Jennifer Lopez

Paparazzi photos from Saturday, April 23 and Sunday, April 24

Jennifer Lopez leaving The Commons at Calabasas (pics start here)

NCIS stars Rocky Carroll, Michael Weatherly, Mark Harmon, Cote de Pablo, and Pauley Perrette are seen filming an interview with Mario Lopez for Extra at The Grove in Hollywood (pics start here)

Ellen Page arriving at The Roxy in Hollywood (pics start here)

Ali Larter leaving Whole Foods in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Playboy model Jayde Nicole at Cassie Scerbo's 21st birthday at the Chateau Nightclub & Gardens inside Paris Las Vegas (pics start here)

Jessica Alba leaving the Shay Todd Swimwear boutique on Melrose Avenue in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Eric Dane shopping in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Olivia Wilde at the "One For All Shorts" program during the 2011 Tribeca Film Festival in New York (pics start here)

Sharon Stone leaving a restaurant in L.A. (pics start here)

Rosario Dawson arriving to the Prince concert at the Forum in L.A. (pics start here)

Emma Roberts out and about in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Hilary Duff and Haylie Duff volunteering at the "Easter for the Homeless" event at the Los Angeles Mission (pics start here)

Leona Lewis leaving The Box Club in London (pics start here)

Mira Sorvino at the premiere of Angels Crest at the 2011 Tribeca Film Festival in New York (pics start here)

*112 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez is the most beautiful woman in the world

Every year around this time, People publishes their "Most Beautiful People" issue, and every year around this time, those of us in the real world give them a collective 'what the fuck'? Like last year when they called that harpy Julia Roberts the most beautiful woman in the world. And this year when they did the same with Jennifer Lopez. People . . . what the fuck? J.Lo, predictably, is handling her new title with grace and modesty:

"The thing is, it's part of my job. I don't want anybody thinking it's easy. It does take time and it's hard work. HDTV wide-screen is nobody's friend!"

Of course this is just retarded. Not only is Jennifer Lopez not the most beautiful woman in the world, but she's probably not even the most beautiful woman in the world named Jennifer Lopez. There were four solicitors that knocked on my door last week trying to sell me crap that I would fuck over her.

Jennifer Lopez is pissed

Apparently Jennifer Lopez is angry that fellow American Idol judge Steven Tyler is stealing all of her thunder. And her cookies. Those are JLo's cookies, dammit! From PopEater:

"This was meant to be Jennifer's big comeback," an insider complains to me. "The entire re-branding of the show was built around her, but now it's all about Steven 24/7."

While Jennifer's the one normally lavished with attention, I'm hearing she's getting annoyed with all the people asking her about the Aerosmith legend.

Snarked my source: "She's mystified at how this happened and has made it very clear to the producers that the cameras need to spend a little more time adoring Jennifer's favorite idol -- herself!"

I really have no sympathy for the producers of this show. They had to figure that JLo was eventually going to start acting like JLo. Just look at her past. This bitch used to get pissed at people for looking her directly in the eye. Dick Clark has a better chance of getting a job as an auctioneer at Sotheby's than JLo does of ever acting like a normal human being.

*20 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

JLo and Ryan Seacrest are fighting

Gee, who could have foreseen that JLo would be anything but a pleasure and joy to work with on the set of American Idol? Oh yeah, that's right, everyone. From the National Enquirer:

Jennifer Lopez and Ryan Seacrest are heading for a bitter showdown over their "American Idol" paychecks, sources tell The Enquirer. Ryan banks $15 million a year, while J.Lo ka-chinged a $12 million package for her first season on the hit show. But the money-savvy diva, 41, has shrewdly negotiated a pay raise for herself every time Ryan, 35, gets a salary boost, and the "Idol" host is livid, insiders say.

"Ryan hasn't confronted J.Lo, but when he heard that her future raises are tied to his raises, he was furious," and insider divulged. "Basically, her contracts are hard wired so that when Ryan makes more money, she'll make more money. He doesn't like his salary being dragged into her contract negotiations, and he's upset about her tactics."

Since J.Lo's salary is linked to his, it may be more difficult for Ryan to get a raise in the future than it would be otherwise. As the Enquirer has reported, Ryan and Jennifer were recently forced to deny widespread reports that they were feuding even before the show began. But their rivalry is very real- and long-standing, said another source connected to the show. "As far as Jenny and her people are concerned, there's no question she is the bigger star," said the source.

JLo's people think "there's no question she is the bigger star" of the two? Then why is she making $3 million less per year? The only thing bigger about JLo is her ass. These two should just settle their disagreement once and for all the way all Hollywood divas do: with a cat fight. Of course, if these two did get into a tussle, you'd have to think that Ryan would be at a distinct disadvantage: JLo would throw haymakers and he'd try to pull her hair.

*25 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez watching her husband Marc Anthony perform at American Airlines Arena in Miami (9/17)

Money and hunger are a dangerous combination . . . especially for J.Lo's ass. From the New York Post:

Jennifer Lopez will not be denied her favorite biscuits. J. Lo wanted to have a 42nd birthday party for her husband, Marc Anthony, at The Lion on West Ninth Street, but the restaurant was booked by Calvin Klein Inc. for a dinner following the firm's runway show.

Lopez ended up throwing the party with Benny Medina at the Bowery Hotel, but she sent her driver to pick up 50 biscuits from The Lion while Katie Holmes, Julianne Moore, Desiree Rogers, Ethan Hawke and Francisco Costa dined inside.

What the hell's so special about these biscuits? They must taste so damn good that J.Lo needs them like Marc Anthony a rat needs cheese. Perhaps what's in the biscuits (trans fat) is the secret behind Jennifer's round and bulbous ass. If that's the case, it might be a good idea for Audrina Patridge to order a lifetime supply's worth (see here).

*10 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey out and about in Malibu (5/29)

Please please please let Mariah Carey become the new judge on American Idol. I want to see Mariah Carey's loopy ass attempt to form coherent sentences on TV every Tuesday and Wednesday night almost as much as I want a car made of solid gold. From the Chicago Sun Times:

Nick Cannon's pitch for "American Idol" to pick his wife, Mariah Carey, as a judge might pick up steam now that it appears Jennifer Lopez is out of the running. People.com cites J.Lo's divalike demands as being a stumbling block to cutting a deal for her to join the show.

Are the producers of American Idol absolute morons? How would having Mariah Carey as a judge be any different than having J.Lo? While they're busy picking egotistical queens who think their shit doesn't stink, why not ask Gwyneth Paltrow, Tyra Banks, or Barney Frank to be judges? If Idol wants to rise to the top once again, they need to get someone in there who doesn't have such high standards -- like anyone willing to date Courtney Love.

*24 pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony shopping in St. Tropez (5/24)

Every so often, a story comes along about a celebrity that makes you think, "Wow, what a horrible horrible human being." Like this story about Jennifer Lopez from the Globe:

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are having major disagreements about adding to their brood. While Marc, 42, is desperate for more kids, 40-year-old J.Lo isn't ready to get pregnant again. And one of the big sticking points is that "Jennifer doesn't want to wreck her new hot body," dishes an insider. "She loves children and always imagined she'd have a big family. But she has no desire to pork up again -- especially as she struggled so badly to lose the 50 pounds she gained last time. She was huge when she was expecting and had to practically kill herself to get back into shape."

But the singer/actress realizes that her baby-making days may be numbered, as she'll be 41 in July. And "she's suggested to Marc that if they do decide to have more children, maybe they should use a surrogate. He's not sure but Jennifer usually gets her own way." (Print Edition - 6/21)

It's nice to know that money and fame have kept Jennifer Lopez so grounded -- it would have been a terrible shame if she'd let her celebrity turn her into some sort of self-absorbed egotistical maniac. Regardless, what is she so scared about anyway? Becoming pregnant is something a woman like J.Lo should be inherently good at -- after all, she is Latina has child-bearing hips. 

*25 pics total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez arriving to the Crillon Hotel in Paris (4/27)

+ Gwyneth Paltrow has some seriously yoked legs [Just Jared]

+ Lindsay Lohan does another half-naked photoshoot [Drunken Stepfather]
+ In celebrity sex tape news . . . [PopEater]
+ Heather Graham looking all kinds of hot [Popoholic]
+ Claire Daines is see through (NSFW) [TaxiDriverMovie]

+ Ha Ha, you suck Sharon Stone! [Cele|bitchy]
+ Erin Lucas looks great in her underwear [Holy Taco]
+ Actually, why don't you just chill out for a while [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]
+ Why is Kate Hudson dressed like a hobo? [I'm Not Obsessed]

LIST OF THE DAY: The 10 Hottest Ginger Actresses

Jennifer Lopez at the Fontainebleau Hotel in Miami (1/22)

J.Lo's neighbor in Hidden Hills, CA thinks she's a stupid bitch farthead. OK maybe he didn't exactly use those words, but it's safe to say he's not a fan. From Radar:

One of JLo’s close neighbors . . . told RadarOnline.com exclusively that living near he actor/singer is, at times, a loud nightmare. The neighbor, who doesn’t want to be identified, described a recent day when the neighborhood tranquility was shattered by room-shaking music and a thunderous drum beat.

Despite the large properties in the neighborhood the sound from JLo’s house shook things up immediately. “It was LOUD,” the neighbor told RadarOnline.com. “It was during the day, about 4 in the afternoon but even as loud as the music was I could hear JLo barking orders over the music!”

The fearless neighbor, not intimidated by stardom, walked over to JLo’s house fully intending to knock on the door and tell the star to keep it down. But the neighbor was intercepted in the driveway by two of Jennifer Lopez’s “handlers.”

Boo-fucking-hoo. You'll have to excuse me if I can't feel sorry about the noise level being too high for a guy that lives in a multimillion dollar mansion in one of the world's most exclusive neighborhoods. Last night I couldn't sleep for more than two seconds without having to listen to my roommate masturbate while the tenant in the apartment next door was apparently clearcutting the rain forest with his chainsaw.

Jennifer Lopez outside CNN Studios in L.A. (1/18)

+ It's Snooki's ass! (semi-NSFW) [The Superficial]

+ Roman Polanski's lawyers fight back [Wonderwall]
+ Shauna Sand in yet another see-through dress [Drunken Stepfather]
+ Wyclef is Haitan for scammer [IDLYITW] 
+ Is there an award this guy hasn't won yet? [OK! Magazine]

+ 20 awesome library books. Sweeeeet [College Humor]
+ And the most photogenic person ever is . . . [Popoholic]
+ Lindsay Lohan spotted making out with some french actor [A Socialite's Life]

+ Seriously, Heidi looks like a damn robot now [Dlisted]
+ Why yes your boobs are quite large [Double Viking]
+ Is this Shaq having cybersex? Certainly looks like it. [Busted Coverage]
+ Moscow highway billboard hacked to show porn [Attuworld]