Audrina Patridge at The Bank nightclub at the Bellagio in Las Vegas (7/3)
Audrina Patridge has become a pariah on the set of
The Hills. Everyone hates her -- even Joe the cameraman and Mitch the stuntman. It's true. They told me. From
Life & Style:
"I don’t really get along with Audrina," Jayde Nicole, girlfriend of The Hills’ Brody Jenner, tells Life & Style. "Kristin [Cavallari] doesn’t get along with Audrina, I don’t think anyone on the show really gets along with Audrina. Everyone just welcomed Kristin and loves [her]. Maybe Audrina’s jealous of that. I don’t really know why they have this big beef."
I bet I know what isn't causing a rift between Audrina and the other
Hills castmates: her view on world politics. She probably thinks 'World Politics' is a rapper. "He's from Florida right?"
Audrina Patridge at LAX airport (6/17)
For those of you needing a weekly fix of Audrina Patridge after
The Hills is [hopefully] canceled, fear not -- production is set to begin on her new reality show shortly. Oh joy. My TiVo is already set. From
Star magazine:
In March, the TV hottie said she had inked a preliminary deal with producer Mark Burnett. Now that the details have been ironed out, filming will begin on the tentatively-named The Audrina Show at the end of the summer.
The reality star describes the series as "spicier, edgier [and] older" than The Hills and says it will focus more on her romantic life.
How is it possible that anything starring Audrina Patridge could be considered "spicy" or "edgy"? The bitch looks comatose. The fact is, no matter what her show is about, it will be just as compelling if watched on mute. As the law of physics clearly states, "masturbating to a moron while they speak is physically impossible" -- which I wish I had known before wasting ten bucks on this Jessica Simpson autobiography book-on-tape . . . "Chapter 2: Paste -- A Surprisingly Tasty Between-Meal Snack."
Audrina Patridge at the MTV Movie Awards in L.A. (5/31)
Audrina "
Star Fucker" Patridge is single. She got dumped by
Star Trek star Chris Pine after just a few weeks of dating. Ouch. From
Hollyscoop:
Hollyscoop has learned exclusively that Chris Pine has split up with The Hills star because of the way the media has been obsessing over it. Apparently all of us were more excited about the pairing than he was! Chris and Audrina had only been dating a few weeks. They were first spotted together having dinner in LA, and were even seated next to each other at the MTV Movie Awards.
A source tells Hollyscoop exclusively, "Chris Pine was forced to dump Audrina because his camp wants him to take the right strategic steps to become a big movie star. Dating a reality show star would tarnish his image."
That is just unfair. Audrina is so much more than a reality show star. For example, she is a world-class finger painter. I would put her up against some of the top six and seven-year-olds in the country. Easily.
Audrina Patridge leaving Kitson boutique in West Hollywood (5/21)
There's already drama on
The Hills between Audrina Patridge and newcomer Kristin Cavallari (playing the part of Lauren Conrad
this season).
Yesterday Audrina revealed to Ryan Seacrest on his radio show that the two got into it while filming a bonus episode of the show:
"I don't like her . . . When someone gets in my face, I have to defend myself. And, you guys, I mean, I can't say much. They'll show it, but I mean, all I have to say is, it's really pathetic and desperate what people will do when the cameras are around. It was my birthday, and I was like, Oh, my God. Is this what we're going to have to deal with?'"
It's only downhill from here. It's pretty obvious what Audrina needs to do. She needs to walk away from
The Hills and try to make it in the real world. Wait, are there any 9-5 jobs that involve coloring?
Audrina Patridge leaving her birthday celebration at Beso restaurant in Hollywood (5/9)
It came out earlier this week that Audrina Patridge is dating
Star Trek star Chris Pine (the two were
spotted at a bar together earlier this week -- Audrina's in the lower left of the pic). Though they've only been dating for a short time, their relationship already has that certain fairytale aspect to it. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if Nick Cassavetes (director of
The Notebook) bought the rights to their love story and made a movie. From Bill Zwecker at the
Chicago Sun Times:
The scoop from one-who-should-know has it that TV reality star Audrina Patridge's interest in new beau and "Star Trek" star Chris Pine goes further than him being a charming, great-looking guy.
"She's totally into him because she's a real star fucker, and the word is Chris is on the fast track to superstardom. ... People think he could very much be the next Tom Cruise," a top agent and associate of Patridge's told me this week.
I can picture Audrina's epitaph now:
Actress
Model
"A real star fucker" Unfortunately for Audrina, if Chris Pine does turn out to be "the next Tom Cruise," not only is she not his type (she has a vagina), but he'll probably try to brainwash her into joining some goofy cult. Of course, considering whose brain we're talking about here, he wouldn't have to try too hard.
Audrina Patridge arriving to a business meeting in Gardena (5/13)
Judging by the
pics of her last week and these yesterday, I think it's now clear that Audrina Patridge doesn't own a piece of clothing that isn't see through. I called her a hero last week so what's that make her this week? Superhero? I think the least she deserves is a spot on Mt. Rushmore. We can get rid of Jefferson. I mean, what the fuck did that freeloader ever do?*
*I reserve the right to rescind these comments if Audrina ever discovers the joys of pie
like Jessica Simpson
Audrina Patridge outside h.wood nightclub in West Hollywood (5/4)
Finally a famous chick who gets it. Look average hot chick in Hollywood, we don't care about your acting, your singing, or how many followers on Twitter you have. We just want you to dress in slutty clothes. It's refreshing to finally see someone who understands that. I stand up and applaud you Audrina. You're a true American hero in every sense of the word.
Audrina Patridge out and about in Hollywood (4/22)
+ Britney, Miley, and Heidi make Baby Jesus cry [
The Superficial]
+ Mia Farrow going on a hunger strike [
I'm Not Obsessed]
+ Boobies! (
NSFW) [
College Humor]
+
Amy Winehouse has a new skin disorder [Drunken Stepfather]
+
Lisa Rinna Bikini Pictures [Egotastic!]
+
Rachael Ray is see through [Hollywood Tuna]
+ Now that is one sexy mug shot [
Dlisted]
+ Mischa Barton is a fashion freak [
Bastardly]
+ Timberlake and Biel make out at the Lakers game [
The Blemish]
+ Studios must hate Tom Cruise [
Cele|bitchy]
+ Big A-list booty [
CityRag]
+ Guess the boob anomaly [
Double Viking]
+ The ten best cop shows currently on TV [
Pajiba]
+ Emma Watson is a little minx [
Derek Hail]
Top 10 Bad Hollywood Boob Jobs by Dan the Celebman
Nothing makes shallow celebs happier than a stiff injection of saline solution. But just like with Kevin Costner's acting career, things sometimes go horribly wrong.
NOTE: Make sure you click through the gallery for individual comments under each picture.
Audrina Patridge out and about in Beverly Hills (2/23)
It was announced earlier this month that Audrina Patridge is leaving
The Hills after the end of the current season to star in a reality series produced by Mark Burnett (of
Survivor and
The Apprentice fame). Perhaps diffusing what might be an awkward situation on "set," the producer of
The Hills, Adam DiVello, is going out of his way to wish Audrina a fond farewell. Or not. From the
New York Post:
A source tells Page Six that at a recent cast photo shoot for the MTV show, DiVello "completely lost his cool and was anything but professional" over star Audrina Patridge (above), who the day before had announced a development deal with "Survivor" producer Mark Burnett. As soon as Patridge left the shoot, says our source, "DiVello went on a tirade, cursing her in front of other cast and crew." (Source)
Adam's just jealous. He could've gotten his own deal with Mark Burnett if, like Audrina, he'd taken the necessary steps to advance his career. Of course, by "necessary steps," I mean get his chest enlarged, teeth laminated, and brain lobotomized. My advice to Adam: If you want to stop being outwitted by big-breasted imbeciles, start working at a strip club . . . or
for her.
