Heidi wants smaller implants

Heidi Montag wants smaller implants

Just when she was starting to get on my good side, Heidi Montag has to get this crazy idea in her head that she wants smaller tits. You selfish bitch. From Life & Style:

“I’m desperate to go back to normal,” [Heidi] confides to Life & Style. “I’m downgrading and going a little smaller, to a D or a double D.”

Just a D or a DD? But then she'll be just like all the other small-breasted freaks out there. How will anyone take her seriously?

Besides being unable to hug her four dogs or wear anything but custom-made clothing, “I’m obsessed with fitness but it’s impossible to work out with these boobs,” she says. “It’s heartbreaking. I can’t live an everyday life.”

And while Heidi tells Life & Style she is currently shopping for a surgeon in South America, she worries that she'll be trapped in this cartoonish body forever after the untimely passing of her confidant Dr. Ryan. “I feel trapped in my own body,” Heidi tells Life & Style.

Well no wonder she wants to go to South America for this surgery. No reputable U.S. doctor would ever reduce the size of a woman's breasts. That's just crazy. But with a suitcase full of American dollars, you can get anything you want in South America. My friend actually got an iPad installed in his stomach. It is the coolest damn thing you've ever seen. We watched a movie on it yesterday.

*15 Heidi Montag photos total in the gallery:

[WENN]

Joe

An iPad in your stomach reminds me of a teletubby.

Al

I don't know how Spencer can walk with Paul's head up his ass. This is just another HM PR debacle, a bad choice leading to another bad decision looking stupid. She won't be considered a viable actress with big tits and no skills. Better is to get them taken down w/o the PR, hide for a year, take some real acting lessons, get rid of the pussy boy and come back into TV as a re-occuring walk-on hot chick like the redhead on 2 1/2 men reruns, she continues to have a TV career.

bj

guessing Spencer used the jumbo strap-on on paul

anonymous

Wow...Paul's recent homosexual encounter with Spencer has really got him cock whipped.

Paul

Listen to Spencer and do what he tells you. Spencer's intellegence, knowledge and opinions are invaluable to you. He is more than a super handsome face, awesomely proportioned body, and superior lover. He has a first class mind. BTW, you can note in these pictures how handsome Spencer is. Obey Spencer Heidi, obey him.

Nick Manning

Don't remove those perfect tits!

Slim Shady

Maybe she'll find a surgeon that does brain and personality implants...

Whorrible

Her face has more oil on it than a Florida beach.