Fatties

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In an interview with Rachael Ray next week (quotes via Us Weekly), Jessica Simpson seems a little too comfortable with the fact that she's getting fat and crazy:

"This week it's peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, toasted. And then, I'll put some salt on my hand like I'm taking a tequila shot and then take a bite of the sandwich."

The 31-year-old Fashion Star mentor also admitted her emotions are a bit more heightened than usual. "That's the one thing about pregnancy -- I'll cry at the drop of a hat," she said. "Even a great souffle would make me cry."

You really can't blame Jessica for constantly talking about food (see here). If you're a reporter, what the hell else are you going to talk to her about? If I ever interviewed Michael Jordan, you better be sure I'd ask him about basketball. Likewise, with Jessica, I bet 60% of our interview would be about peanut butter and things she likes to put it on. "I love me some PB & Soda! I spread it near the drinkin' hole!"

*11 Jessica Simpson pictures total in the gallery:

Pierce Brosnan in Kauai, Hawaii (11/24)

+ Imogen Thomas is in a bikini (site NSFW) [Drunken Stepfather]

+ 2011 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show preview [Guyism]
+ Miley Cyrus should keep that tape there [Celebuzz]
+ Jennifer Aniston pokies (site NSFW) [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ I heart sexy cheerleaders [Busted Coverage]
+ Fatty! [Just Jared]

+ You know the old "sweatin' like a whore in church" saying . . . [Dlisted]
+ I'd like to be up Ayanna Jordan and coming [Linkiest]
+ Oh, we're still talking about bullying? [Evil Beet]
+ Erin Heatherton has mastered the art of the handbra [Pick Me Up News]

LIST OF THE DAY: The 5 best ways to celebrate Cyber Monday

*7 Pierce Brosnan pictures total in the gallery:

Britney Spears has REALLY been enjoying London

As part of her "Femme Fatale" tour, Britney Spears performed at the O2 Arena in London last night, and since my mom taught me that if I don't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all, I'll just leave it at that. In related news, it looks like London sold out of fish and chips yesterday.

*30 Britney Spears pictures total in the gallery:

Steven Seagal out and about in Paris (10/21)

For some strange reason, Steven Seagal was in Paris last weekend. I say strange because there's no Taco Bells in Paris. How did he survive without his fourthmeal?

*5 Steven Seagal pictures total in the gallery:

Jessica Simpson at LAX airport for a flight to New Orleans (10/7)

"I'm buying a Cinnabon...at the airport...I arrived at. You understand why that's extra disgusting, right? Because when you're at the airport you're leaving from you can say 'Oh, I gotta eat. I need some food, because I might be trapped in the sky forever so I should eat right now.' But I've landed. The trip is over. I'm 20 minutes from my house where I got bananas and apples and shit. And I'm sitting on my luggage just fuckin' eating a Cinnabon with a fork and knife." -- Louis C.K.

*43 Jessica Simpson pictures total in the gallery:

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Christina Aguilera arrived on a flight Saturday night at LAX, and you can probably already tell from the headline pic, but she actually ate the co-pilot. It was quite shocking. She's in jail right now facing charges. The guy had a family and everything. So sad. Just so freaking sad.

*10 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera has some junk in the trunk

I don't know how I missed this last week, but here's some pics of Christina Aguilera at a recording studio in Burbank on Thursday. "Recording studio"? What a funny name for an all-you-can-eat buffet.

*31 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Kirstie Alley leaving her hotel in Tribeca (6/17)

I just wanted to remind everyone that last week Kirstie Alley said she's *this close* to having a 22-inch waist. Now to be fair, I didn't really want to write another story about her comments until I saw these pictures of her leaving her hotel last Friday. I think they really drive home just how fucking insane she is. The only part of Kirstie Alley that's 22 inches are her thighs

*15 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

Kirstie Alley leaving her hotel in New York (6/13)

Kirstie Alley -- whose weight has roughly mirrored the performance of the stock market over the past few decades (up, up, sometimes down, but mostly up) -- is well on her way to regaining the weight she lost during her appearance on Dancing with the Stars. I know, right? Aren't you totally shocked, too? From the National Enquirer:

After triumphantly slimming down on DWTS, Kirstie Alley has gone on a wild eating binge - and quickly packed on 12 pounds.

“No one expected her to keep up with the demanding 2000-calorie-a-day diet or grueling seven-hour dance sessions once the show was over, but Kirstie has returned to her bad old ways."

Losing DWTS - combined with not having a man in her life - has left her miserable, according to her friend. And Kristie has “been consoling herself by eating the best food the Big Apple has to offer… she’s put on about 12 pounds since the DWTS finale.”

In Kirstie's defense, she probably never would have regained this weight if bacon didn't taste like bacon. "It's not fair!"

*29 Kirstie Alley pictures total in the gallery:

"One time I ate a cheesecake THIS big!"

Christina Aguilera stopped by the Grove on Friday to do an interview with EXTRA's Mario Lopez. And then she ate him.

*27 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery: