July 2012 NUDE!

Natalie Suliman

English model Natalie Suliman

*22 Natalie Suliman pictures total in the gallery:

Christina Aguilera arriving at The Voice studios in Burbank (7/27)

Haven't seen this yet on any of the million promo commercials that have aired during the Olympics, but the new season of The Voice is going to feature 100% more cankles than last season. Can't wait!

*12 Christina Aguilera pictures total in the gallery:

What actress does that butt belong to? Identity revealed on PAGE 2 (click the picture to jump) . . .

+ Cheryl Cole is a sexy little bitch [Caught on Set]

+ I can see Miley's underwear [Drunken Stepfather]
+ Bathroom sex! [The Superficial]
+ The best underwater movie nude scenes (NSFW) [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ Matt Damon goes 70's porn star look [Celebuzz]

+ Robert Pattinson is keeping the damn dog [Evil Beet]
+ Bradley Cooper is the Elephant Man [Socialite Life]
+ Bitties on a boat [Double Viking]
+ Snoop's mind has been warped by weed [I'm Not Obsessed]

BIKINI PICS OF THE DAY: Rosie Jones in a bikini-looking getup

*25 pictures total in the gallery:

Kris Jenner and Kourtney Kardashian leaving Barneys New York in Beverly Hills (7/5)

If there's anything we know about the Kardashians, it's that once your umbilical cord is cut, you better start earning your keep. Which doesn't make this story from Radar about Kris Jenner trying to make a quick buck off her new granddaughter Penelope that much of a shock:

"Kris immediately started trying to make money off the baby, literally from the moment she was conceived! Even Scott stepped in and told Kris to back off, he actually told her they needed time to enjoy their baby before they share her with the world. But Kris was relentless and started taking photos with the intent to sell them, and the whole family knew it.

"The last straw was when Kris wanted to take pictures of the baby during the birth, while she was coming out! Scott drew the line there, he said absolutely not! Both Kourtney and Scott have told Kris to step away, their baby is not some money making tool. They have a deal in place with a magazine to run the first photos of Penelope, but after that they want a little privacy for her."

Kourtney could stand to lighten up on granny Kris. Who can blame Kris for doing what she does best, which is selling children? Look, the porn star and kong are both cum dumpsters, but unlike Kourtney, their wombs are barren -- which means money will never, EVER, fall out of their vaginas. Until Team Jailbait are officially in heat, you'll have to leave it to little Penelope's bikini shots to pay for your Kardashian lifestyle.

*10 Kourtney Kardashian pictures total in the gallery:

Cuba Gooding Jr. leaving Cirque Du Soir nightclub in London (5/23)

An arrest warrant has been issued for Cuba Gooding Jr. after he pushed a female bartender in New Orleans last night. I got your tip right here, bitch. Remi Braden, the Director of Public Affairs for the New Orleans Police Dept, told Celebuzz:

"There has been an arrest warrant issued for [Gooding Jr.] for municipal battery. Apparently he pushed a bartender twice at the bar. He was apparently getting rowdy when people were trying to take photos, and he got aggravated. The bartender tried to calm him down, at which time he allegedly pushed her, and before he left the bar he pushed her again. When he left, it was either the bartender or her boss that immediately called the police. We are currently looking for him."

Municipal battery? Pshhhh. The real crime is the amount of whiskey this bartender puts in a Manhattan. Is this a bar or a sober living facility? Am I right fellas, or am I right?

*5 Cuba Gooding Jr. pictures total in the gallery:

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Tiffani Thiessen

Tiffani Thiessen leaving Sirius Radio in New York (7/30)

*15 Tiffani Thiessen pictures total in the gallery:

USA! USA! USA!

Olympian Ryan Lochte's mom is very naive -- she thinks he's "too busy" for girls. Yeah, right. Guarantee this guy's plowing through ass at the Olympic village like a riding mower. From Us Weekly:

At Procter and Gamble's Thank You Mom family home in London July 26, the swimmer's mother, Ileana Lochte, chatted with Us Weekly about why her sought-after son is still single. "He's too busy! He's so warmhearted that I don't think he'd want to have a relationship with somebody," she explained. "I don't think he wants to get into a relationship ... It just wouldn't be fair to the girl. He doesn't have the time."

Look friends, I can't be too vulgar in regards to Ryan because I have it on good authority that Mother Lochte reads this happy little site of ours (and who could blamer her?). Being a gold-medal winning Olympic swimmer and all, Ryan is a big deal in the sports world, but we have to remember something about gold medals: for every medal an athlete wins, his penis grows an inch. Remember the Phelps kid? Before Athens, Aquaman occasionally picked up a chick hanging out at the pool at the local YMCA. After the Sydney games, Supercock had his pick of supermodels. I can only guesstimate the insane amount of vaginal discharge that Ryan must be swimming through now. Probably not as high quality as what a master of the interwebs like yours truly sees, but not too far below my standards.

*5 Ryan Lochte pictures total in the gallery:

Katy Perry in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil (7/30)

Katy Perry put on an impromptu show last night in Brazil, flashing her crotch to a bunch of people hanging out below her hotel balcony, one of whom was a paparazzo with a telephoto lens. I know, right? How could this slut not know that people 300 feet below could see her underwear? I bet she showers naked, too. Whore.

NOTE: To see the uncensored Katy Perry pics, click the picture above or any thumbnail with a yellow star on it and then click the "Full Size" button located at the top or bottom of the image.

*15 Katy Perry pictures total in the gallery:

Charlize Theron and Kristen Stewart at a photocall for Snow White and the Huntsman at Casa de America in Madrid, Spain (5/17)

Add Charlize Theron to the list of people mad at that homewrecker Kristen Stewart for crushing the heart of Robert Pattinson and destroying the marriage of Charlize's friend Liberty Ross. I smell a chick fight coming! Via the New York Post:

Theron struck up a friendship with Stewart on the set of [Snow White and the Huntsman], but is also friends with [director Ruper] Sander's wife Liberty Ross, who also had a part in the movie. The scandal involving Stewart and Sanders that broke this week now has put Theron in an "difficult position," the site says.

"Charlize is absolutely fuming with Kristen for having an affair with Rupert," an insider tells Radar. "She is very tight with Liberty, has often socialized with the family over dinner and cannot believe Kristin has done this ... When they were filming... Charlize felt like an older sister to Kristin, and they were always sharing advice."

Who can blame "big sister" Charlize for being mad at her little pig of a sister? I think the only way to teach Kristen a lesson is for Charlize and Liberty to strip naked, baby-oil themselves and the dirty little girl up, and give Krissy a stiff spanking while I film the encounter. Yeah, spank her until she cries, or at least cracks a smile -- whichever comes first. I know, it's a bit harsh, but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make if it will save a friendship and a marriage. No need to thank me, I'll be thanking myself later, over and over again.

*12 Charlize Theron pictures total in the gallery: