According to videographer Norm Pardo, O.J. Simpson may be the baby daddy of Anna Nicole Smith's daughter, Dannielynn Hope. Pardo became friendly with O.J. while amassing hours of footage of him between 2000 and 2005. Though it's extremely unlikely O.J. is the father, he did know Anna Nicole, having worked with her on the film Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult in 1994. According to Pardo, after Anna Nicole died Simpson began joking that he might be the father:
"I hope they don't do a DNA test on Anna Nicole's baby. If they find out Dannielynn is mine, I don't want Fred Goldman [the father of Ron Goldman, who was killed by O.J.]trying to seize her money - or the baby herself."
Pardo also revealed:
"[O.J.] said he knew Anna Nicole pretty well, and he said he had slow-moving sperm, and he might be the father." (Source)
I don't know who this O.J. Simpson character is but he seems like kind of a dick. I just did a Google search on him and he appears to be black. And since Dannielynn is whiter than a dude that's allergic to the sun, science says that O.J. can't possible be the father. Science also says the real father of my son is Jose, the Mexican dude that lives across the street. Screw you science, you lying son-of-a-bitch!
In other Anna related news: here come the freaks! Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband, Prince Frederick von Anhalt, 64, is speculating that he may the real father of Anna Nicole Smith's daughter Dannielynn Hope. He claims to have had a ten-year affair with the former Playboy playmate:
"If you go back from September, she wasn't with one of those guys, she was with me."
He said he would file a lawsuit if Dannielynn is turned over to Stern or Birkhead.
I don't know what's more shocking: the fact that another guy is stepping forward to claim "ownership" of Dannielynn or that Anna Nicole Smith has been having an affair with a Prince. I don't pretend to know the rules that govern titles of nobility but shouldn't sleeping with a cracked-out Playboy model for ten years at least get you demoted to baron level? Maybe he has one of those made-up names like my Dad and his stupid "King of the Grill" title. Well if you're the King, why is my hamburger undercooked? Asshole.
Warning: the above video contains footage of the birth of Anna Nicole Smith's daughter Dannielynn Hope. Actually I think a more appropriate phrasing is 'footage of the escape of Dannielynn Hope'. All kidding aside, think hard before you click the play button. If you have trouble watching those animal abuse videos PETA makes, you probably won't be able to get through this. Out of some perverse sense of journalistic obligation, I watched it. Now I won't be able to masturbate for the next few hours. THANKS A LOT ANNA
Larry Birkhead, who claims to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's newborn daughter Dannie Lynn Hope, filed a lawsuit on Monday, demanding that Smith return to California for a paternity test:
Birkhead filed the challenge because Smith has not responded to his attempts to communicate, Opri said. "The access had been cut off about the time of the birth of the child," she said.
On the surface, this story seems perfectly normal--guy simply wants to find out if he's the dad of this newborn baby--until you realize we're talking about Anna Nicole Smith here. The bitch is certifiably crazy. She wore a fucking bikini to her fake wedding a week after her son died. It was bad enough for Birkhead to admit he nailed Anna. To admit the baby is his means he'll have to deal Anna-Nicole for the next 18 years. This whole situation reminds me of a frilly maid's outfit. Oh sure I'll wear it--I'll probably even look return to California for a paternity test:
Birkhead filed the challenge because Smith has not responded to his attempts to communicate, Opri said. "The access had been cut off about the time of the birth of the child," she said.
On the surface, this story seems perfectly normal--guy simply wants to find out if he's the dad of this newborn baby--until you realize we're talking about Anna Nicole Smith here. The bitch is certifiably crazy. She wore a fucking bikini to her fake wedding a week after her son died. It was bad enough for Birkhead to admit he nailed Anna. To admit the baby is his means he'll have to deal Anna-Nicole for the next 18 years. This whole situation reminds me of a frilly maid's outfit. Oh sure I'll wear it--I'll probably even look damn sexy in it. But there's no chance in hell I'm claiming it's mine. I have a reputation to uphold.
Anna Nicole Smith's "longtime lawyer and confidante," Howard K. Stern, announced Tuesday on Larry King Live that he is the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby:
They have since named their baby girl Dannielynn Hope, Stern told King via a video feed. "Right now we have to somehow get through what we're going through, and I'll tell you, our baby is the one ray of hope." "It's been very rough [regarding the recent death of Smith's 20-year-old son Daniel]," Stern said. "She said that she didn't want to trade out children, meaning she didn't want one to be born and another to die."
As for the two of them, Stern said: "We love each other and it's been going on for a very long time and because of my relationship as her lawyer, we felt it was best to keep everything hidden. And we've done a pretty good job of that." They'll get married "at some point," he said. "We will. Right now we have to somehow get through what we're going through."
Did I miss something during my alcohol-fueled stupor over the weekend? When did Larry King Live turn into the Maury Povich Show?
Larry: "Howard K. Stern……you..…ARE the father."
Anna: "I tol' you, I tol' you fool! You payin' me child support now bitch! I tol' ya'll he was my baby's daddy!"
Howard: "Nah, man, nahhh…....bullshit"
Doesn't Larry King normally, like, interview Presidents and World Leaders and shit? Now I'm not one to question the journalistic integrity of anyone, not after last week's hard-hitting expose on Nicole Richie eating a sandwich, I'm just saying it's kinda weird.
