Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale can wear the hell out of spandex

In an interview in the new issue of Women's Health, Kate Beckinsale reveals that someone grabbed her boobs recently at a concert in Toronto. Oh, did I say someone? I meant to say THE LUCKIEST GUY IN THE WORLD. Via the Daily Mail:

She's currently in cinemas starring in her fourth Underworld adventure as feisty vampire warrioress Selene. But there's no doubt that Kate Beckinsale herself has a far softer side than her leather-clad alter-ego. The 38-year-old opened up to Women's Health magazine about her forthcoming role in her director husband Les Wiseman's film Total Recall.

She said of co-star Mark Wahlberg: "He’s very manly. And if someone squeezes your boobs at a Katy Perry concert - which is what happened to me in Toronto - I did wish Mark was there because he would have sorted it out."

So, Marky Mark has you fooled too, Kate? Don't let his macho act put you in a bad spot. Had Marky seen your boobs grabbed, he would have done what all Hollywood posers would have done: called for security (i.e. real men) to handle the problem then masturbate later on to the depravity of the moment. Had it been yours truly, I would have put the perp in a rear naked choke until security took his limp body away, laid a smooch right on those kissable lips of yours, and then painted you a beautiful watercolor of the surrounding landscape. Why? Because I'm what my Uncle Chuck Norris calls "one bad ass motherfucker."

*12 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale at a photocall for Underworld: Awakening at the Villamagna Hotel in Madrid, Spain (1/25)

*28 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Beckinsale and her husband Len Wiseman in L.A. (1/17)

Not only is Kate Beckinsale beyond gorgeous, but she also has a pretty awesome sense of humor. Like the time she stuffed a dildo into her mom's carry-on bag at the airport. Via Contact Music:

Kate Beckinsale once forced her mother to "dump" a large rubber penis at a Montreal, Canada airport after a saucy prank went awry. Beckinsale explains:

"We'd sort of had a little bit of an argument and she was leaving... and my make-up artist had given me... for Easter - I don't know why - this enormous penis... a rubber one... it was quite wobbly... It was definitely decorative... It wasn't functional. I kept on stashing it in my trailer... and I thought, 'I'm just gonna put it in her hand luggage when she goes to the airport and maybe that'll somehow cheer us up,' so I did that.

"I was gonna let it get to that point but my make-up artist was so horrified that I'd done it... I had to call her up and say, 'Look, I'm really sorry, but just look in your bag.' She went, 'Oh my God, Kate, I can't believe you've done it.... What am I going to do with it?' I think she had to somehow... dump it at the airport... She said she dumped it."

Kate Beckinsale's sense of humor is as ruthless as her beauty is breathtaking. She had to be talked into not humiliating her mother. HER OWN MOTHER. How many women do you know that would do that? Hell, how many women do you know -- Kim Kardashian doesn't count -- that wouldn't shriek at the sight of a big black dildo? None I can think of, and that's why I must violently stalk Kate Beckinsale. Hey, you brought this upon yourself, Kate.

*22 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale leaving her home in L.A. (1/19)

*10 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Monday, January 16

Kate Beckinsale filming an interview with Extra at The Grove in Hollywood (pics start here)

Rachel Bilson at the 2012 Art of Elysium Heaven Gala at Union Station in L.A. (pics start here)

Khloe Kardashian arriving on a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Victoria Justice at the Warner Bros Golden Globes afterparty in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Mena Suvari leaving the Oaks Gourmet Market in Hollywood (pics start here)

Kristin Davis out and about in Santa Monica (pics start here)

Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem out for a walk in London (pics start here)

Cindy Crawford arriving on a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Malin Akerman shopping at the Melrose Trading Post flea market in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Kate Moss leaving Umu restaurant in London (pics start here)

Sammy Hagar participating in a charity walk in Oahu, Hawaii (pics start here)

Ashley Greene filming Pan Am in New York (pics start here)

Olivia Wilde out and about in Manhattan (pics start here)

*116 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale outside the Ed Sullivan Theater in New York before her appearance on the Late Show with David Letterman (1/10)

*31 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Wednesday, January 4

Kate Beckinsale in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico (pics start here)

Rose McGowan out and about in L.A. (pics start here)

Shauna Sand leaving a hair salon in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Mandy Moore leaving a hair salon in L.A. (pics start here)

Vanessa Hudgens shopping in L.A. (pics start here)

Jason Statham and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley arriving at LAX airport (pics start here)

Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber arriving at The Staples Center for the Lakers vs. Rockets game (pics start here)

Halle Berry picking her daughter Nahla up from school in L.A. (pics start here)

Brooke Burke leaving Live! with Kelly show studios in New York (pics start here)

LL Cool J and Chris O'Donnell filming NCIS: Los Angeles in Santa Monica (pics start here)

Mischa Barton arriving to St. Barts on a helicopter (pics start here)

Ashley Tisdale at a gas station in Toluca Lake (pics start here)

Ellen Pompeo leaving a gym in L.A. (pics start here)

Sarah Shahi filming Fairly Legal in Vancouver (pics start here)

*112 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale arriving for a flight at LAX airport (12/28)

*17 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Beckinsale in the January issue of Redbook

+ Denise Milani has an amazing rack [Hollywood Tuna]

+ Teen Mom bikini tits [The Superficial]
+ Sylvester Stallone is ripped [Celebuzz]
+ I love model boobs (NSFW) [Drunken Stepfather]
+ Fatty! [Popoholic]

+ Elisandra Tomacheski has got serious bikini modeling skills [Guyism]
+ Katy Perry's bikini top works overtime [Pick Me Up News]
+ Everyone wants to bang Tim Tebow [Busted Coverage]
+ Reese Witherspoon is a huge failure [Socialite Life]

+ Shut. The fuck. Up. [Dlisted]
+ This chick is gorgeous [Double Viking]
+ You got knocked the fuck out! [Brobible]
+ LeAnn Rimes broke her ass [Evil Beet]

*6 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale leaving Fred Segal in Santa Monica (12/7)

*11 Kate Beckinsale pictures total in the gallery: