne = nausea. If you really want to see an overweight and disgustingly unattractive person, you don't buy a Playboy -- you buy a ticket to see Capitalism: A Love Story. The bottom line is that at 83, either Heff's finally starting to lose his touch, or he sees something hidden in Kelly that somehow makes her an extremely attractive woman . . . e.g. she keeps her mouth shut during Monday Night Football.

Kelly Osbourne blasts Lady Gaga

Little known fact about Kelly Osbourne: she doesn't own a mirror . . . right? That's the only way this next story makes any sense whatsoever -- ya know, if she's never actually seen what she looks like. From Contact Music:

Outspoken rock spawn Kelly Osbourne has launched a vicious attack on Lady Gaga, insisting the pop sensation "has everything" but an attractive face.

She rants, "She's a Butter Face - she has everything 'but her face' (is unattractive). She reminds me of Peaches Geldof."

And the 24 year old is urging the singer to focus on her music rather than airing her views in the media: "I love Lady GaGa's tracks but I just wish she'd keep her mouth shut. She talks way too much and has too much attitude. It's starting to make me go off her."

It's ironic that Kelly would call out Lady Gaga as a butterface when she's got the body of a butterball. Kelly Osbourne insulting someone about their looks is like Audrina Patridge calling someone stupid or Michael Moore calling someone fat -- it's the pot/kettle syndrome. If Kelly really wants to pick on somebody truly repulsive, she should start with an easier target, like Sarah Jessica Parker or Northern Florida.

Kelly Osbourne completely shitfaced last May in London

Kelly Osbourne checked into Oregon's Hazelden Alcohol and Drug rehabilitation center on Wednesday -- the third time she's been in rehab in five years. One more stay and the fifth's free! Kelly's mom Sharon told Radar magazine:

"Yeah, Kelly's in rehab. What else can we say? She knew that it was the right thing to do at this point and we're proud that she did it. The family is all standing behind her. Kelly knew that she needed help and she's getting it." (Source)

Do me a favor. If I ever use the word "proud" when talking about my daughter entering rehab for the third time in five years, please castrate me so I can't reproduce anymore.

Kelly Osbourne arrested for assault

Kelly Osbourne was arrested earlier this month for an incident that occurred last summer where she slapped a journalist who insulted her boyfriend. I guess you're not allowed to hit people in England. Bunch of nancies. From People:

The allegations stem from a claim that Osbourne hit gossip columnist Zoe Griffin after Griffin wrote an article mocking Osbourne's model boyfriend Luke Worrall. In a piece last August in the U.K. newspaper The Mirror, Griffin wrote that she was approached in Punk nightclub by Osbourne, who took issue with a story Griffin had written saying Worrall had to ask how an earthquake was caused.

Griffin quoted her saying, "I have an issue with you. My boyfriend knows what an earthquake is and everyone has been laughing at him and he's upset."

As the conversation drew to a close, Griffin wrote, "That's when I felt a hard slap to my right cheekbone." (Source)

Slapping? Kelly should have been arrested for that outfit. I mean, plaid. Are you fucking kidding me? What season is this, Spring 2007? . . . I'm sorry you had to read that. You know, for a 28-year-old straight male who watches way too much sports, I can be such a sassy bitch sometimes

Kelly Osbourne leaving a Rite-Aid in L.A. (11/19)

+ Shitty Aubrey O'Day upskirt picture [Drunken Stepfather]

+ Denise Milani is, ahem, stacked [Hollywood Tuna]

+ Blake Lively has that just effed look [Bastardly]

+ In case you missed it: Karolina Kurkova is a freak [Egotastic!]

+ Tricia Helfer is beautiful sorta [Popoholic]

+ The worst celebrity couple of 2008 is . . . [I'm Not Obsessed]

+ Rihanna has a new dumb tattoo [Dlisted]

+ Adriana Lima is definitely one of the better women to resemble [College Humor]

+ Lara Flynn Boyle might weigh 90 pounds [A Socialite's Life]

+ Selena Gomez is probably talking shit about Taylor Swift [Lossip]

+ Megan Fox and that douche she's dating are planning their wedding [Yeeeah!]

+ Lenny Kravitz's NYC sex pad [CityRag]

+ It's an all-out war between Brangelina and Jen [popbytes]

+ Cindy McCain's mystery lover revealed as a used-car salesman [Gabby Babble]

My thoughts exactly

Kelly Osbourne had a pregnancy scare when she was just 13-years-old . . . *shudders* . . . in a recent interview, the ambassador for "World Contraception Day" (seriously) told New! magazine:

"I convinced myself I was pregnant when I was 13 and I hadn't even got my period. There are so many rumors and also so much wrong information being passed around, so it is a really important message the World Contraception Day is trying to give out . . . I am not the kind of person who talks about my sex life, but I am not afraid to talk about contraception. I go three, maybe four times a year to get tested for sexually transmitted infections and most of the time I don't even need to. I just go for peace of mind." (Source)

Is anyone surprised the daughter of Ozzy Osbourne lost her virginity before she hit high school? I think it's probably safe to assume that Ozzy's parenting skills are about on par with his public speaking ones. And considering how many times a year Kelly has to get tested for sexually transmitted diseases, instead of "World Contraception Day," wouldn't she be better suited to promote "World Abstinence Day"?

[WENN]

Kelly Osbourne and Luke Worrell at the V Festival in Chelmsford, UK (8/16)

Kelly Osbourne has a new boyfriend. And he actually makes out with her. In public. Sober. From the New York Post:

Kelly Osbourne has finally gotten lucky. After living in London for months, Ozzy's youngest daughter hit Stateside for Fashion Week with model Luke Worrell. "She's going to all the shows, hanging out backstage and making out with him everywhere," said our spy. (Source)

PDA between two hot female Swedish runway models is one thing. Between two disgusting black-eyeshadow-loving-freaks is something entirely different. I'd imagine watching Kelly Osbourne make out with a dude is only slightly less nauseating than falling face first into a Port-O-Potty. I'd tell her to "get a room," but she probably couldn't fit through the door. In other words Kelly . . . give me a call. Let's do lunch.

She looks like a bass

Washed-up rocker Axl Rose badly wants to bang Kelly Osbourne -- and he's not ashamed to let her know it. From OK! magazine:

Hipster New York designer Richie Rich told OK! that he and his buddy Kelly, 24, bumped into the oddball singer at a recent Hollywood party.

"He was really weird with her," said the Heatherette fashionista at a party for the launch of the new Tide and Downy Total Care washing liquid. "He kept leering at her and saying, "I want to fuck you!" (Source)

Give Axl some credit. When you've sold millions of albums, made truckloads of money, and become an international icon, you've earned the right to bang 20-something-year-olds. You've just got to wonder why someone who could be eating filet mignon would settle for Spam. The sad thing about this story is that that pick up line probably works for Axl most of the time. With Kelly though, you've got to be a little more subtle, something like, "I've got three pounds of fudge back at my place" or "Can I buy you a feedbag?" would probably work a little better. Judging by that black eye she was sporting yesterday, Kelly must have told Axl no.

[WENN]

Kelly Osbourne leaving her London home (8/26)

I know many of you think it's shocking what I did to Kelly Osbourne yesterday but in all fairness, I did tell that bitch I wanted the last dinner roll.