If only the perfume came in a bigger bottle

Someone at the Home Shopping Network must have an awesome sense of humor because Snooki's getting a 2-hour primetime special on the channel next month to sell her new perfume and other assorted crap that literally hundreds of thousands of people are going to buy to give away as a gag gift. Seriously, she's fucking brilliant. She's gonna make millions off this. From UPI:
HSN is betting Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi's signature fragrance will be a "must have" holiday gift, giving her a two-hour prime time slot to debut the new scent.

"The Jersey Shore" reality TV star known for her trademark indoor tan will launch the perfume "Snooki" along with a product line that includes handbags, slippers, sunglasses and her beloved stuffed animal "Crocodilly," on Nov. 10 on HSN.

"A Very Snooki Holiday Gift Special" will air from 8 to 10 p.m. EST, the shopping network said Wednesday in a release.
What is this perfume supposed to smell like? Vomit? Desperation? No, there's a simple 3 step process you can follow to get the same fragrance as Snooki without having to pay for it. Step 1: lick the inside of a dirty ashtray. Step 2: roll around in feces. Step 3: repeat steps 1 and 2 every ten minutes. Frankly, what Snooki should really be promoting is a miracle elixir designed to prevent you from smelling like her -- called "soap."

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*23 Snooki pictures total in the gallery:

  • Snooki The Grove 1
  • Snooki The Grove 2
  • Snooki The Grove 3
  • Snooki The Grove 4
  • Snooki The Grove 5
  • Snooki The Grove 6
  • Snooki The Grove 7
  • Snooki The Grove 8
  • Snooki The Grove 9
  • Snooki The Grove 10
  • Snooki The Grove 11
  • Snooki The Grove 12
  • Snooki The Grove 13
  • Snooki The Grove 14
  • Snooki The Grove 15
  • Snooki The Grove 16
  • Snooki The Grove 17
  • Snooki The Grove 18
  • Snooki The Grove 19
  • Snooki The Grove 20
[WENN]
  • Gothchick89

    wow pete wtf did you just say u better ohh i swear to you u better be fucking kidding me dude good example sooooooo u want young girls to do what she does go to clubs bring random guys home every night and possibly cathc a nstd by next years r u serious your very retarted dude watch jersey shore one more time and than say something else dude and fyi the bottle looks cheap and fucking ugly like her ok.....

  • Gianna

    They should have called it Jersey Whore.

  • Elejobim

    like i wanna smell like new jersey skank. puhlease.

  • Kylimayrow

    Please make their 15 mins. over....

  • Hawk

    What does herpes smell like?

  • Jesse

    that's not perfume it's bronzer.

  • Hollee

    @Pete: i hope u were being sarcastic.

  • drunken pig

    Oh boy sweet .. I love the smell of dead carcass and cheap whiskey ...

  • WTF

    Probably smells like week old tuna sauteed in sweat & stale beer.

  • Unruly

    (and/or) Vodka and farts.

    This country is killing itself.

  • Anon

    It probably smells like Vinnie's dried sperm stains on her smelly vag.

  • Pete

    I love Snooki and will buy her perfume for my girlfriend. Snooki is a good example for young American girls to follow. At her young age, she is already a millionair. What an accomplished young lady, beautiful, a talented actress, a book author and shrewd business women. Jersey Girls Rule


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