Archive: Denise Richards

Denise Richards’ show canceled

Looks like all those stunts she pulled for ratings didn’t pay off. Denise Richards’ reality show Denise Richards: It’s Complicated was just canceled by E!. A source told The Insider:

“The numbers started out pretty good – just over 1.5 million tuned in for the premiere episode. But the audience has dropped off . . . viewers were disgusted that a mother of two young girls would use such foul language.” (Source)

What a stunning blow to the execs at E!. A dumb cookie-cutter reality show featuring a woman that hasn’t been interesting or relevant in years had trouble pulling in viewers. I really feel bad for all of Denise’s fans. Hopefully both of them will find another show to fill that 10:00-10:30 Sunday night time slot.

Raise your hand if you’re shameless

And you thought accusing ex-husband Charlie Sheen of molestation was bad enough? Now Denise wants to hook up with ex-flame Richie Sambora to boost the ratings of her fledgling reality show. This woman has no shame. From Mike Walker at the National Enquirer:

Now don’t drop dead from surprise, but the booze-challenged rocker won’t even take her calls. Insiders say Denise started phoning and texting Richie nonstop, begging him to rekindle their romance, and he talked to her patiently at first – telling her he’s just not interested, and has a new relationship cooking. Denise, refusing to take “NO!” for an answer, told pals she’s furious at Richie – yet won’t stop phone/text-stalking! (Source)

Why is Denise so in’fat’uated with this guy? He’s a missed house payment away from having to appear in one of those infomercials selling swampland with the Ponch. The only explanation I can come up with is that either Richie’s swinging some major lumber, or he can lick his own eyebrows. Either way, can you blame the guy for turning Denise down? Hanging out with her has got to be like riding a rollercoaster: sometimes you feel a little nauseous, and other times your ears just bleed.

[WENN]

Denise Richards is throwing mud

Denise Richards is willing to do anything to boost the ratings of her fledgling reality show Denise Richards: It’s Complicated, including accusing her ex-husband Charlie Sheen of molesting their children. Denise levied the charges against Charlie last week in court, though his lawyer got the so-called “evidence” dismissed. A source told the New York Post:

“Denise’s accusations were vile. She was basically trying to say Charlie [manipulated] the kids and acted inappropriately with them. It’s disgusting and totally untrue. Charlie is furious . . . Denise has really pushed it too far this time. She came after Charlie because the ratings on her E! reality show [’It’s Complicated’] have tanked and they were threatening not to renew. She thinks a court battle would be good for ratings so she wants all overnight visits with the girls ceased, and monitored visits with her nanny. She invited the media circus to the hearing and even wanted reporters in the judge’s chambers - which wasn’t allowed. It’s ridiculous. [Sheen is] out to prove Denise’s lack of veracity and sue her in civil court for defamation. Then he’ll sue for child custody.” (Source)

Is there anything this bitch won’t do for attention? Take her clothes off in a movie: check. Sell out her kids for publicity: check. Sleep with her friend’s overweight husband: check. Sadly the only gimmick Denise hasn’t orchestrated yet to get her name in the headlines is the one thing we all want her do anyway: overdose.

Richie Sambora and Denise Richards in Hawaii (1/2007)

Even though Denise Richards claimed on her reality show — a show in which she’s supposedly “setting the record straight” — that she never stole Richie Sambora away from friend Heather Locklear, Denise Richards definitley stole Richie Sambora away from friend Heather Locklear. A source told the New York Post:

“Heather has phone records that prove Denise was calling Richie while Heather was still married to him. Heather was such a good friend to Denise. She gave Denise clothes and offered her a shoulder to cry on when she and [now ex-husband] Charlie [Sheen] split up - there are even photos in the press of Heather taking Denise out after she and Charlie split. And then a few weeks later - not months - Denise starts dating Richie. For Denise to claim that not only did she not initiate contact with Richie but that she and Heather weren’t friends for three months before she took up with him, well, that’s just absurd and an outright lie.” (Source)

Can you really blame Denise for stealing away such a magnificent physical specimen like Richie Sambora? She couldn’t help it. So what if his eyes have more bags than a bellhop? Big deal if he’s still a fan of the mullet? And who cares if he looks like he’s smuggling illegals in his stomach? The bottom line is that he was perfect for Denise — both use their mouth to pay the bills.

[BauerGriffinOnline]

Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards are fighting again

The Charlie Sheen/Denise Richards feud is heating up again. Denise is making the rounds this week promoting her new reality show on E!. On Wednesday she claimed on the Today Show that Charlie faked the emails he claims Denise sent him begging him for sperm so she could have more kids. She told the New York Post yesterday:

“I don’t want Charlie’s prostitute-tranny-infested sperm. I have two beautiful kids. We’ll leave it at that. I am so over him. He’s the one who can’t move on. He’s disgusting, and he’s hit an all-time low.”

Denise also claims Charlie recently sent her a vulgar text message attacking her mother, who recently died of cancer:

“Last week, I sent Charlie a text message asking him if he’s going to Family Day [for daughter Sam’s school] and letting him know Sam was sick with a cold. His response was, ‘I hope you and your worthless retarded father get cancer and join your stupid mom. Rot in hell you [bleeping] whore. My mom died of cancer. This is what I deal with on a weekly basis. He missed Dad’s day at the school, and my father had to go in his place. And this is how he talks to me?” (Source)

Wow. These two fling more shit at each other than angry monkeys at the zoo. And who knows, with biting insults like “prostitute-tranny-infested sperm,” Denise might just have a future as a gossip blogger. Of course the real victims in this feud are the children. They’ll grow up to resent their father for his misogyny and envy their mother for her implants . . . so a lot like “Candy” down at the Spearmint Rhino.*

*slip her an extra twenty during your lap dance and she’ll let you be more “grabby.”

Denise Richards bikini pics! (Hawaii - 4/24)

“And now appearing on the main stage gentleman is the always sexy Denise!”

[Splash News]

Denise Richards bikini pics! (Maui - 4/23)

I’m almost positive the hula is just a made up dance to make drunken tourists look like idiots. Hawaiians don’t actually do that shit. Oh, and when you make that clever joke about being “lei’d,” they secretly want to punch you in the face. This concludes your friendly Celebslam PSA. Good day.

[INFDaily.com]

Getty

Pull up a chair because the Denise Richards/Charlie Sheen custody battle is starting to get good. From the New York Daily News:

Denise Richards walloped Charlie Sheen with a custody action yesterday, claiming he was an unfit dad. The “Two and a Half Men” star shot back: “Clearly the mother of my children has no interest in responsible co-parenting when it comes to my relationship with our girls. She behaves as though she owns our children. She does not. A day of legal reckoning for her is fast approaching. The truth will prevail.” (Source)

Wow, what a wordsmith! Interesting fact of the day: Did you know that Charlie Sheen wrote the first bible? It’s true! In the original version, Psalms 2, Chapter 8, Verse 7 read something like, “And when thou talketh to a prostitute, remindith her to swallow . . . lest she defile ye own’s carpet.” Another little known fact is that Charlie’s original version of the Ninth Commandment read: “Do not covet thy neighbor’s wife . . . unless she’s hot. Or if her husband’s not home. Or if she’s breathing. As a matter of fact, don’t live by any neighbors!”

Denise Richards out and about in Malibu earlier in the week

More of Denise after the jump…

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Denise, there’s better ways to get your name in the news than hanging out with Richie Sambora and flashing your vagina. Shooting sprees for example. Sure a few may be killed and you may even do a little time but, hey, guess who’d be the lead story on CNN? And for those of you who think these shots were merely the result of an eagle-eyed cameraman with perfect timing, how do you explain the fact that Denise held this pose for 43 minutes? Whore.

Note: People are claiming that Denise is doing cocaine in the pictures below. The people making these claims are retarded as Denise is obviously not doing cocaine. It’s meth. Kidding, it’s sunscreen.

More vagitastic shots after the jump…

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