I wish I could slap her

There have been reports that Lindsay Lohan has been receiving preferential treatment in jail, getting new clothes and special food; and staying in a cell with a TV, regular bed, dresser, and private phone. It's basically like a vacation in Cancun without the beach, views, and drunk college girls stumbling back to their rooms just asking to be taken advantage of . . . not that I would know anything about that. Well it turns out the other prisoners are pissed, and they're letting Lindsay know it. Hmmm, maybe not the best idea to piss off a bunch of violent felons. From New York magazine:

Lindsay Lohan has reportedly been brought to tears in jail, because her inmates have been calling her "fire crotch." This actually sounds awful, made even worse by the dubious tale of her inmates "chanting" this nickname while she lays in her cell. One recently-released inmate explained: "Lindsay didn't say nothing. She was crying though." Apparently the other girls are sick of seeing the starlet receive special treatment: "Like if she even moves, they put the whole facility on lockdown. It happens all the time," a relative of an inmate explained.

Fire crotch? What is this, 4th grade? Wouldn't a ziploc baggie full of urine get their point across better? Certainly worked on my mailman. Now whose getting their mail delivered on Sundays, bitch!
[WENN]