Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez leaving Duck Soup bookstore in L.A. (11/28)

+ Hot girl photoshop FAIL [College Humor]

+ Brooke Burke needs to get out more [Drunken Stepfather]
+ Penelope Cruz > Kate Hudson [Just Jared]
+ Rachel Stevens upskirt [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ One of Tiger's whores in a bikini [The Blemish]
+ Enter to win a bundle of World Series of Beer Pong gear, including a table! Entry form is online at: [Saturday Night Magazine]

+ Holy crap Candice Swanepoel is hot [Holy Taco]
+ Who's the dude in the middle? [A Socialite's Life]
+ Evan Rachel Wood is freaking insane [Yeeeah!]
+ Roman Polanski back at his Swiss chalet, free to rape children [Cele|bitchy]
+ Katherine Heigl is good people [I'm Not Obsessed] 

LIST OF THE DAY: 20 Naughty Anime Figures

Jennifer Lopez leaving a medical building in Beverly Hills (11/25)

+ Mila Kunis can be really hot when she wants to [Hollywood Tuna]

+ Joanna Krupa's nude PETA ad worked [The Superficial]
+ The unsexiest stars in Hollywood [Wonderwall]
+ The Kardashian sisters photoshop their own bikini pics [Drunken Stepfather]
+ You know this J.Lo sex tape will be released eventually [OK! Magazine]

+ Wrecking ball hits car, but no one dies :( [College Humor]
+ Lindsay Lohan looks . . . hot? [Popoholic]
+ Diane Kruger in a bikini is OHMYGODHOT [IDLYITW]
+ A little something for the ladies [A Socialite's Life]

+ Tiger Woods will not face criminal charges [Dlisted]
+ A nerdy slut [Double Viking]
+ Here's one of the chicks Tiger supposedly nailed [Busted Coverage]
+ Pete Doherty plays nazi anthem at concert in Germany [Attuworld]

J.Lo fell

J.Lo ate shit on stage last night during her performance for the American Music Awards. The on-stage stunt called for J.Lo (she has two kids by the way) to climb up the backs of her dancers, jump off the last one onto the stage, and then dance the night away. FAIL (video of PAGE 2). I don't know who the director of J.Lo's performance was but I would like to be his friend. Because clearly he has an active sense of humor. What did he think would happen asking that fatty to jump three feet into the air? He might as well have told her to dunk over LeBron James.

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony at the Miami Dolphins vs New Orleans Saints game at Land Shark Stadium in Miami (10/25)

I'm always surprised when I see Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony out in public together. You'd think she would keep him locked away in a cage at home so no other woman could steal him away. Or at least give him a stick to defend himself in case he's attacked by an unruly mob of supermodels.

Jennifer Lopez at her 40th birthday party at Edison Ballroom in New York (7/25)

It's J.Lo's party and she'll be a bitch if she wants to . . . even if you're famous enough to only go by one name. From the Chicago Sun Times:

These days it's not unusual for invitations to stars' parties to include ''No Cell Phone/No Cameras'' instructions -- which usually aren't observed or enforced when it comes to superstar guests. That wasn't true for the two bashes Marc Anthony threw for wife Jennifer Lopez's 40th birthday last weekend in New York.

''It was particularly funny at the [big Saturday night] party at the Edison Ballroom,'' said a spy who was there. ''People like Gayle King, Beyonce, Rihanna or Madonna aren't used to having their cell phones or Blackberrys confiscated at the door. People really looked [ticked] off ... but they got over it pretty quickly.''

The reason for the rule? Anthony and Lopez have sold exclusive rights to the parties to a celebrity magazine.

For the right price, it sounds like J.Lo will sell the picture rights to anything she does. If she's ever strapped for cash, I wouldn't be surprised if she put some of her most humiliating moments up for sale -- like taking a dump, peeing in the shower, or having sex with Marc Anthony. The sad thing about this story is that she'll probably never allow cameras to the one event we're all actually interested in seeing: her divorce proceedings.

Jennifer Lopez filming The Backup Plan in New York (7/20)

I have some shocking news about J.Lo: She's the mean-spirited mom you'd pretty much expect her to be if you know anything about her whatsoever. Her kids are on a strict no-fun diet. From the New York Daily News:

Jennifer Lopez must have a strict no-helium policy. When word spread through Tribeca that J.Lo had brought her twins to the set of "The Backup Plan," the nabe's kid-friendly Balloon Saloon sent the tots two bunches. J.Lo's bodyguard sternly refused them.

Perhaps J.Lo sent back the balloons because her kids are frightened by them -- you'd be scared of large round orbs too if your mom's ass weighed twice as much as your father. By the way ladies, for those of you that have always wanted to have an enormous ass like J.Lo's, there's only one thing you need to do to make your dreams become a reality: get married.

Jennifer Lopez on the set of The Backup Plan in Pasadena (6/15)

J.Lo's "Sweetface" clothing line is being put on "hiatus" which is code for "production is ending because shit ain't selling." FAIL. From Us Weekly:

...the line will halt production with the spring 2009 collection, which is currently in stores. Still, Lopez -- who still has her flagship line, JLO by Jennifer Lopez -- plans to resurrect the brand at some point in the future.

"In light of new company strategies, we have decided to put the Sweetface line on hiatus while we prepare to reintroduce the brand in the near future with new messaging points and an entirely new fashion point of view," the company said in a statement.

Of course J.Lo's clothing line tanked -- there isn't much demand these days for pants that double as a parachute (with apologies to MC Hammer and his creditors). If J.Lo really wants to make some money, she should get into a field where she has some expertise: pest control (click here to read more stories about Marc Anthony).

Jennifer Lopez arriving at her hotel in New York (4/23)

+ Desmond from Lost being sued for sexual harassment [The Superficial]

+ I think Amy stole that kid [Drunken Stepfather]
+ Abbey Clancy Nipple Slip Pictures [Egotastic!]
+ Top 10 Unintentionally Funny Sports Headlines [Holy Taco]
+ Boobies! (NSFW) [College Humor]

+ Chevy Chase is a pervert [Hollywood Tuna]
+ And the hottest chick at Coachella was . . . [Bastardly]
+ Marisa Miller wearing some foliage [Popoholic]
+ Whitney Port is killing herself [I'm Not Obsessed]

+ Lessons in celebrity plastic surgery [CityRag]
+ Jennifer Hudson is probably not pregnant [A Socialite's Life]
+ Denise Richards talks funbags [Yeeeah!]
+ A baby giraffe just because [popbytes]

Jennifer Lopez at the Golden Globes in Beverly Hills (1/11)

J.Lo was spotted again not wearing her wedding ring, this time at the Golden Globes on Sunday. But she has a perfectly valid excuse why she didn't have the ring on that doesn't have to do with divorce so quit talking about divorce nope definitely not getting a divorce. It clashed with her dress. Lopez told In Touch Weekly:

"Every time I’m not wearing my ring, people think I’m getting divorced. That’s crazy! It just didn’t go with the dress. Divorce is not — and was never — an option."

Hey J.Lo, guess what I'm looking at on my wall right now. Yup, a college degree. And I didn't buy it off the internet. If we forget the fact that I blog for a living, I think that validates that I'm not completely retarded. That's who your comment was aimed at, right? Retarded people? It didn't go with the dress? Have you ever heard a lamer excuse than that? She might has well have said her dog ate it.