Jon Voight

Angelina Jolie and Jon Voight reconcile

In August 2002, in an interview with Access Hollywood, Jon Voight pleaded for his daughter Angelina Jolie to get help for her "serious mental problems." He later told People: "I'm a desperate father. I'm trying to reach her. I just pray to God she hears me." Not surprisingly, Angelina was pretty pissed at Jon and the two didn't talk for years. Not helping matters was the fact that Jon didn't even know the names of Angelina's kids:

Voight (on the red carpet for the 4th Annual BAFTA Tea Party in England): Maddox just had a birthday. Happy birthday, Maddox! 5 years old—it's a big one! You're getting to be a young man, and I send my love to you. And send my love to...uh...Shakira...and...Shahira... [To reporter] Is it Shakira or Shahira?
Reporter: Zahara.
Voight: Shahara! Shahara!

Well I guess everything's cool now between Angelina and Jon because there's the two of them (and Brad Pitt and Za-something) in Venice yesterday. Jon is so screwed. Has he been following the news? Does he realize how many new grandchildren he gained since the last time Angelina and him talked? He's gonna need a home equity loan to buy everyone birthday and Christmas presents. If I was him, I'd go on Access Hollywood again -- like, tomorrow -- and call Angelina a filthy cunt or something.

Angelina Jolie at the Golden Globe Awards in L.A. (1/11)

Did you know that Angelina Jolie is a total freaking bitch? It's true. Jon Voight's defeated expression told me. From the National Enquirer:

Angelina Jolie gave dad Jon Voight the cold shoulder at the Golden Globes after-party at the Beverly Hilton's Circa 55 restaurant on Jan. 11. When Jon approached Angie's table, she ignored him and continued to chat with a girlfriend. Jon waited patiently for nearly 20 minutes, but finally gave up and moved on. (Print Edition - 1/26)

When ranking her all-time proudest accomplishments, do you think Angelina Jolie would put "ripped the heart out of a poor old man" above or below "swallowed more seamen than Moby Dick"? I think it could go either way.

NOTE: If John ever wants to become the center of attention for Angelina again, there's only one thing he can do: marry Brad Pitt.