Hugh Hefner's ex Crystal Harris is a total bitch

You don't kick a man's oxygen tank when he's down. I'm sorry but you just don't. The nerve of this Crystal Harris bitch. From the New York Post:
Crystal Harris, 25, told radio shock jock Howard Stern on Tuesday that she had never seen the 85 year-old magazine mogul naked, and that their sex life left a lot to be desired.

"Hef doesn't really take off his clothes. I have never seen him naked," she giggled in an appearance on Stern's SiriusXM radio show . . . "I was over it. I just like, walked away. I am not turned on by Hef. Sorry."

Harris, who left Hefner and his Playboy Mansion five days before their planned June 18 wedding, claimed the pair only had sex once during their two-year relationship, and that it lasted "like about two seconds."
I don't know who comes across worse in this story -- the 85-year-old grandfather that lasts only 2 seconds in the sack or the gold-digging prostitute who actually had sex with the 85-year-old grandfather that lasts only 2 seconds in the sack. In Hugh's defense, I probably wouldn't have lasted much longer if I nailed someone that had tits like Crystal. And in Crystal's defense, the smell of hundred dollar bills can cover the stench of Ben Gay and Musilex.

*37 Crystal Harris pictures total in the gallery:

  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 1
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 2
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 3
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 4
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 5
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 6
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 7
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 8
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 9
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 10
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 11
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 12
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 13
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 14
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 15
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 16
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 17
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 18
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 19
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 20
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 21
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 22
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 23
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 24
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 25
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 26
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 27
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 28
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 29
  • Crystal Harris Total Bitch 30
[WENN]

Would You Rather?

Would You Rather...? Spend one night with: