Justin Bieber


Justin Bieber leaving a medical building in L.A. (10/13)

Serious question: Why does Justin Bieber walk like a gorilla? Did he never learn how to walk? Was he raised in the Canadian wilderness? I need to know.

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*15 pictures total in the gallery:

  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 1
  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 2
  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 3
  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 4
  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 5
  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 6
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  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 13
  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 14
  • Justin Bieber Gorilla Walk 15

Justin Bieber and Kendall Jenner leaving Ferdi restaurant in Paris (10/1)

Here's Justin Bieber and Kendall Jenner having lunch together in Paris yesterday. Ouch. This has to infuriate Selena Gomez. Not only is her on-again/off-again boyfriend cheating on her, but he's doing it with a reality star. And yes, the stink of reality stardom absolutely trumps being known as a model. It's like if you have AIDS and a cold. Dude, you just have AIDS. Kendall, you're just a reality star.

*30 Justin and Kendall pictures total in the gallery:

  • Bieber Kendall Jenner 1
  • Bieber Kendall Jenner 2
  • Bieber Kendall Jenner 3
  • Bieber Kendall Jenner 4
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  • Bieber Kendall Jenner 1
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  • Bieber Kendall Jenner 15

Justin Bieber and Yovanna Ventura driving in L.A. (7/9)

No shock here, but a source tells the latest issue of OK! magazine that Justin Bieber basically has all of his friends on payroll. Wait, are you trying to tell me they don't hang out with him because of his charming personality?
"Justin is so used to everyone being at his beck and call that he's got a completely distorted view of friendship," says the source. "He thinks that by showering folks with gifts or flying them around on his private jet, he's buying their discretion, but many of them have no qualms about selling stories about him."

One of his biggest beneficiaries is Lil Za, who took the heat when drugs were found at Justin's house. "Justin gave Za two cars and a hundred grand after that whole debacle," says the source. The flock of girls who surround Justin don't come cheap either. "He loves getting girls to give him and his pals lap dances at his parties, so he throws wads of cash at them to do it," adds the source. "He thinks all his spending impresses people, but he doesn't realize that they're just using him."
Justin's going to have to learn the hard way one of life's most valuable lessons: as particles approach the speed of light, their relative mass increases exponentially buying the affection of others only leads to herpes hardship, herpes disappointment, and herpes pain. He'll also learn that blondes usually command a 32% premium over brunettes. Now, I'm not saying that's right, I'm just saying that's the free market. Thanks Milton Friedman!

*15 Justin Bieber pictures total in the gallery:

  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 1
  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 2
  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 3
  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 4
  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 5
  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 6
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  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 11
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  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 13
  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 14
  • Justin Bieber Paid Friends 15

Paparazzi photos from Tuesday, September 2

Selena Gomez (and Justin Bieber) at his dad's house in Stratford, Ontario (pics start here)

Hilary Duff shopping in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Jamie Chung shopping in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Mandy Moore leaving Carousel Restaurant in Hollywood (pics start here)

Alessandra Ambrosio leaving the Brentwood Country Mart (pics start here)

Padma Lakshmi out and about in New York (pics start here)

Lisa Rinna leaving a yoga class in Studio City (pics start here)

Amanda Peet leaving Bristol Farms in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Irina Shayk catching a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Shia LaBeouf and his girlfriend Mia Goth out for lunch at Lemonade in Studio City (pics start here)

Kendall Jenner out and about in New York (pics start here)

Ashley Tisdale returning home in Toluca Lake (pics start here)

*104 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 1
  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 2
  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 3
  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 4
  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 5
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  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 15
  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 1
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  • Selena Gomez Canada Bikini 1
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Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez driving to her home in Calabasas (8/17)

Stop me if you've heard this story before: Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez are messing around again. Justin's been banging his way through the model directory, but apparently that doesn't matter to Selena, because she spent the night at his house on Saturday. That's the two of them rolling around in his Ford Focus on Saturday -- oh no, that's right, he drives a Lamborghini. And owns like ten others. He's basically the Sultan of Brunei of boy banders. Don't think for a second, Justin, Selena won't drop you in a second when you lose your fortune. Somehow I don't think she's with you for your charming personality. "Let's get high on sizzurp and then I'll stick it in your butt, eh?"

*14 Justin and Selena pictures total in the gallery:

  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 1
  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 2
  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 3
  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 4
  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 5
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  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 11
  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 12
  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 13
  • Selena Justin Bieber Lovers Weekend 14

Alyssa Arce in Ibiza (8/2)

Seriously, fuck this little asshole. Playboy's Miss July 2013 Alyssa Arce was spotted making out with Justin Bieber on a yacht earlier this week in Ibiza. What makes this especially painful is that Alyssa's measurements are 32D-24-34. Justin is basically banging a chick normally only seen in a comic book. Here. Take my dog. Kick it.

BONUS: Alyssa Arce naked here, here, here, here, here, here, and here

*20 Alyssa Arce pictures total in the gallery:

  • Justin Bieber Alyssa Arce 1
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  • Justin Bieber Alyssa Arce 20

Orlando Bloom in Malibu (6/28)

Orlando Bloom: American hero. And I don't care if he's British. He's a godddamn American hero in my book. The actor threw a punch at Justin Bieber late last night at a restaurant in Ibiza. You haven't heard anything about Justin being dead so obviously the punch didn't connect. From TMZ:
We're getting different versions of what incited Orlando, and people are taking sides. One account is Justin extended his hand to Orlando, who refused it, and when Justin asked what's your problem ... Orlando mentioned Miranda. Justin then tried to walk away and that's when Orlando swung.

A second version -- Justin said something to the effect of, I had sex with your wife ... and THEN Orlando swung . . . Orlando was in Cipriani restaurant which was packed with celebs, including Paris Hilton, and Diddy.
Looks like we can confirm those rumors that Bieber slept with Miranda Kerr. But Orlando fucked Selena Gomez, so everything should be even. The big loser in this whole thing is clearly Paris Hilton. What if everyone knew you existed, but no one cared?

*20 Orlando Bloom pictures total in the gallery:

  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 1
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 2
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 3
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 4
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 5
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 6
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 7
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  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 11
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 12
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 13
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 14
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 15
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 1
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 2
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 3
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 4
  • Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Fight 5

Justin Bieber leaving his apartment in Beverly Hills (7/23)

Signs of general badassery? Check (tattoos). Crotch grab? Check. Wispy mustache struggling to break free from the grip of puberty? Check.  Ladies, if you haven't cum yet, you're not alive.

*15 Justin Bieber pictures total in the gallery:

  • Justin Bieber Small Penis Grab 1
  • Justin Bieber Small Penis Grab 2
  • Justin Bieber Small Penis Grab 3
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  • Justin Bieber Small Penis Grab 15

Justin Bieber at The Commons in Calabasas (6/24)

Justin Bieber doesn't care about red zones. Fuck your red zones. An outlaw like Justin Bieber will park where he wants to. There's a fire? Fuck your fire. There's a medical emergency? Fuck your medical emergency. There's a tow truck? Fuck your tow tr--wait a minute.

*5 Justin Bieber pictures total in the gallery:

  • Justin Bieber Red Zone 1
  • Justin Bieber Red Zone 2
  • Justin Bieber Red Zone 3
  • Justin Bieber Red Zone 4
  • Justin Bieber Red Zone 5

Party at Selena's house!

Police were called to Selena Gomez's house last night because of a raging party. Oh thank god they responded so quickly. We're all safe now. From TMZ:
Law enforcement sources tell TMZ Selena's Hidden Hills, CA neighbors were so pissed off at the loud noise coming from her house at around 11:30 PM ... they called police. The cops responded and warned Selena and company to turn down the volume or else. One neighbor tells TMZ the noise was so ear-crushing her windows were rattling.

Sources connected with Selena and her family tell us he singer has told her kinfolk she's back with Justin Bieber because he's cleaned up his act. But they tell us they don't think it's coincidental at all that in the last few days she's spent a late, late night at a Hollywood club with Bieber and had an out-of-control party on a Tuesday night.
This is clearly Justin Bieber's fault. Before she met Justin, Selena's Tuesday nights were spent drinking milk, knitting poodle skirts, and listening to light Christian rock. Now that milk has been replaced by alcohol and she's listening to modern pop music laced with expletives. America's sweetheart has turned into a . . . wait for it . . . normal 21-year-old woman. EVERYBODY PANIC!

*15 Selena Gomez pictures total in the gallery:

  • Selena Gomez House Party 1
  • Selena Gomez House Party 2
  • Selena Gomez House Party 3
  • Selena Gomez House Party 4
  • Selena Gomez House Party 5
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  • Selena Gomez House Party 11
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  • Selena Gomez House Party 13
  • Selena Gomez House Party 14
  • Selena Gomez House Party 15

Would You Rather?

Would You Rather...? Spend one night with: