Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez at a photoshoot in Miami (1/27)

Here's some pics of Jennifer Lopez at a swimsuit photoshoot last Friday that I never got around to posting (*makes drinking motion with pinky and thumb*). And no, I don't know why the hell J.Lo is still doing swimsuit photoshoots. She has two kids, big hips, and no tits. They might as well have hired a guy in a gorilla costume.

*51 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart in Kauai, Hawaii (11/27)

Jennifer Lopez has been dating the 2012 version of K-Fed, Casper Smart, for about a month now. Um, I hope she's been doing all the driving. From the National Enquirer:

According to police records, [Jennifer Lopez's new boyfriend Caper] Smart has been charged with speeding greater than 100 mph and illegal drag racing. He was also charged with driving without a valid license in 2004, 2006 and 2007, and evading electronic toll charges in 2005. To top it off, he's been busted for failure to display front and rear plates, and failure to register a vehicle. Smart has a January court date on charges that he recklessly drag-raced on a Los Angeles freeway last winter. If found guilty, he could be sentenced to 90 days in jail! (Print Edition - 12/12)

Uh oh, it sounds like JLo's going after a bad boy now. This guy must be a straight up thug if he's been busted for not displaying the proper license plates and driving without a valid license. Everyone better be careful around this guy or he might fly off the handle and do something crazy like pop a cap in someone's ass double-park in a handicapped zone. It's just good to know that our homegirl, Jenny from the Block, is still keeping it real.

*5 Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez leaving the Lowell Hotel in New York and heading to the 2011 Glamour Women of The Year Awards (11/7)

Fresh off her split from Marc Anthony and apparently already bored with Bradley Cooper, Jennifer Lopez is now dating a dancer. No, not K-Fed. But admit it, you thought it was him for a second, didn't you? From People:

"Yes, [Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart] are dating and having a good time," a source tells PEOPLE of the pair. "They've been getting more open with their flirting for weeks."

Smart, who has appeared in Glee, Step Up 3D and How I Met Your Mother, reportedly also dances at Los Angeles-area nightclubs. Smart also reported that he and Lopez worked together on Friday night, posting on his Facebook page: "In Palo Alto Bout to do a show w/ Jennifer Lopez for some1s birthday."

Another source describes it as "a fun fling." Says the source: "It's not meant to turn into anything more."

Didn't JLo learn anything from Britney? Dating one of your dancers is worse for your professional career than changing your last name to Lohan. Hopefully JLo is a little smarter than Britney was and remembers the importance of wearing a condom. Because racist stereotypes have taught me that the only thing Latinas are better at than making a house clean is making a baby . . . and math. Wait, math? Aw god dammit, I'm confusing my racist stereotypes again.

*15 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

Bradley Cooper leaving J.Lo's house in Calabasas (10/15)

There was a rumor last month that Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lopez went on a date in New York. Well they're definitely doing more than just dinner together as Brad was spotted leaving Jennifer's house in Calabasas on Saturday. To quote the great Deena from Jersey Shore: They did sex. TMZ says:

Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lopez are not a couple just yet ... but a source close to the pair says they are indeed "casually dating." We're told the two enjoy each other's company but are keeping things simple for now. So while they aren't boyfriend/girlfriend yet, our sources say "they are definitely dating."

The two are "enjoying each other's company"? OK that settles it, this story has to be planted by a publicist. The last living being to willingly hang out with Jennifer Lopez were her twins, and that was only because they were locked in her womb for nine months and couldn't find a way out.

*5 Bradley Cooper pictures total in the gallery:

Paparazzi photos from Tuesday, September 20

Jennifer Lopez on the set of Parker in Miami (pics start here)

Hilary Swank and Jon Bon Jovi on the set of New Year's Eve in New York (pics start here)

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley arriving at her hotel in London (pics start here)

Anna Faris at the premiere of What's Your Number? at the Village Theatre in Westwood (pics start here)

Anna Kournikova arriving at LIVE! with Regis & Kelly studios in New York (pics start here)

Topher Grace leaving a gym in Beverly Hills (pics start here)

Maya Rudolph leaving Trousdale nightclub in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Nicole Richie out and about in L.A. (pics start here)

Kristin Cavallari leaving Dan Tana's in West Hollywood (pics start here)

Anne Hathaway arriving for a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Stacy Keibler at the "2nd Annual Appletown Estate Remixology Bartender Challenge" finals in New York (pics start here)

Kim Kardashian arriving for a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Demi Lovato buying her new CD at Best Buy in New York (pics start here)

Julianna Margulies arriving for a flight at LAX airport (pics start here)

Amanda Seyfried leaving Urth Caffe in West Hollywood (pics start here)

*118 paparazzi pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez on the set of a music video in L.A. (8/22)

I guess Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lopez are dating now or something. Either that or it's just a weird coincidence that they both got hungry at the same time, went to the same restaurant, and ended up sitting at the same table together. And then had sex. From TMZ:

We're told the two hit up Per Se, a restaurant located at Columbus Circle in New York City. We're told the dinner was "romantic" and was just the two of them.

This is an obvious play by Bradley. Single mothers of two with the temperament of a caged lion being poked with a stick don't just come along every day. You gotta lock those chicks up when you can. I'm just surprised he waited so long.

*10 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

J.Lo totally has a wedgie

Jennifer Lopez was in L.A. earlier this week filming a commercial for the new Fiat 500 and, BAM, check out the wedgie. You think that's impressive? One time, Kim Kardashian actually lost a pair of pants in her ass. They may still be there.

*40 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez at NRJ studios in Paris (6/14)

Of course he nailed a flight attendant. I wouldn't post that headline and then write a story about how Marc Anthony never had sex with a flight attendant because he's such a great family man. Us Weekly says:

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony announced their surprising split last Friday, but the duo came close to parting ways two years ago because of Anthony's fling with a flight attendant. In the new Us Weekly, out now, a source says that Anthony, 42, hooked up with a flight attendant he met aboard a private plane in 2009.

"Marc and Jennifer almost split up over it," the source tells Us of the couple, parents to 3-year-old twins Emme and Max.

Seconds another insider: "Jennifer was going to leave him then, but Marc begged her to stay. They went to marriage counseling and she decided to give it another shot. He was someone she truly loved."

In Marc's defense, having sex with flight attendants can be really fun. I'd rather put my penis into a beehive than Jennifer Lopez for seven straight years.

*16 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony split up

In a joint statement today, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony announced that they're splitting up. The couple have been married seven years and have two children, twins Max and Emme. They said:

"We have decided to end our marriage. This was a very difficult decision. We have come to amicable conclusion on all matters. It is a painful time for all involved, and we appreciate the respect of our privacy at this time."

Yikes, seven years of marriage to J.Lo. Give this man a medal. I was already sick of her by the seventh image in this gallery.

*11 Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony pictures total in the gallery:

Jennifer Lopez nip slip!

Jennifer Lopez appeared on the German TV show Wetten, dass..? on Saturday night, and apparently "Wetten, dass" means "show me your nipple" because that's what she did all show. But hey, she was in Europe so no harm no foul. If this happened in America, the incident would already have a nickname (HUGEnipplegate), and a Congressional committee would be forming. Seriously, we suck sometimes.

NOTE: To see the uncensored Jennifer Lopez nip slip pics, click any thumbnail with a yellow star on it and then click the "Full Size" button located at the top or bottom of the image.

*47 Jennifer Lopez pictures total in the gallery: