Miss California Carrie Prejean was stripped of her title today -- not because of her "controversial" views on gay marriage, but because she wasn't living up to the terms of her contract. Just a month ago, she made headlines when Donald Trump let her keep her crown despite nude pictures of her leaking on the Internet. From FOXNews.com:
K2 Productions, the independent producers of the Miss California USA pageant, under license from Miss Universe, cited continued breach of contract issues as the reason for Prejean's firing. The decision was revealed in documents first obtained by FOXNews.com.
"This was a business decision, based solely on contract violations," Keith Lewis, executive director of K2 Productions, said in the documents. "After our press conference in New York we had hoped we would be able to forge a better working relationship. However, since that time it has become abundantly clear that Carrie has no desire to fulfill her obligations under our contract and work together."
But it was Trump who gave the final OK to fire her, FOXNews.com has learned.
"I told Carrie she needed to get back to work and honor her contract with the Miss California Organization and I gave her the opportunity to do so," Trump said in the same documents. "Unfortunately it just doesn’t look like it is going to happen and I offered Keith my full support in making this decision."
Breach of contract? How hard is it exactly to be Miss California? You cut ribbons and ride in parades all day. A monkey could do that. Aside from the Maytag repairman -- who I've learned often times doesn't even leave his repair shop because of the build and quality of Maytag products -- it might literally be the easiest job in the world.
Self promotion? From Donald Trump? Get the fuck out of here
There was a story circulating around yesterday that Donald Trump left a $10,000 tip on an $80 bill at the Buffalo Club in Santa Monica on Monday. Supposedly he wanted to upstage director Jerry Bruckheimer who had left a $500 tip on a $1000 tab. Turns out it's not true. Trump wasn't even in California on Monday. Trump told the New York Post:
"This was done by the stupid restaurant to get publicity. It's not my signature." (Source)
If I was Donald I might have kept my mouth shut on this one. I mean there's certainly worse things in world than having people believe you once left a $10,000 tip. Like cancer. Fuck you cancer!
I guess fighting with Rosie O'Donnell was getting boring so now Donald Trump is picking on Angelina Jolie. In an interview on Larry King Live earlier this week, Trump basically called her an ugly whore:
"And I remember at the Academy Awards a few years ago she was Frenching her brother. [Angelina] was giving her brother lip kisses like I never saw before in my life. And she had just said she made love to Billy Bob Thornton in the back of the limousine on the way over. And I wouldn't want to shake her hand, by the way. You know, you get back into the -- I wouldn't want to have shaken her hand. But she's being interviewed and she's all over the guy.
About three weeks later, he got caught cheating with about 15 different girls and she was gone. But she had just made love with him coming over to the Academy Awards. And now she's like this great beauty who is representing world peace and the United Nations. It's called give me a break. But she's not -- in terms of beauty, she's not a great beauty. She's a nice looking woman. She's OK. But she's not a great beauty." (Source)
I'm not sure Trump is the best guy to judge someone else's appearance. I heard that thing on his head is something he shot while fox hunting in England back in the late 70s and he still wears it for sentimental purposes. Besides, I'm sure his wife Melania is with him for his looks. Boy if I had a nickel for all of the supermodels marrying poor dudes 25 years older than them I'd have . . . *thinking* . . . carries the one . . . about as much money as I have in my bank account right now!
Donald Trump gave a press conference yesterday and tore View cohost Elisabeth Hasselbeck a new asshole calling her the "dumbest person on television." Still no word on why Trump held the press conference in a wind tunnel.
Leave it to Donald to add fuel to the fire that is The View. After reading about the supposed backstage spat between Barbara Walters and Rosie O'Donnell, Trump took it upon himself to fill Rosie in on the truth. I'm going to blockquote a nice little section of the letter, but the entire thing is comedic gold and you should read it after the jump.
To be exact, she said that 'working with her is like living in hell' and, more pointedly, 'Donald never get into the mud with pigs' and, 'don't worry, she won't be here for long.'
I think I'm going to call this the Trump triple play. When you think about it, this might destroy The View (hopefully I'm on to Donald's secret plan!) because any which way people are going to be pissed off. This letter is so insidiouslycrafted it's scary, kind of like my Uncle Bob's ice cream truck conversion. You would be surprised how easy it is to mount a dentist's chair in the back of one of those things if you remove one of the freezers. Don't worry, it still plays songs and draws a nice crowd at the local elementary school.
Stay with me here while I summarize this whole Donald Trump-Rosie O'Donnell mess. It all started earlier this week after Rosie called Trump a "snake oil salesman" and questioned his "self-made man" status after the real estate mogul said he wouldn't be relieving the troubled Tara Conner of her Miss USA crown. After Trump heard Rosie's comments he threatened to send one of his friends to steal Rosie's girlfriend Kelli Carpenter, called her "a woman out of control," and threatened to sue over misleading statements about his finances:
"You can't make false statements," Trump told People Magazine. "Rosie will rue the words she said. I'll most likely sue her for making those false statements - and it'll be fun. Rosie's a loser. A real loser. I look forward to taking lots of money from my nice fat little Rosie."
Today on The View, Rosie claimed she brought her girlfriend to the show because she "was afraid to leave her at home, in case someone with a comb-over came over and stole her from me." She also posted a lengthy Wikipedia entry about Donald's financial troubles on her blog, ending the summary with the following:
loving the wiki
i use it
do u
i will let u know if the donald sues me
or if kelli leaves me for one of his pals
dont u find him charming
Not to be outdone, earlier this morning Trump called into L.A. morning show "Good Day L.A." and declared verbal jihad against America's most portly lesbian. The highlights:
Regarding the rating surge "The View" experienced after Rosie was hired:
"I bring it up because they talk about me. Ultimately, that show will fail because of Rosie," adding, "Barbara (Walters) made a mistake. She cannot stand Rosie O'Donnell."
Regarding Rosie's intelligence:
"She's not very smart. I think Rosie is stupid."
Regarding Rosie's appearance:
"If you can look as ugly as she looks ... I give her credit for having succeeding moderately."
Regarding...uhhhh.....not exactly sure:
"She was like a little clam. A disgusting thought isn't it, when you compare Rosie to a clam?"
Jesus Christ! I'd make fun of these two but Donald already touched on Rosie's girth and Rosie already brought up Donald's comb-over. So really, nothing's left for me to do. I guess I'll just sit here and try to finish this word jumble. IT'S CRAZY FUN!
