Despite rampant rumors that gorgeous Gwyneth Paltrow and rocker/hubby Chris Martin are hopping a fast train to splitsvillle, the star duo quietly invited immediate family only to attend a super-secret event this holiday season -- an eight anniversary renewal of their wedding vows!Gwyneth thought that having a "super secret" renewal of vows would quell the rumors that her marriage was on the rocks? How is that supposed to work? If it's secret, no one else knows about it and therefore it won't put an end to the rumors. You see, this is why I hate Gwyneth so much. She didn't do this for any other reason than to throw herself a party where she was once again the center of attention. Let's just hope she has another gathering like that soon . . . at the hospital . . . as doctors try to figure out why the mysterious bacteria is destroying her vocal cords.
"Actually, they'd always planned to renew their vows at the 10-year mark," said a source, "but decided to scotch recent rumors that they're on the rocks by doing it this year."
Gwyneth told a pal: "I don't care what people say about Chris and me, but to say we're splitting up affects our family." Admitting all relationships have rough edges, she insisted: "We couldn't be more committed to each other!" (Print Edition - 10/17)
"Before I didn't care about it. And I still refuse to use silicone, Botox or other of those gimmicks out of pure vanity. But a breast correction after breast feeding — why not? There's actually nothing else to restore the original condition, isn't there?"So plastic surgery is "pure vanity" and nothing more than a "gimmick" unless it happens to improve her appearance? What a hypocritical bitch. Gwyneth Paltrow bad-mouthing vanity is like Kirstie Alley belittling cheese cake -- as much as they like to deny it, it's just a part of who they are. Besides, if Gwyneth really wanted to improve her appearance, she wouldn't get her tits fixed -- she'd buy a muzzle.
Gwyneth Paltrow will join performers including Vampire Weekend, Ellie Goulding, Chromeo and the Naked and Famous at the Music to Know Festival presented by Bing in East Hampton on Aug. 13 and 14. Sources said she'll perform a short acoustic set in the event's VIP room on Aug. 13.No words can describe how much I hate this condescending beotch. However, if you've ever wanted to know why Gwyneth acts the way she does, her disposition can be summed up perfectly with a quote from former Dallas Cowboys Head Coach Barry Switzer: "Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple". So screw you Gwyneth Paltrow, some of us were born in the concession stand dumpster.
Spring Basics - In honor of a friend who asked that we make the GET clothing ideas easier to purchase, we teamed up with Net-a-Porter to do just that. Below are some of my picks for spring, great pieces which are versatile enough to wear to the office and during your summer leisure time.Oh, I can't wait to see Gwyneth's springtime fashion picks! I wonder if she'll suggest items that are affordable and attainable for the everyday woman, or you know, stuff that is completely fucking insane. I'm on pins and needles waiting to find out! From Us Weekly:
In the 38-year-old star's latest post on her healthy-living website GOOP.com, she shares her spring fashion picks. But dressing like the actress, author and lifestyle guru is going to cost you: $18,301 to be exact.In Gwyneth's defense, that $1840 silk jacket is absolutely *perfect* for Bharatpur's crisp spring nights, especially if you're going for a leisurely stroll along the Narayani River in the Chitwan District (the Nawalparasi District has just gotten way too commercialized over the years). What, you don't vacation in Nepal? Oh.
Paltrow, who is known for her super chic style, teamed up with luxury online retailer Net-a-Porter to put together six outfit concepts revolving around key wardrobe "basics" including a $785 Stella McCartney jersey tank dress, a $1840 Chloe silk jacket, and a $90 Kain T-shirt. The least expensive item is a Splendid cotton tank for $44.
Gwyneth Paltrow's quest to become the next Martha Stewart may be closer in sight. Gwyneth Paltrow's quest to become the next Martha Stewart may be closer in sight. Sources say the culinarily inclined star was shot in London for the June cover of Bon Appetit, posing for a cooking and entertaining feature for the Condé Nast title. The Post's Keith Kelly reported last week that Paltrow, who runs foodie lifestyle Web site Goop.com, is cooking up a food magazine with publishing powerhouse Hearst. Paltrow has a cookbook out next month, "My Father's Daughter."Shouldn't Gwyneth's book really be called, "I'm only Famous BECAUSE I'm My Father's Daughter"? If Gwyneth's father hadn't been a big shot Hollywood producer, none of us would even know who she was today. We wouldn't have to watch her wooden acting, read her condescending newsletter, or listen to her shrill voice when she sings. Frankly, I'd like to write a book too. I'd call it, "Thanks A Lot Gwyneth's Dad, You Fucking Asshole."
Glitter, 66, who served three years in a Vietnam prison for sexually assaulting two girls aged ten and 11, could receive hundreds of thousands of pounds in royalties from the song.Here's some advice for you Gwyneth: if you're trying to break into an industry, be sure to avoid tributes to sex offenders. For whatever reason, some people get their panties in a bunch when your actions help convicted child molesters earn hundreds of thousands of dollars. As an aside, this is exactly why I don't volunteer at my local church any more.
The Independent reports that Paltrow's version of the song, which was a 1973 Number Two hit for Glitter, is now available on iTunes following the screening of the show in the U.S. last week - meaning Glitter will receive publishing royalties.
Real name Paul Gadd, the disgraced star, who was deported back to the UK in 2008, will also get a performing rights fee for the song being aired on the episode, titled Sexy.
Would You Rather...? Spend one night with:
