Karissa Shannon

Karissa Shannon bikini pics! (5/30)

Here's some pictures of Hugh Hefner's ex-concubine Karissa Shannon at the beach that I never got around to using for the site. I was gonna post them on Tuesday, but I was just too lazy, so I never got around to it. I was gonna post them yesterday, but it just wasn't worth the extra effort, so I didn't use the pics for a story. I guess you could say I'm treating this post the same way Karissa treats condoms.

*20 Karissa Shannon bikini pictures total in the gallery:

Karissa and Kristina Shannon in Cancun (3/11)

Karissa and Kristina Shannon went to Cancun over the weekend for Spring Break, and in between pulling down her bikini bottoms and flashing her ass, Karissa sobered up enough to tweet some truly touching words to those affected by the tragedy in Japan:

 

As a show of support, Karissa then put on her sluttiest Japanese schoolgirl outfit (the one with no panties) and did a sake body shot off some drunk slut she met at the club that night. So touching. In effect, we are all Japanese during this trying time.

*12 Karissa and Kristina Shannon pictures total in the gallery:

Karissa Shannon bikini pics

Professional skank Karissa Shannon -- currently ranked #1 in the country -- went to the beach in Malibu yesterday, and wouldn't you know it, the paparazzi just wouldn't leave her alone. Geesh, can't a woman pose seductively on a beach anymore without everyone bugging her?

*10 Karissa Shannon bikini pictures total in the gallery:

Kristina Shannon and a friend at the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas (10/2)

Hugh Hefner's ex girlfriends, Karissa and Kristina Shannon, celebrated their 21st birthday on Saturday at the Hard Rock in Las Vegas pretty much exactly like everyone thought they would -- by acting like total drunken whores. I'm not going to ruin what's behind the yellow star if you click it, but I will say this: it's very very doubtful that Kristina is sponsored by any underwear companies.

NOTE: To see the uncensored Kristina Shannon upskirt picture, click the picture above or any thumbnail with a yellow star on it and then click the "Full Size" button located at the top or bottom of the image.

*26 Kristina and Karissa Shannon birthday pictures total in the gallery:

Karissa Shannon's sex tape most extreme ever

According to the head of Vivid, Karissa Shannon's sex tape may be the "most extreme" celebrity sex tape to ever hit the market. So it's got that going for it. Which is nice. From TMZ:

Vivid Entertainment has their hands on the Karissa tape she made with boyfriend Sam Jones III.  When we caught up with Vivid honcho Steven Hirsch outside STK last night, he told us the Karissa tape was "definitely the most extreme video that I've ever seen, as a celebrity tape. There's everything you can imagine -- whips, chains, handcuffs. It's absolutely crazy."

But don't get too excited -- Jones has previously told us he and Karissa plan on having their lawyers but a block on the tape.

I love that last line about the lawyer. Bitch, you spread your legs for 84-year-old Hugh Hefner. Don't act like you're suddenly the Queen of England. What, were you too busy having afternoon tea to give TMZ a quote on this? Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if Karissa gave out this tape as a Christmas gift this year. "The first 5 minutes is just dialogue, so you should probably fast-forward past that."

NOTE: To see the uncensored Karissa (l) and Kristina Shannon (r) nude pictures, click the picture above or any thumbnail with a yellow star on it and then click the "Full Size" button located at the top or bottom of the image.

*5 Karissa Shannon pictures total in the gallery:

Karissa Shannon in Las Vegas (8/21)

Late last Friday, it was learned that Spencer Pratt was threatening to release a sex tape featuring himself and his "estranged" wife, Heidi Montag 2.0. Since I hate Heidi and Spencer almost as much as lima beans, I really tried to stay away from the story as long as possible -- and I did, for a whole 3 days. But then Heidi had to go and force my hand by getting it on with another chick (the chick in question being Hugh Hefner's ex-girlfriend, Karissa Shannon, pictured above). You scheming son-of-a-bitch! From TMZ:

Spencer Pratt has unearthed a girl-on-girl tape featuring Heidi Montag and Playboy Playmate Karissa Shannon .... sources tell TMZ. We're told not too long ago Spencer was at the Malibu house he once shared with Heidi ... moving out some of his stuff.  Sources tell us Spencer came upon a camera with XXX video of Heidi and Karissa -- and the light bulb went off.

Sources say it was then that Spencer decided he could make a fortune selling his "library" to Vivid Entertainment -- much of it featuring naked, fornicating Speidi. We could not reach Heidi and her reps were mum.

As for Karissa Shannon -- she tells us such a tape does indeed exist, but she's not convinced Spencer really has it. Karissa says if the tape ever sees the light of day, she'll sue the pants off him.

Wow, a lesbian sex tape featuring an ex Playboy Playmate and Heidi Montag's EEE tits? Heidi and Spencer are going to be rich! Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if they made $8.1 million on this tape -- or roughly the same amount of money Jennifer Aniston's new movie The Switch debuted at this weekend. Ha Ha Ha, you suck Aniston! Just quit already.

*15 Karissa Shannon pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Friday, July 2

Former Playmate Karissa Shannon at Malibu Beach (pics start here)

Robert Pattinson on the set of Water For Elephants in L.A. (pics start here)

Victoria Silvstedt on a yacht off of Menton, France (pics start here)

Reese Witherspoon on the set of Water For Elephants  L.A. (pics start here)

Matthew McConaughey out and about in Malibu (pics start here)

Actress Isabel Lucas arriving to LAX airport (pics start here)

David Beckham and his son Brooklyn at Heathrow airport (pics start here)

Jamie Lee Curtis walking her dogs in Santa Monica (pics start here)

Halle Berry leaving Bristol Farms market in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Hilary Duff and Haylie Duff at a party for the play Love, Loss, and What I Wore in New York (pics start here)

Bruce Willis out and about in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Singer Myleene Klass at the O2 Silver Clef Awards in London (pics start here)

Ben Stiller leaving the Claridges hotel in London (pics start here)

*116 pictures total in the gallery:

Karissa and Kristina Shannon leaving a medical marijuana store in L.A. (1/27)

I'm worried about Hugh Hefner's new girlfriends. I think they may have glaucoma. Or possibly severe arthritis. How else do you explain them leaving a medical marijuana store yesterday in L.A.? There's no other possible reason. Poor things. They're so young, too. They'll certainly be in my thoughts.

Karissa and Kristina Shannon, Hugh Hefner, and Crystal Harris

I guess Hugh Hefner's getting bored with the twins. The Playboy founder is now dating a third girl, 22-year-old college student Crystal Harris. From the New York Daily News:

"I'm a good girl, for the most part," new Hef gal pal Crystal Harris writes on her MySpace page. (The 34-25-34 San Diego State University psychology student and PETA supporter lists "the rain, the seasons, fast cars, good food, volunteering, great company, caring and honest people, the ocean and animals" among her interests.)

Harris introduced herself on an E! online message board over the holidays, telling fans that "Hef gave me permission to fill people in on the new updates as a voice from the mansion." No other girlfriends are in the mix at this time, she says, but "there are a couple that we have interest in. ... As for now, it is just us three." (Source)

If someone who takes off her clothes for money, sleeps with an octogenarian, and engages in group sex is a "good girl," I'd hate to see a bad one. Other things Crystal might want to start listing as her interests: Changing bed pans, shopping for Fixodent, and dying a little bit more on the inside each day.

CREEPY FACT: If you combine their ages, Hef's three girlfriends still aren't as old as him (82 vs. 60)