Christina McLarty and Joe Francis at Tao nightclub in Las Vegas last year
David Arquette's officially moved on from Courteney Cox. He took Joe Francis' ex-wife Christina McLarty to the Camp Playboy event at Comic-Con last weekend. Awww, skanks and nipple tassles. How romantic. From
People:
Although approached by wrestler Alicia Fox - who invited him to a party - a chatty Arquette eventually made his way back to McLarty, and the duo "danced the night away together" on Friday, according to an onlooker.
The fun didn't stop for the pair. On Saturday night, the duo hit up the Entertainment Weekly Comic-Con party.
Even though David's moved on, you've still got to give Courteney some credit -- she did look super hot in
The Longest Yard. But this new chick that David's banging just has that little something that Courtney will never have: her 30's. Of course turnabout is fair play, so if you consider that Christina used to be married to Joe Francis, she probably has something that Courtney will never have too: the CDC on speed dial.
*5 Christina McLarty pictures total in the gallery:
David Arquette is in rehab David Arquette -- fresh off his split from Courteney Cox -- is in rehab. What a party pooper. No one likes a quitter, David. From
People:
"I really admire David and his choice to take charge and better his life," [Courteney Cox], tells PEOPLE. "I love and support him."
Arquette who separated from Cox in October and is dad to their 6-year-old daughter Coco, has been having trouble managing the separation, one source told PEOPLE recently. "He's just not handling this situation well," the source said. "He's really depressed."
So we're supposed to believe that David entered a drug and alcohol treatment center, not for a drug and alcohol problem, but because he was feeling a bit gloomy? Jesus, why not just say he went to the Moon? I could come up with a better excuse in 2 minutes using just a Boggle cube. I'll even let you shake it.
*18 David Arquette pictures total in the gallery:
David Arquette's new bodyguard will whoop your ass Pacific Coast News says that's David Arquette and his new midget bodyguard -- we'll call him 'Timmy' -- leaving Voyeur nightclub in West Hollywood last week. Apparently they had to leave a little bit early because Timmy split open some dude's lip at the bar who was talking shit about
It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie. OK not really, but he did accidentally get stepped on near the bathrooms. That's almost as interesting, right?
*10 David Arquette pictures total in the gallery:
David Arquette outside a friend's house in Brentwood (11/14)
Who could have predicted this, but it turns out that being rich, famous, and single is pretty damn awesome. Just ask David Arquette's penis. From the
New York Post:
David Arquette is making the most of the single life, following his split with Courteney Cox after 11 years of marriage. The actor, 39, partied until the early hours with a beautiful, 21-year-old female British tourist, her sister and a friend in a suite at LA's Mondrian Hotel, draining the minibar and prompting complaints from other guests due to loud music. Just hours after his late-night binge, Arquette was playing happy families with Cox and their daughter, Coco, at a Saturday charity event in Studio City.
A spy told Page Six, "David had befriended three attractive young British girls and ended up in a hotel room with them. He was drinking tequila and vodka and dancing closely with one gorgeous, leggy, dark-haired girl who was 21 and visiting from the UK. They had met earlier in the week and had been hanging out.
"The party got so rowdy that security knocked on the door to complain at around 3 a.m. But David was polite and turned the music down. They emptied the minibar. Then David left at around 4 a.m. with the girls in tow."
You know what's better than being married? Root canals, waterboarding, and foursomes with three women you just met. David must be kicking himself for staying married for as long as he did. If he'd known that meaningless sex with 20-something-year-olds was just a court-signed document away, he probably would have left Courteney Cox decades ago . . . when she turned 40.
*10 David Arquette pictures total in the gallery:
Jasmine Waltz leaving the Chamberlain hotel in West Hollywood (10/11)
David Arquette
claimed on the Howard Stern Show yesterday that he only slept with 28-year-old professional celebrity dater Jasmine Waltz "one time, maybe twice" while married to Courteney Cox. Not so fast, says Jasmine -- she spread her legs way more times than that:
Sources are telling TMZ ... Jasmine Waltz is indignant, claiming she had sex multiple times with David over the course of more than a month. She's saying she met David through a mutual friend and started dating.
People associated with David tell us ... everything that happened between David and Jasmine occurred after he separated from Courteney Cox and after they reached an understanding that they could date other people. Jasmine is backing up this story.
Oh no, now everyone in Hollywood will know that, after separating from his wife, David engaged in sexual intercourse with another consenting adult more than two times. He'll never work in this town again! Never!
*10 Jasmine Waltz pictures total in the gallery:
Jasmine Waltz in Malibu last August David Arquette discussed
his split from Courteney Cox with Howard Stern this morning on his radio show. Did he cheat? Did Courteney cheat? How long have they been split up? Have they told their children? Why does Courteney have an extra 'e' in her name? Does his mistress look like a fatter version of Megan Fox? Yes. Maybe. I don't know, but they haven't had sex in four months. Yes. I don't know, but it's bugging the hell out of me. Strangely, yes. From
Radar:
28-year-old bartender Jasmine Waltz is the woman eyed as Arquette's paramour, and the beauty has certainly danced with some of Hollywood's biggest names: prior to Arquette, she'd been romantically liked to Ryan Seacrest, Jesse McCartney (ed. note: that's her with Jesse above) and Paris Hilton's ex Doug Reinhardt.
Arquette told Stern he wasn't living with Waltz, "but I did have sex with her one time, maybe twice... my sexual encounter made me pretty feel manly."
Prodded by Stern about the couple's sex life, Arquette admitted he hadn't slept with Cox for four months, and said his "sex with Courtney is scheduled to a certain degree, its methodical to a certain degree, and so full of love ... its so beautifully passionate."
Arquette said he knew Cox and [Cougar Town co-star] Van Holt were involved in an "emotional affair" but was not aware if it had become physical. He added that "part of the terms of out separation was that I was allowed to see other people and so was she."
I don't get it. What does Jasmine have that Courteney doesn't? What does this hot young piece of ass -- who might as well have "
DTF" tattooed on her shoulder in big bold letters -- have that a menopausal 46-year-old woman with no sex drive doesn't? Huh? Tell me dammit, I want to know! Huh? I swear, I will never understand pigs like David. If you're going to cheat, don't get married in the first place. It's why I only bang teen runaways who've resorted to prostitution to survive on the streets. You can call me Prince Charming!
*10 Jasmine Waltz bikini pictures total in the gallery:
Courteney Cox is single After 11 years of marriage, Courteney "Don't Call Me Courtney" Cox and David Arquette announced their split yesterday (that's Courteney leaving her house late yesterday without her wedding ring on, because that's what single chicks do). The couple said in a joint statement:
"We have agreed to a trial separation that dates back for some time. The reason for this separation is to better understand ourselves and the qualities we need in a partner and for our marriage. We remain best friends and responsible parents to our daughter and we still love each other deeply.
"As we go though this process we are determined to use kindness and understanding to get through this together. We are comfortable with the boundaries that we have established for each other during this separation and we hope that our friends, family, fans and the media also show us respect, dignity, understanding and love at this time as well."
An insider told
Us Weekly:
"There's no ill will there. They just grew apart."
Of course David and Courteney grew apart. That tends to happen when you meet a 22-year-old aspiring actress (waitress) with 8% body fat, 34Ds, and no gag reflex. I'm sure David's been growing apart from Courteney a few times a week for the past six months.
*10 Courteney Cox pictures total in the gallery:
Ellen DeGeneres out and about in Beverly Hills (4/12)
Ellen DeGeneres left a nice, steaming present in front of Courteney Cox and David Arquette's house in Malibu a few weeks ago. PWN3D! From the
National Enquirer:
Ellen Degeneres was walking her pup on Aug. 5 in front of the Malibu home of her good friends Courteney Cox and David Arquette when the pooch made a special deposit. Ellen -- who didn't have a doggy bag for clean up duty -- looked around for eyewitnesses, and when she didn't see any, scooted away. (Print Edition - 8/17)
Of course Ellen didn't pick up the dog poop. If she had, her love life would have been ruined by the E. coli on her fingers. Besides, when you live in Hollywood you don't need to take responsibility for your mistakes. Just ask K-Fed. If Ellen's ever going to be able to look Courteney and David in the eyes again, she better let them do something equally as disgusting to her:
like Upper Deck her master bedroom toilet perform a White Dragon set her up with a man.
Courteney Cox and David Arquette outside STK restaurant in L.A. (6/20)
+
Megan Fox licking her lips [Drunken Stepfather]
+
Hilary Duff Bikini Pictures for a Change [Egotastic!]
+ Jon and Kate divorce not going well [
Just Jared]
+ Lily Allen is see through [
TaxiDriverMovie]
+ Kendra Wilkinson is also see through [
Bastardly]
+ Lindsay Lohan is a mess [
Popoholic]
+ Sneak preview of Shakira's new song [
Lossip]
+ Something smells like fish . . . [
Webster's Is My Bitch]
+ Kelly Clarkson punks Perez [
Cele|bitchy]
Would You Rather...? Spend one night with: