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Lindsay Lohan totaled her Porsche

Lindsay Lohan was hospitalized this afternoon after rear-ending an 18 wheeler in her Porsche on PCH in Santa Monica at noon. According to TMZ, both Lindsay and her assistant (the passenger) were bleeding and bruised, but both were conscious after the accident. An ambulance was called to the scene, but only her assistant took it to the hospital.

Gee, who could have predicted that the "Lindsay Lohan + Car that Goes 0-6 in 4.2 seconds" experiment would end in such a manner? When she gets out of the hospital, maybe she can start driving around the Space Shuttle.

Of course, after the accident, Lindsay was heard saying that it wasn't her fault and that the 18 wheeler cut her off. Of course. She'd probably have Natalie Portman's career and millions of dollars in the bank right now if not for that fucking 18 wheeler. Thing is clearly out to get her. Probably just jealous.

UPDATE (3:45 PST): And Lindsay's already out of the hospital. And looks suspiciously fine (below). This all seems like an elaborate ploy to steal Vicodin. Does she even have an assistant?

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  • Rummysdog

    Thank all the gods that Goddess Lohan was uninjured. She can continue her good works and help to humanity.

  • Nate Blank

    Space Shuttle? That thing was decommissioned a year ago.

  • John M

    According to TMZ she drove it into the back of a truck. Nothing like watching the road ahead is there?

    That car is fucked. The stupid Lindsay has Porsche's engineers to thank for the fact that she's not dead.

  • Chopsuey

    Silicone tits cushioned the impact, and coke pumped her up enough for her to ignore the bruises. You would think that being a cheap, washed out slut is BAD for your health

  • Be well Lindsay, your millions of fans are praying for you.

  • 8 Inches

    And here I'd always thought she was a train wreck...

  • Johnny Wadd

    I see what you did there

  • Crazy_Hater

    Stupid bitch, what a waste of one sweet ride. Fucking dumb-ass twat!

  • LIZ THE SHIZ

    paybacks a bitch Lindsay will be getting rear ended in hell

  • Paul

    We will all be praying for Lindsay's speedy recovery from her injuries. It was obviously a tragic accident. Be well Lindsay, your millions of fans are praying for you.

  • like Margaret said I am blown away that a mother able to profit $8893 in 1 month on the internet. did you see this web link (Click on menu Home more information) http://goo.gl/kBwZ0

  • Finally got your original name back, Morgan?


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