Christina Aguilera

Christina Aguilera arriving at In-N-Out Burger in West Hollywood (2/23)

Christina Aguilera stopped by In-N-Out in West Hollywood for lunch on Saturday, and if you've ever wanted to meet her, now's your chance, because I'm assuming she's still there. Right now. "Ma'am, if you want to stay any longer, you're gonna have to fill out this W-2."

*16 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera at the launch party for the new Samsung Galaxy Note II in Beverly Hills (10/25)

Christina Aguilera basically hates Lady Gaga because she's more popular than her. And has a lower body fat percentage. Weird -- Christina doesn't seem like the type to be a petty little bitch like that (yes I'm being sarcastic). An insider told Star:

"Christina is threatened by any successful woman, but Gaga really gets under her skin. Christina's fragrance line is her baby, and she's extremely territorial - especially since her album sales have tanked."

"When Gaga first arrived on the scene, Christina predicted she'd be a one-hit wonder. It drives her crazy that she was so wrong," says the insider, adding that Xtina may not stop with just words. "Christina can be really low-class and has been saying she wants to kick Gaga's ass! They could easily end up at the same party, especially with the holidays coming up. Things could really get out of hand." (Print Edition - 11/12)

It's true that, professionally speaking, Lady Gaga is stomping a mudhole into Christina and walking it dry. She's far more successful than Christina ever was and it will probably stay that way for the foreseeable future. But you know what Christina has that Gaga doesn't? One of those chair elevator thingies that carry you up the stairs so you don't have to walk up. Hah! Suck on that Gaga!

*10 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera arriving at Osteria Mozza restaurant in West Hollywood (11/5)

We finally have a full view of the damage caused by Christina Aguilera's appetite over the past few years - - and it is extensive . . . like Katrina/Sandy love child extensive. And it doesn't help that this picture was taken as Christina was walking into Mario Batali's fantastic restaurant Osteria Mozza last night. "Ma'am, would like another plate of meatballs? . . . ma'am? . . . excuse me, ma'am? . . . ma'am? . . . OK, give me one grunt for yes, two grunts for no."

*11 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera is a wee bit photoshopped

Via Jezebel, here's the ad for Christina Aguilera's new perfume Royal Desire. No, really, this is supposed to be present-day Christina Aguilera and not 15-years-ago Christina Aguilera. You know how you can tell it's been photoshopped? You can actually see the outline of her collarbone. You know how else you can tell it's been photoshopped? There's no bacon. FACT: In the current version of Christina's concert rider, she demands that she be "no less than 15 feet away" from fresh bacon at all times.

*5 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera doesn't wear underwear

In news that would have been hotter ten years ago and/or if it came from Jessica Alba, Christina Aguilera told Chelsea Handler last night that she doesn't like to wear underwear. Oh, the maid who does her laundry must be absolutely delighted. From E!:

"I don't like to wear underwear," Xtina said. "I like to be as free as possible at all times. It's just who I am ... It's empowering. It's pussy power!"

In Christina's defense, have you ever been to a Hometown Buffet wearing underwear? It's just so . . . limiting. Dammit, if I want another bowl of chili mac and maybe just a few more of those taters ooh and maybe put some cheese on them this time to make cheesy taters, I'm not gonna let some elastic wasteband digging into my midsection prevent me from doing so. Fuck you underwear.

*5 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera at the 40th Anniversary American Music Awards Nominations at the JW Marriott at L.A. Live (10/9)

Wow, these pictures are a blast from the past. I feel like I've hopped in a time machine and traveled back 10 years. No, not because Christina is as hot as she was in 2002, before she gained 50 pounds. But because I'm pretty sure she's wearing the same dress she used to wear in 2002, before she gained 50 pounds. No, not the same style. The exact same dress. Seriously, does she have a fucking funhouse mirror in her closet? How could she think that looks good?

*31 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera looks ecstatic

PICTURED: Christina Aguilera at the George McGovern Leadership Award Ceremony yesterday in Washington, D.C., at the exact moment they announced there would a catered lunch afterwards.

*15 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera gets shitfaced drunk

Christina Aguilera enjoyed a cocktail or nine celebrating the release of her new music video "Your Body" Friday night at Spago in Beverly Hills. When asked by a reporter outside the restaurant how her videos have evolved over the course of her music career, Christina responded, "no, no, no, really, you're my friend . . . no, really, I like you, man, you're my friend . . . I'm not just saying that, I like you, man . . . I swear I'm drunk not . . . I really like you, man, you're my friend" . . . *pukes all over sidewalk*

*20 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera a the ALMA Awards at the Pasadena Civic Auditorium (9/16)

Here's Christina Aguilera looking . . . um, yeah . . . at the ALMA Awards in Pasadena last night. And no, I don't know what the ALMA Awards is, but judging by Christina's presence, I would have to assume it has something to do with baking.

*11 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

That is just embarrassing

Christina Aguilera says she was too skinny in the past, which obviously isn't a problem anymore. Thanks cheesecake! She told Lucky magazine:

"Actually, the challenge I've always had is being too thin, so I love that now I have a booty, and obviously I love showing my cleavage. Hey, if you can work it and you can own it, that confidence is going to shine through."

Aguilera also feels relaxed having more control over her fashion choices, as she was previously told what to wear by her music industry bosses.

She adds, "When you're young, it's so easy to get bulldozed. There were these two ladies who worked at the record label who always wanted to come to fittings and dress me up like a Barbie doll. It was disgusting."

Hey, Christina finally beat Britney Spears at something. Remember when Britney and Christina would battle over who was the bigger star or the better entertainer, and Britney would always win? Well, we obviously have a winner in Morbidlyobesefest 2012. Britney might be a drooling hillbilly who can barely string together a sentence longer than one word, but at least she's in as good a shape as her 40-year-old body will allow her to be in. It looks like Christina had a nice run, but eventually just gave up. "Fuck it, left side of the menu for an appetizer, right side for an entree."

*10 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery: