Linda Hogan is fucking crazy
The Hogan Family feud just got stepped up a notch. And Brooke Hogan better watch the fuck out. Because if she doesn't shut up and stop lying every time she opens her mouth, she'll be facing the lyrical bullets of
her mom's boyfriend Charley Hill. From
OK!:
The Hogan family has been going back and forth lately, with Brooke Hogan laying accusations of drug use at her mother Linda Hogan's door. Linda then responded by saying her daughter had breast implants, among other things: "[If] Brooke continues to spew lies on behalf of her father's lame attempt to distance himself from the reality that he is no different from the homicidal OJ Simpson, [Linda's new boyfriend] will be forced to put aside his paramedic/firefighting career path and release an album called 'Redemption' which will easily surpass any of Brooke's records sales."
I've heard a lot of crazy shit in my day but threatening to turn your boyfriend into a pop star has to be near the top. I just hope Brooke doesn't take this threat too lightly. Just imagine if Charley suddenly had an album for sale on iTunes. She might literally die.
Linda Hogan and Charley Hill at the Palms Hotel in Las Vegas (5/31)
Apparently the $40k in alimony Linda Hogan is getting from estranged husband Hulk Hogan just isn't enough. She wants a Pinellas County, Fla., judge to the increase the amount of the temporary payments she's receiving (the couple's divorce isn't final yet). Why? So she can send her 19-year-old boyfriend to school of course. Obviously. From TMZ:
Recession or not, it's extremely hard to balance a budget on $40,000 a month. That's why Linda Hogan needs more. Oh did we mention -- she wants Hulk to foot the bill for her 19-year-old boyfriend's nautical tuition?Charley Hill wants to go to sea school, and Linda wants Hulk to pay for what could be the next Captain & Tennille. Getting back to why $40,000 isn't enough, Linda blew $14 grand at a Bev Hills Doctor's office this week. Hulk says it's for cosmetic surgery. (Source)
You have to empathize with Linda. How is she possibly supposed to live on $40,000 a month? Her hair dye, spray on tan, and saline replacements alone cost more than that. The silver lining is that Charley doesn't need to pay to go to nautical school. If he wants to learn about sea life, he just needs to put his head between Linda's legs. There he'll find crabs, a clam, and the distinct smell of fish.
Brooke Hogan and Charley Hill
Brooke Hogan has finally commented about her 48-year-old mom's relationship with 19-year-old Charley Hill. Basically, she's freaking out. In an off-air conversation with E! satellite radio host Michael Yo, Brooke said:
"I'm totally freaked out. I personally don’t like it at all or condone it, but she's my mom, so I have to show her support . . . I went to school with him. He was a grade under me . . . Me and Nick know him well. Me and Nick are two years apart, and he was right between us (in school)." (Source)
I like how E! had to clarify that Charley was between Brook and Nick (in school). The Hogan family is so fucked up that if E! left that out, naturally we'd assume they had some kind of freaky threesome. Seriously, I wouldn't put anything past this family at this point. Saying that Linda and the Hulk failed as parents is like saying Hitler failed at diplomacy.
[Splash News]
Linda Hogan is creepy
As if Linda Hogan's relationship with 19-year-old Charley Hill couldn't get any creepier, TMZ did some digging and found that Charley was friends with Linda's son Nick when they were kids. All together now: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww. TMZ says:
We hear 19-year-old Charley Hill was "definitely friends" with Nick Hogan when they were kids, and we we're told he was an altar server at the church the Hogan family attended in Florida years ago. Holy jail bait! Charley was only one grade above Nick, and our sources tell us the two often played sports together. (Source)
The kid was an alter server? No wonder these two get along so well. Linda has all the traits Charlie's looking for from his past relationships: facial hair, testosterone, and a pastoral staff! This story kind of reminds me of a porn site some people* visit where the moms hook up with their son's friends. Of course the main difference is that on those sites, the moms usually look like women.
*Me
[Splash News]
