Chris Martin

Gwyneth Paltrow at Fashion's Night Out in London (9/8)

Sounds like those rumors about Gwyneth Paltrow and her husband, Coldplay frontman Chris Martin, being on the rocks are false -- their marriage is doing fine (even though he probably nailed Kate Bosworth a few years ago). Ouch, sucks for Chris Martin. Dude, you want to get a beer or something? If you need a shoulder to cry on, just let me know. From Mike Walker at the National Enquirer:

Despite rampant rumors that gorgeous Gwyneth Paltrow and rocker/hubby Chris Martin are hopping a fast train to splitsvillle, the star duo quietly invited immediate family only to attend a super-secret event this holiday season -- an eight anniversary renewal of their wedding vows!

"Actually, they'd always planned to renew their vows at the 10-year mark," said a source, "but decided to scotch recent rumors that they're on the rocks by doing it this year."

Gwyneth told a pal: "I don't care what people say about Chris and me, but to say we're splitting up affects our family." Admitting all relationships have rough edges, she insisted: "We couldn't be more committed to each other!" (Print Edition - 10/17)

Gwyneth thought that having a "super secret" renewal of vows would quell the rumors that her marriage was on the rocks? How is that supposed to work? If it's secret, no one else knows about it and therefore it won't put an end to the rumors. You see, this is why I hate Gwyneth so much. She didn't do this for any other reason than to throw herself a party where she was once again the center of attention. Let's just hope she has another gathering like that soon . . . at the hospital . . . as doctors try to figure out why the mysterious bacteria is destroying her vocal cords.

*30 Gwyneth Paltrow pictures total in the gallery:

Kate Bosworth in Beverly Hills (10/19)

Coldplay's Chris Martin may be cheating on his wife with Kate Bosworth, which isn't really that surprising since his wife is a succubus. From Star:

The Internet is already abuzz with Star's exclusive story about Coldplay frontman Chris Martin's hot make-out session with a beautiful blonde who wasn't Gwyneth Paltrow. In fact, the Brit singer was locking lips with his better half's good friend, Kate Bosworth!

"I couldn't believe my eyes," an eyewitness tells Star in our Nov. 16 issue. "There was Chris totally making out with Kate in front of other people. At first I thought it might be Gwyneth, but when she came up for air, it was clear the woman was Kate!"

This isn't fair. Kate is 26, gorgeous, and seems like a really cool chick to sit down at the local pub and have a pint of Guinness with. Gwyneth is 37, whiny, and doesn't drink beer unless it's from her favorite brewery in the charming little city of Kuala Terengganu, Malaysia, that she spent a few nights in during the summer of 2008 and oh my gosh you simply must visit especially during the amazing Thaipusam Festival that takes place at the end of January seriously why haven't you gone yet. I imagine making out with Gwyneth would be a lot like making out with fire.