Mel Gibson strikes plea deal

Mel Gibson struck -- pun intended -- a plea deal today and will avoid jail time for assaulting his commie ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva (mind you, Mel admitted to hitting her in a sworn declaration). Sweet, you can hit chicks now and not go to jail? I never knew that. Was that one of those new laws that passed this year? This changes my whole outlook on life. Let's see that whore waitress bring my potato skins late again! Mel's attorney Blair Berk said in a statement:

"I know from almost 20 years as a criminal defense lawyer that sometimes justice can come for a client at too high a personal price," Gibson's attorney Blair Berk said in a statement this morning. "That is particularly so for Mel, whose right to due process can only be exercised in this case with an enormous media circus attached.

"Mel's priority through all of this has been that the best interests of his young daughter Lucia and the rest of his children be put first in any decisions made. It is with only that in mind that he asked me to approach the District Attorney with a proposal that would bring all of this to an immediate end."

As part of Mel's plea deal, he'll have to serve 6 months as Charlie Sheen's assistant. That's almost, like, worse than jail. Can you imagine waking up every morning knowing that, at some point during the day, you're going to have to clean up a puddle of semen?

*5 Mel Gibson pictures total in the gallery:

[Flynet]