Jack Nicholson in St. Bart’s today
I really can’t talk shit about Jack because I admire his “work”. It takes a certain skill to plug as many famous chicks as he has over the years. With that in mind, I’ll just say he’s looking fat heavy overweight pudgy chunky tubby ponderous husky massive rotund obese portly . . . alive . . . really, really alive.
[Splash News]
Jack Nicholson vacationing in France (7/7/07)
Jack Nicholson admits that he was so promiscuous when he was younger that he may have fathered thousands of children. The actor told The Sun (UK):
“There could be 9,000 for all I know – I used to live so freely.” Jack, 70 – whose exes include actress Anjelica Houston – admits calming down with age. He said: “You can’t get too wild these days but I’m as wild as you can get.” (Source)
What’s the big deal with fathering 9,000 children? If you count “knuckle children,” I’ve fathered millions! Oh and the next time you watch the movie Batman, think about this particular line he said as the Joker, “Wait’ll they get a load FROM me!”
UPDATE: Wilt Chamberlain just called Jack and told him he was a pussy.
Jack Nicholson at the LA Lakers game (11/29)
Since you’ve been on your best behavior all week, I thought I’d give you ladies a little treat today *wink*
Jack Nicholson
70-years-old and still entertaining five ladies at a time in between bites of his hoagie. Jack Nicholson is my new God.
A few more of Jack Nicholson vacation in the South of France after the jump…
Jack Nicholson used what can best be described as an “interesting prop” during a scene in the upcoming movie “The Departed”—although director Martin Scorsese cut it out of the final version:
We told you back when they were shooting here that Jack had taken it upon himself to spice up his scene with two hookers by adding brutality, a mountain of coke and a rubbery, brown appendage. Scorsese told us at Tuesday’s premiere that he wasn’t shocked by Nicholson’s suggestions, because “this sort of sexuality was part of his lifestyle.” Mind you, he was talking about Jack’s character, Boston mob boss Frank Costello. Scorsese ended up whacking the prosthesis from the hooker scene. But it survives in an episode where Nicholson flashes Matt Damon’s character in an adult theater.
What’s more, Nicholson told us, “I’m planning to market a line of them on the Internet - in Day-Glo colors!”
Nothing screams “I am a man who truly understands women’s wants and desires” like a 12-inch hot pink dildo. If only it dispensed chocolate ice-cream and played Grey’s Anatomy repeats–I’d have to beat the ladies off with a stick. We can put a man on the moon but we can’t make a Swiss-Army dildo? I say rubbish to that sir!
