Archive: Alex Rodriguez

Alex Rodriguez is consistent

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I saw ten people wearing that shirt last time I was in Vegas

Looks like Alex Rodriguez finally realized that leaving your wife for a woman who looks like an anorexic, roided-out man is actually a step down. According to the New York Post:

A-Rod stepped out with a mystery blond last Wednesday night, starting with a cozy dinner at Dan Marino’s in South Beach. The duo showed up around 9 and shared a “fairly animated” dinner conversation, spies told Page Six. “They looked to be thoroughly enjoying themselves,” said one source.

Just as Madonna had finished wiping the tears from her blank, lifeless eyes, A-Rod gave her one last kick in the stomach for good measure:

Back in New York on Sunday night, Rodriguez hit the roof of Soho House with a tall Asian beauty with “good hair,” sources report. And this time, instead of trying to pretend he wasn’t with a woman, A-Rod - decked out in jeans, a white T-shirt and black patent-leather Nikes - was “out-of-his-way nice” to the staff. “He seemed in great spirits,” said one spy.”

Of course he was in great spirits—the story said he was with a “tall Asian beauty.” Madonna looks like one of those titless, overly tanned women in the body-building shows. There’s no way I want to piss that beast off. Hey Madonna, I have a couch that needs to be moved—are you free this afternoon?

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Madonna breaks up A-Rod’s marriage

Madonna A-Rod affair causes divorce
Cynthia Rodriguez soon to drink A-Rod’s milkshake

Alex Rodriguez’s wife Cynthia officially filed for divorce today in Miami’s Dade County Family Court. And it’s all that bitch Madonna’s fault. While Cynthia claims in the divorce papers that her husband had “multiple extra-marital affairs,” according to her lawyers, Alex’s relationship with Madonna was “the last straw.” The soon-to-be-single Mrs. Rodriguez told the New York Daily News that Madonna is using “mind control” over her husband:

A-Rod’s wife Cynthia Rodriguez believes Madonna used Kabbalah to brainwash her husband and convince him to leave her, according to a new report in New York’s Daily News.

“I feel like Madonna is using mind control over him,” Cynthia, 34, told a pal, according to the News. “I don’t recognize the man he’s become. He was a sweet, beautiful, loving husband and father. Today, he’s very cold and calculating.”

Cynthia - who is “devastated” about splitting with her husband of five years - also “found a letter where Alex told Madonna: ‘You are my true soul mate,’” a source close to the couple told the News. (Source)

It’s not the power of Kabbalah that’s brainwashed A-Rod, it’s the power of the poontang. Unfortunately for Cynthia, she never had a chance competing with Madonna in that department since Madge’s screwed more Latino men than La Migra. But perhaps this is all just a big misunderstanding. The “Material Girl” is probably just dating A-Rod because she’s looking for more lyrical genetic material.

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[BauerGriffinOnline]

Everyone’s f’ing everyone

A-Rod’s wife is banging Lenny Kravitz

This Madonna/A-Rod story just got a little more interesting. The New York Post claims A-Rod’s wife is now “seeing” Lenny Kravitz who, of course, used to “see” Madonna . . . repeatedly against the wall into the wee hours of the morning. To recap: A-Rod’s wife, used to bang A-Rod, now banging Lenny Kravitz. Madonna, used to bang Lenny Kravitz, now banging A-Rod. And of course Madonna, Kravitz, and Rodriguez all have the same manager: Guy Oseary. My head hearts. From the New York Post:

Yankee superstar Alex Rodriguez’s marriage is kaput, sources told The Post. A-Rod’s wife, Cynthia, has been shacked up with rocker Lenny Kravitz in Paris.

The stunning news emerged a day after revelations that Alex Rodriguez has been paying late-night visits to Madonna’s Upper West Side apartment. Cynthia Rodriguez, 34, has been in Paris for at least the past four days visiting Grammy-winner Kravitz. C-Rod was seen outside the 44-year-old Kravitz’s pad in the romantic City of Light as recently as Tuesday night.

Well at least there’s no kids involved.

[Alex and Cynthia’s] two daughters - 3-year-old Natasha and 2-month-old Ella - remained in Miami, sources said. (Source)

Oops.

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[WENN]

Madonna and A-Rod? WTF?

Madonna having an affair with A-Rod?
Madonna and A-Rod might be having an affair

Us Weekly is hinting that Madonna and the very-married New York Yankees’ star Alex Rodriguez are having an affair. Apparently A-Rod has made numerous late-night visits — “as late as midnight” — to the singer’s New York City apartment. A source told the mag:

“All the doormen are talking.”

Rodriguez attended Madonna’s April 30 NYC concert; the singer sat in his seats at a Yankees game on June 22 (it was the first time she ever was photographed at a Yankees game). Her son Rocco, 7, also sported Yankees gear on June 25 while playing in Central Park.

Complicating matters: Former Yankee slugger Jose Canseco – who once dated Madonna – wrote in his book Vindicted that he “hates [A-Rod’s] guts” because he once hit on his wife. (Source)

It’s surprising that Madonna wants “A-Rod” . . . I’d have guessed she wanted more than one. If Madonna’s relationship with A-Rod is like any of her previous ones, expect the slugger to be demoted to Triple A by the end of the week. I’d say Madonna’s vadge is like a “cooler” for men’s careers, but typically there’s only a burning sensation associated with it. At least now we know who Canseco and A-Rod’s steroid dealer was!

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[BauerGriffinOnline]

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